Give Yourself a Gift for No Reason or For Just Being You

Image Copyright 2015 Glenn Stok
Image Copyright 2015 Glenn Stok

Do you ever feel sad because you're having a bad day? Do you sometimes feel in a rut because things just aren't going right? Do you find yourself feeling discouraged?

I'll tell you what I've done to feel better during several unhappy times in my life. This may give you some ideas of how to be kind to yourself when it's most important.

Sometimes you just need to be kind to yourself. Give yourself a gift for no reason, or for just being – you!

This article is not for those who have clinical depression. I recommend that if you have uncontrollably bad feelings you should seek help from a professional.

I’m generally healthy when it comes to mood swings. I think I felt really down only three times in my life. I can’t really consider those times as a depression. It was more like being sad, feeling glum, or just plain melancholy. That’s a good word for it!

I remember back in the '70s when something was making me miserable. I don’t remember what it was, but I remember what I did about it.

I decided to be extra good to myself. I can share with you my thought process.

I thought of myself as my own best friend. I wanted to reward myself for getting through a tough time, so I decided to give myself a really expensive gift, something that I would want, and something that would put me in a happy place.

Getting Into a Happy Place

My First Unhappy Time

The first Sony Betamax gave me happy memories and put me in my happy place.
The first Sony Betamax gave me happy memories and put me in my happy place.


Oh the seventies! What memories! It was the time when video cassette recorders (VCR's) were just coming out.

One day in May of 1975 I was feeling down about something, so I bought myself a Sony Betamax. It was big, it was heavy, and cost over $1000 at that time.

That first model only recorded for 30 minutes, and it didn’t even have a built-in timer to schedule recordings. Later on, longer Beta tape cartridges allowed increased recording time. Later models eventually included a timer to set for recording programs while away.

Who knew what advancements would be coming next? I was in a rush to get a gift for myself. And the Betamax was the only video recorder at that time.

I did spend more money again later on, buying another more modern video recorder. Recorders with the VHS format were released just a year later, in October 1976, by JVC.

The VHS units had many more useful features than Sony had put in the first Betamax. VHS VCR's had tape cartridges that recorded up to six hours, and they were much less expensive.

Sure, the Beta Technology was the better of the two, but VHS took over the market. You might recall that cassette tapes won over eight-track tapes in the same way. Remember those?

Anyway, that’s all beside the point. My Betamax did put me in my Happy Place.


Cuckoo for Cuckoo Clocks

A Second Experience Feeling Gloomy


Another time in my life when I was again having those feelings of sadness, I remembered having a little cuckoo clock on the wall in my bedroom when I was a child growing up. I don’t know what happened to that clock, but I had lingering fond memories of watching the cuckoo pop out on the hour.

Now, as an adult, and another time when I felt down, I decided to get a real big cuckoo clock as a way of being good to myself. I wanted to give myself a really nice gift, a real functioning, really eloquent, fun to watch, cuckoo clock.

I knew I needed to find one with more than just a little bird. I wanted one that ran a whole week on the pull of real weights and had other animated stuff going on.

Having done my research I discovered that the real cuckoo clocks are made in the Black Forest of Germany. Craftsmen make them by hand. I found a company that actually built them to specs.


My Cuckoo Clock that I purchased from the Black Forest of Germany
My Cuckoo Clock that I purchased from the Black Forest of Germany


I ordered direct from one of the clock builders overseas. It cost me over $600, but I was able to specify that I wanted animals carved into the wood frame; I wanted real wooden clock hands instead of plastic; I wanted little people dancing when the cuckoo cuckooed; and I had a choice of those people being made of plastic or hand carved and painted wood. I went for it all. After all, it’s a one-time investment in my happiness. Right?

It was marvelous. It put me in my happy place. The weights only had to be pulled up once a week. Every hour, on the hour, the cuckoo would poke his head out and cuckoo. Then little figurines of dancers would dance around for a few seconds while music played. Oh yes, I was able to select the music when I placed the custom order. It has a music box built in!

It got me out of my depression. And it continues to give me pleasure every hour of every day.


Sternreiter - German Hand Carved Cuckoo Clock with Eight-day Movement
Sternreiter - German Hand Carved Cuckoo Clock with Eight-day Movement

I later discovered that one could find pre-built versions of really great cuckoo clocks on Amazon. I even found this one that’s very similar to mine.

It was even cheaper on Amazon than I paid for mine when I ordered direct from the Black Forest. If I were to do it again, I'd order from Amazon.

 

Feeling of Time Running Out

My Third Melancholy Occurrence


When I turned 65 recently I found myself having those pangs of gloom for the third time in my life. I know it’s only temporary. I know it’s just a turning point in my life. The changes taking place, planning to retire, and learning about Medicare, intensifies the realization that I’m getting older.

So, once again, I decided to reward myself for getting through it. What to do? What should I give myself this time? Maybe something related to time itself. After all, time is running out as we age.

You might be thinking right now, why in the world would I want a gift related to time running out. Sure. I agree. However, looking at it from another angle (I tend to think outside the box), I’d like to think of a way to give myself time.

Wicked Witch of the West and her Hourglass
Wicked Witch of the West and her Hourglass

One day I stumbled upon a repeat of the original Wizard of Oz on one of the movie channels. I loved that movie when I was young, so I watched it.

Do you remember the scene where the Wicked Witch of the West used her hourglass to give Dorothy an hour to give her the ruby slippers?

Well, it suddenly dawned on me!

That’s it! I wanted a really big, really real, really fancy hourglass. One that really had sand that ran for a full hour. Yes! That would put me in my happy place!


My 60-minute hourglass I bought online from Amazon
My 60-minute hourglass I bought online from Amazon


As I usually do, I started off doing some research. Google is great for researching things. I remember those days when I used to go to the library and read through dozens of microfiche. Things are so different in today’s world with the Internet.

Just imagine how the world will be 100 years from now when everyone is connected to each other via implanted microchips. That’s not so far-fetched, our cars will be functioning that way in our lifetime.

Anyway, I digress. Getting back to the hourglass, I ordered direct from a craftsman who hand carves the frame that holds the glass bulbs where the sand runs through. He builds each one on demand. Cool. I even was able to select the wood and the color of sand.

He tells me that psychotherapists usually order one with 50 minutes of sand since they use it to show their patients when the session is over. Their hour session with a therapist is really only 50 minutes. Am I digressing again?

I was looking forward to getting my hourglass, but after a couple of weeks I called to check on the status or the order. He told me he had trouble getting more bulbs, so I canceled the order and got my money back.

Back to square one, I turned to Amazon and found a huge choice of options. No need to buy a custom hourglass. Amazon has all kinds, and I saved a lot.


Hourglass Sand Timer - 60 Minute 1 Hour Wood Sand Timer for Kitchen, Office, School and Decorative Use - Cherry Finish with Real Beach Color Sand
Hourglass Sand Timer - 60 Minute 1 Hour Wood Sand Timer for Kitchen, Office, School and Decorative Use - Cherry Finish with Real Beach Color Sand

I can't imagine that I was willing to pay $300 for a custom handcrafted hourglass. How silly of me. I found this one on amazon for under $50 with tax. It’s 7 ½ inches tall and is precise to 60 minutes within 5 seconds. Yes, I timed it.

 


I plan to use it to time my writing sessions. When I get focused, I lose all sense of time.

By the way, I didn't order the hourglass that the Wicked Witch used with flying monkeys carved into the wood, although I found that online too.

I didn’t feel that one was appropriate since I’m a good witch who’s in my happy place once again.



© 2015 Glenn Stok

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Comments 24 comments

brakel2 profile image

brakel2 17 months ago from Oklahoma City, Oklahoma

Hi Glenn - I loved this hub with all the great ideas. Someone said to reward yourself with a new outfit to brighten your life. Research excites me, so I relate to the research to purchase these rewards. The cuckoo clock is my favorite because of the delightful dancing. When I am a little down, I love to pick a project or purchase an item. Now I will think of your hub, an encouraging suggestion to lift myself to the sky. Blessings, Audrey Sharing.


B. Leekley profile image

B. Leekley 17 months ago from Kalamazoo, Michigan, USA

Glenn, you are proof positive that money can buy happiness and that owning stuff is a way to happiness--if you are easily pleased by simple pleasures. I have gotten a shot of happiness from an ice cream cone, a day trip to a Lake Michigan public beach, a shopping spree to the Salvation Army on sales day, these pleasures shared with my wife. I admire y0ur positive uses of your spending cash.


Glenn Stok profile image

Glenn Stok 17 months ago from Long Island, NY Author

brakel2 - Glad to hear you do that too Audrey. I didn't know for sure how people were going to react to this hub.


Glenn Stok profile image

Glenn Stok 17 months ago from Long Island, NY Author

B. Leekley - I didn't think that I was providing proof! But thanks for the compliment Brian. I love the examples you gave.


lyoness913 profile image

lyoness913 17 months ago from Overland Park, KS

I do the same sorts of things, but they usually have to do with clothing, bath stuff, or jewelry. I think it does help! :)

-Wendi


Glenn Stok profile image

Glenn Stok 17 months ago from Long Island, NY Author

lyoness913 - Thanks Wendi. It's great to hear that others do the same thing.


denise.w.anderson profile image

denise.w.anderson 17 months ago from Bismarck, North Dakota

One of the things that I learned in going through mental health therapy was that I needed to reward myself for my efforts, after all, no one else was going to! I had to give myself permission to buy things that I wanted or needed. Now that I have been doing this for a while, I start to feel deprived if for some reason, I have to use that money for someone or something else! It is a great way to help keep your feelings of self-worth up to reward yourself on a regular basis.


Glenn Stok profile image

Glenn Stok 17 months ago from Long Island, NY Author

denise.w.anderson - You are right-on with the way you explained this. Many people don't think of rewarding themselves for their own efforts. It truly is a way keep our feelings of self-worth up, as you said. Thanks for a very meaningful comment.


MsDora profile image

MsDora 17 months ago from The Caribbean

Thanks for helping me not feel guilty about rewarding myself. We all deserve to be in that happy place occasionally. You showed us!


Glenn Stok profile image

Glenn Stok 17 months ago from Long Island, NY Author

MsDora - We all have a right to be rewarded for our success as well as for those times when we simply make it through tough times.


JamaGenee profile image

JamaGenee 17 months ago from Central Oklahoma

Great hub, Glenn, although at 65 an hourglass did seem like an odd choice until I read the explanation, then it made perfect sense!

I've always been a great believer in rewarding one's self for big and little accomplishments, even if the "reward" is something as fleeting a taking a different route home through a park to stop and enjoy the flowers. "Joy" being the key syllable in "enjoy". But for big ticket purchases, I had to overcome being raised by parents who *never* bought anything brand-new. Nothing wrong with that as long as the item isn't visibly damaged and works as a new one should, right?

My watershed moment came when my umpteenth used "tube" TV bit the dust. Time to come into the 21st century and get a flat screen. But wonder of wonders, instead of heading for the nearest pawn shop as I normally would, I took a deep breath and ordered a brand-new flat screen from Amazon - after combing the reviews, of course, for the most reliable brand at the best price.

But that wasn't the real "because I'm worth it!" moment. That was when I clicked "next-day delivery" and didn't cringe at how much speed costs these days, or go back and change it to my standard "whenever you get around to shipping it is fine" option.

That said, I'd really like a lighted globe on a stand a la Father Tim's in the Mitford series by Jan Karon, but can't make myself even look for one, let alone fork out the big bucks if I found one. I'd rather spend that money on a trip to some place on my "Must See Before I Die" list! ;D


Glenn Stok profile image

Glenn Stok 17 months ago from Long Island, NY Author

JamaGenee - There are all sorts of self-gifts that inspire us and the desire is different for each of us. The idea of a "must see" makes me think of what's known as a "bucket list" of things we want to do before we die. Maybe you can include your Illuminated Globe on that list. I know what you mean, they range anywhere from $20 to thousands of dollars.


FlourishAnyway profile image

FlourishAnyway 16 months ago from USA

I find that this self-reward can be very motivating and downright blissful. Even if it's something unique like a soldering iron so you can pursue a whim, bring on the happy.


Glenn Stok profile image

Glenn Stok 16 months ago from Long Island, NY Author

FlourishAnyway - Yes, it doesn't matter what it is. What's special to you is what's important. Be happy!


RTalloni 16 months ago

This is a neat read. It's a proven fact that spending money gives people an emotional boost. Good for you for not indulging in pity parties when you were melancholy. A friend and I were talking this evening about how if God gives us years of old age they can be some of the best of our lives if we focus on what really counts.


Glenn Stok profile image

Glenn Stok 16 months ago from Long Island, NY Author

RTalloni - I agree with you. Focussing on what really counts is definitely one of the most important things in order to have a happy life.


billybuc profile image

billybuc 15 months ago from Olympia, WA

I love the idea of giving ourselves gifts. It's something I have always been reluctant to do, but I definitely see the value. Thank you for a much-needed read.


Glenn Stok profile image

Glenn Stok 15 months ago from Long Island, NY Author

billybuc - Thanks for stopping by Billy. Glad you liked this idea of self-gifting.


swilliams profile image

swilliams 15 months ago from Arizona

Glenn this Hub is very entertaining! I really enjoyed the funny spin on the gifts lifted and ironically, I do have a cuckoo clock. I had to take it down though, because it was driving me crazy. My family was stationed in Germany and we had a clock similar to the one mentioned in your article. The clock was fun to have around growing up, but when I got older...not so much. Thank you for the creative article! Voted up!


Glenn Stok profile image

Glenn Stok 15 months ago from Long Island, NY Author

swilliams - I wonder if you took down your cuckoo clock because you couldn't stand the cuckoo after a while Emunah. Was that the reason?

My clock actually lets me shut off the dancing people, the music and the cuckoo. I had to shut it off every night or else it would wake me up. Lately I just leave it off completely and only use it to tell the time. I'm glad you enjoyed my hub and thanks for the vote up.


Charito1962 profile image

Charito1962 15 months ago from Manila, Philippines

Hi, Glenn! Yes, it does make one feel better if he gifts himself with something.

Growing up in the '70s till the '80s, I liked gifting myself with cassettes and LPs of my favorite artists/musicians. Then, in the '90s, I splurged on CDs. These were items that lifted my spirits whenever I was down.

Today, music is still my reliever in sad times.


Glenn Stok profile image

Glenn Stok 15 months ago from Long Island, NY Author

Charito1962 - Items that lift your spirits and definitely worthwhile. I agree that music has a way to make one feel better. Thanks for your comment.


fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 15 months ago from Beautiful Upstate New York

Glenn......No reason for you to feel "down" at this time. CONGRATULATIONS on your 2015 Hubbie Award. Job well done. You are deserving. Celebrate!!....Paula


Glenn Stok profile image

Glenn Stok 15 months ago from Long Island, NY Author

fpherj48 - You're right Paula. The greatest gift is one of recognition.

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    Glenn Stok1,121 Followers
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    Glenn Stok is an award-winning author who likes to share his ideas and inspiration to help make life happier, healthier, and more enjoyable.



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