St Patricks Day Jokes and Riddles For Kids

Photo: paperbydesign, Flickr
Photo: paperbydesign, Flickr

What better way to get in the spirit than with a good joke. Here are St. Patrick's Day jokes for kids collected from around the web. These are all G-Rated and reasonably good taste. Remember that jokes are more than just fun. Telling jokes develops language and though it may make you groan, the pun is the highest form of language development. Besides, it's fun. You can't raise children without a serious side of humor! So go ahead - act like the dork you are and help your children learn at the same time with these cute St. Patrick's Day jokes for kids.

St. Patrick

Why did St. Patrick drive the snakes out of Ireland? He couldn't afford plane fare.

Why did St. Patrick drive the snakes out of Ireland? Because it was too far for them to crawl.

Why do people wear shamrocks on St. Patrick's Day? Regular rocks are too heavy.

Knock, knock!

Who's there?


Irish who?

Irish you a happy St. Patrick's Day!


How did the Irish Jig get started?

Too much to drink and not enough restrooms!


What do you call a clumsy Irish dance?

A jig mistake!


How can you tell if an Irishman is having a good time?

He's Dublin over with laughter!


What does Ireland have more of than any other country?



Cook l: What do you think of my Irish stew?

Cook 2: It could use a pinch of Gaelic.


What's Irish and stays out all night?

Patty O'furniture!


What did one Irish ghost say to the other?

'Top o' the moaning!


What's big and purple and lies next to Ireland?

Grape Britain!

Luck & Leprechauns

What do you get if you cross poison ivy with a four-leaf clover??

A rash of good luck!


Why do leprechauns have pots o'gold?

They like to "go" first class!


What would you get if you crossed a leprechaun with a Texan?

A pot of chilli at the end of the rainbow!


What would you get if you crossed a leprechaun with a frog?

A little green man with a croak of gold!


Did you hear about the leprechaun who went to jail?

He was a lepre-con!


Why can't you borrow money from a leprechaun?

Because they're always a little short.


Did you hear about the leprechaun who worked at the diner?

He was a short-order cook!


Do leprechauns get angry when you make fun of their height?

Yeah, but only a little!


Why did the leprechaun stand on the potato?

To keep from falling in the stew!


Do leprechauns make good secretaries?

Sure, they're great at shorthand!


How did the leprechaun beat the Irishman to the pot of gold?

He took a shortcut!


What do leprechauns love to barbecue?

Short ribs!


Why are leprechauns so hard to get along with?

Because they're very short-tempered!


What baseball position do leprechauns usually play?



What do you get when two leprechauns have a conversation?

A lot of small talk!


What did the leprechaun say to the elf?

How's the weather up there?


Knock, knock!

Who's there?


Warren who?

Warren anything green today?


Why did the man cross the road?

Because there was a leprechaun on the other side with a pot of gold.


What does a leprechaun call a happy man wearing green?

A Jolly Green Giant


Why do frogs like St. Patrick's Day?

Because they're always wearing green


What do you get when you cross a pillowcase with a stone?

A sham rock

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Comments 18 comments

thedutchman profile image

thedutchman 5 years ago

Thanks for sharing your riddles and jokes. I love it!^^keep it up

Samantha Gomez  5 years ago

I think this jokes and riddle are really funny!!!!! you should put more so everyone would want to see them!!!!!!!

Jaimee 5 years ago

Very Good

shannon 5 years ago

very funny

Pete Maher profile image

Pete Maher 5 years ago

This was McHilarious! It was funnier for my son, but the hub does mention the wee laddies and lassies. That's no Blarney.

MRS. STUPID JOKES 5 years ago


andre 6 years ago


Andre 6 years ago

why do leprechauns laugh when they run because their balls itch

Suzanne 7 years ago

I loved the jokes! I'm Irish and I enjoyed these a lot! Thanks!

Valerie 7 years ago

Thanks this was perfect, we'll use your jokes for our afterschool program kids, and for our St. Patrick's day luncheon for our seniors. They'll all get a kick out them.

Madison 7 years ago

not funny!!!!!!!

Rob Jundt profile image

Rob Jundt 8 years ago from Midwest USA

Patty O' Furniture. That's a good one!

WeddingConsultant profile image

WeddingConsultant 8 years ago from DC Metro Area

Nice! I'm not Irish, but I love the music. Does that count for something?


Bonnie Ramsey profile image

Bonnie Ramsey 8 years ago from United States


These are adorable! My hubby is Irish so I can't wait to tease him with a few of these! Thanks for sharing!


VioletSun profile image

VioletSun 8 years ago from Oregon/ Name: Marie

This is funny. Enjoyed the froggie joke the most. :)

flread45 profile image

flread45 8 years ago from Montana

Why do frog's wear green?to keep from getting pinched.

Karen and Lesley profile image

Karen and Lesley 8 years ago from United Kingdom

Really enjoyed the hub. Good laugh I'll try some of these out on people


maham profile image

maham 9 years ago

very funny

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