Things You Can and Cannot Do at a Lavish Dinner Party
Dinner parties: Who comes. Who doesn't come.
In my limited knowledge of the party scene, I do know that in certain society levels there are cocktail parties, holiday parties, anniversary and birthday parties and then there is the noted dinner party. Do not be confused by the title. At a dinner party held in elite society, there "is" expensive food, liquor, and tall tales mixed with a few nice lies and exaggerations about one's success, job, or business expansion.
Guests who are invited, not told to just "show up," are treated to fine foods and drinks all paid for by the wealthy hosts who can gain a few notches in the Social Ladder by how much they fork-out on food and booze. Did you know that? I didn't. But when I found this out, I almost gasped with disbelief. I mean if having so much money your great, great grand children's children will never spend it all isn't a solid tool for a few high rungs on the Social Ladder, I doubt that a few thousand pounds of Beluga caviar and a hundred cases of Maker's Mark scotch will do the trick for the rich and secluded.
Rules for the extremely-rich?
I know that you are just "chomping at the bits" to ask, "can a person be so wealthy that if invited to one of these social shindigs, they can do whatever they please?"
You bet. But a garden variety wealthy person will be expected to adhere to the rules laid down by the dinner party host and hostess. You see, there is a price to be paid even to the average wealthy person, so to the young people in my readership, do not be a prisoner of goals that are too lofty and impossible to reach. Deal?
Special Notice . . .
And if we should see each other at a lavish dinner party in the near future, I will be sure and talk highly of you. Just by me acknowledging you at a lavish dinner party will help your social status immensely.
The rules I just spoke of are in this list of
Things You Can and Cannot Do at a Lavish Dinner Party
(I begin with)
Things That You Cannot Do at a Lavish Dinner Party:
Show Up Late--This is very disrespectful to the host and hostess. Now if you are one of their close relatives, be as late as you like. But if you are not blood kin, be on time.
Over-fill Your Plate--Do not act like this is the first time you have laid eyes on food and fill your plate, which by the way is also expensive, to the point of you having to do a balancing act to get the plate back within control. Although this is not a buffet, you have to be able to eat moderately and you want seconds, do it very discreetly or be thought of as a "empty gut or pit." And eating seconds at one of these events can send a dangerous signal to the other wealthy people that your business or investments are not doing that well and because you got seconds, you may not get an invitation to another dinner party.
Eat Poultry--With a knife and fork. Not with fingers. Show some manners and you will not draw unwanted attention to yourself.
Openly Belching--While eating your expensive foods. Belching is not for elite classes of Americans. Belching says that you are really a "rube" with a few million dollars. So be careful and hold in that belch as well as gas in your colon that will form from eating all of this costly caloric choices.
Getting Intoxicated--While eating. You can rub your host and hostess the wrong way by keeping "Hal," one of their servants standing near your seating just so he won't have to walk that far to fill your wine glass.
Scuffing Feet--Of others sitting near you. Especially if it is the dainty feet of "Sally Whitworth Firestone," heiress to the Firestone Rubber Co. fortune. When you drink lots of wine and not eat an equal amount of food, you will be tipsy and relax. This includes your feet. And of all the feet at this dinner party, you do not want to scuff "Sally Whitworth Firestone's" feet underneath the table or she, at age 77, will think you are coming on to her and have you sent home or jailed.
Get Crumbs--On your suit coat or shirt. This shows you are a clumsy man who has not been schooled in the fine arts of manners. So take small bites. This is how you keep crumbs off of your suit coat and shirt.
Pick Your Teeth--At the dining table. Talk about gross.
Nod-Off--And begin snoring due to all of the rich food and liquor you have consumed.
Talk Loud--To people sitting or standing clear across the huge dining room.
Things That You Can Do at a Lavish Dinner Party:
(Now I finish with)
Smile At--People, especially the hostess, at various intervals. This shows you approve of her food and booze choices.
Act As If--You are hanging on every word said by the wealthy socialites sitting near you at the table. This will make them feel superior which they are, but at least you will not be asked to leave.
Rise From--Your chair when a woman leaves the table or approaches the table. Friend, if you want a real "ace in the hole," this will do it for you. Why? No gentlemen do this in 2015 that I know of. This gesture shows the lady you respect her. And if she owns a few shopping malls, that too is credited to your good manners.
Bow At--The waist when introduced to females. This too is not practiced by even the wealthy men in 2015 and the women will love it.
Go To Your--Personal hairstylist before you get to this dinner party. Tell your hairstylist that you want to look as close to Fred Astaire as possible with his hair slicked-down and shining in room light.
Ask At--The right time if you can propose a toast to the host and hostess for inviting you to such a lavish and well-designed dinner party. The host and hostess have ego' too and you can make valuable points with them if you do this.
Be Sure--To ask other guests if they are dog or cat-lovers and then follow their lead. Believe this or not, a lot of big business deals have been made over talking about cats and dogs and why people love them.
Do Not--Wear out your welcome. Although you have known the host and hostess for years. This shows respect for them and you will not be talked about in a bad way when you leave.
Make Time--To thank the help before you leave. The chefs, servants, butlers, and so on. This too will show your other wealthy friends just how much class that you have.
Agree With--Most everything people say to you. Although they are wrong with their facts, an ugly argument could break-out by you correcting the guest with incorrect facts. Be cool. People love that.
Office workers, pay close attention to this!
More by this Author
You think that eating as much as you can hold is fun? Think again. Try to understand what it is like to be a competitive eater.
I am NOT a Scrooge. Just upfront.
Destination America, a channel on DirecTV, has a new show, Mountain Monsters. The show is about guys who investigate sightings of mysterious creatures reported by average citizens. This is my opinion.