Most important christmas information
TOP TEN: CHRISTMAS FOODS
The one day everyone forgets about calories
Your great grandmother always sends you at least one in the mail
While meant to decorate the Christmas tree, they somehow end up in your stomach
They always end up in the half eaten pieces as opposed to their original shape of men
The Christmas drink you hate
CANDY CANE ICE CREAM
You secretly get excited to see it appear at the grocery store during the holiday season
It is the center piece as opposed to a part of the main course
A distraction from the snow storm outside
The family chef spent hours perfecting
Although appear as deformed gremlins as opposed to santa
ADVENTS CALENDER CHOCOLATES
You secretly look forward to indulging every day of December
TOP TEN: ANTI-CHRISTMAS SONGS
For everyone that does not feel like decking the halls and well for people not feeling the Christmas spirit
THE NIGHT SANTA WENT CRAZY by Wierd Al Yakovitch
Santa goes on rampage, shots elves and turns the riendeer into sausages
SANTA'S GONNA KICK YOUR ASS by The Arrogant Worms
From the group who brought you'Canada's really big' comes a song about the reindeer destroying your home and Santa kicking ass
HAPPY HOLIDAY, YOU BASTARD by Blink 182
It makes no sense what so ever but when you are wrapping presents at 3am and tired of fruitcake, put on the song and head bang for 57 seconds
AN ANTI-CHRISTMAS CAROL by Joss Stone
A stressed mom and a broken oven. kids fighting and lots of debt...sound familiar?
HAVE YOURSELF A MERRY LITTLE CHRISTMAS by Judy Garland
The original lyrics are troubling considering it was during WW2 and the writer knew some wont make it home:' Have yourself a merry little Christmas because it might be your last. Next Year we may all be living in the past.' Garland refused to sing the original
I HATE CHRISTMAS by Oscar the Grouch
When you feel too grouchy from too much eggnog and cheap chocolate, join your fav green gremlin as he wished Christmas trees get termites.
THE TWELVE PAINS OF CHRISTMAS By Bob Rivers
Lets be honest, sometimes fruitcake and sending christmas cards is just a pain
IT IS A VERY JOLLY DAY(FOR YOU TO DIE) by Gregtronic
If you haven't seen' A Harold & Kumar Christmas' get to the theater. Harold & Kumar are clay mated and running from an evil snowman with this song playing in the background
ROAD KILL CHRISTMAS by Bubba J/Jeff Dunham
Instead of slowing down to save the deer, he sped up for pretenderized venison of Christmas
THE NIGHT SANTA WENT CRAZY
TOP TEN: CHRISTMAS FILMS
Just because some of you want to enjoy the Christmas on-screen
A VERY HAROLD AND KUMAR CHRISTMAS(2011)
This 3D stoner comedy film tells the story of two estranged friends on a desperate search for a christmas tree after Kumar destroyed their first one
There are two types of movie fans: hose that expect to be noble and God-fearing with a small sense of humor in the mix , while others would not mind the lovable santa slipping into vulgarity, promiscuity armed burglary. If you fall this last group, you are in for a treat here
Santa Claus is really a demon freed from an angel-enforced pact to be nice. It becomes a holiday of slaughter
One of the greatest roles Will Ferrell can be remebered for is Buddy the Elf from this instant holiday classic.This non-stop laugher exemplifies all age entertainment
A CHRISTMAS STORY
Canadian director Bob Clark's classic story of growing up int the 40's, several holiday shenanigans and the pursuit of a Red Ryder BB-gun
THE SANTA CLAUSE
I am assuming that the readers feel nostalgic about this one, because there’s little else to explain its entry given that horrendous pun in the title. However, Tim Allen manages to inject some pathos into the tale of a divorced father who can’t seem to get things right for his son until the day when he accidentally knocks Santa off his roof and finds himself forced to take Father Christmas’ place. While the set-up and characters are as clichéd as it comes, there’s still some fun for fans in Judge Reinhold’s stepfather figure and David Krumholtz’ elf.
HOW THE GINCH STOLE CHRISTMAS
Despite labouring under about three feet of latex, Jim Carrey still comes across loud and clear in this adaptation of the Dr Seuss poem. While it takes a few more liberties with the story than the 1966 animated version, that’s compensated for by the stunning design and make-up (which won Rick Baker a well-deserved Oscar). And it’s also rather funny – Carrey improvising away despite all the big-budget shenanigans going on around him. Fun fact: adorable moppet Cindy Loo Hoo grew up to be Gossip Girl rock chick Taylor Momsen. Guess she got used to wearing lots of make-up on set
The third beloved Christmas movie to emerge from the 2003 season, Richard Curtis’ sprawling ensemble piece is best watched at this time of year, when you’re bound to find at least one storyline among the several million on offer that you like. Perhaps it’s the porn star stand-ins finding a tentative, awkward sort of romance, or Colin Firth’s fumbling attempts to woo a woman with whom he doesn’t share a common language. But for us it will always be the sad stories here that ring truest, with Laura Linney’s devotion to her brother and Emma Thompson’s quiet heartbreak really hitting home.
The Polar Express is a computer-animated film based on the children’s book of the same title by Chris Van Allsburg. The movie is directed by Robert Zemeckis. It is about a doubting boy looking for the true spirit of Christmas. The boy boards a magical train on Christmas eve which takes him on a fantastic journey to the north pole and Santa’s home. This Christmas, SimEx-Iwerks Entertainment, Warner Brothers, and Dollywood theme park have put combined efforts to create the newest of The 4D Polar Express experiences at the Dollywood theme park. The movie is a wonderful watch for kids. It is rated as 6.7 on Imdb and 6.4 on Rotten Tomatoes.
HOMELESS FOR THE HOLIDAYS
Homeless for the Holidays is a 2009 Christmas film directed by George A. Johnson and starring Matt Moore, Crystal Dewitt-Hinkle and Cole Brandenberger. The movie is about an executive who lands into financial problems after losing his job. He starts working at a burger point. Unable to pay his bills, he fears that his family might lose everything by Christmas.
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