Valentine's Day--What to do--What to say...

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Ladies.....

Do you remember that guy running up, socking you on the arm hard enough to make you cry and then running off laughing? Do you remember getting your friends together to call your favorite guy names so the others wouldn’t know you liked him?

Men.....

Do you remember back in the days when hitting your favorite girl or pulling her hair meant you really liked her? Do you remember the heckling and name calling from the pack of girls standing near the front door (for a quick escape)?

How do you rate?

Are you all grown up?

  • Yes, I will hit my Valentine and run....
  • Yes, I will make fun of my Valentine so no one knows....
  • Yes, I will think hard before I give them a card and a box of chocolates...
  • Yes, I will pick up a last minute stuffed puppy and stick him in a bouquet of flowers...
  • Yes, I will be the hit of the party (and my Valentine will have to drive me home)...
  • Yes, I will cook a romantic dinner and then tell them they owe me...
  • No, but I'm trying.....
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All grown up.......

Well, now we are all grown up and do things much differently, right? Well, at least most of us do. So, Valentine’s Day is coming fast and you have no idea what to get your Valentine this year. Can’t sock ‘em or call ‘em names anymore; you’d go to jail for assault. Can’t dip their hair in an inkwell anymore; with today’s chemical styling supplies their hair might turn neon orange. Can’t even get your friends together for a heckling session (it’s not very romantic). So, what do you do to win their heart forever?

For starters......

Well, for starters, know your Valentine. Learn their colors, favorite foods, favorite games, and favorite places. Find out if they like sports and what types. Find out if they like to stay inside during a snowstorm or go out and enjoy the weather. Find out if they are a rough, outdoorsy type or soft, romantic, fireplace type. Find out if they like flowers and what kind. Find out if they like to grow things. Find out if they like to drive, walk on the beach, or sit by a campfire. Find out if they like to camp or live in luxury in a nice hotel. Find out everything you can.

Easy for long-timers?

Think this ought to be easy for you long-timers since you’ve been with your Valentine for so long that everything is routine, right? WRONG! You have slipped into a vacuum of routine and the expected. Believe it or not, your Valentine, whether new, or comfortably acquainted, can do with some romance. So don’t do the expected; do the unexpected. Do something that will sweep them off their feet and into your arms!

I'm talking to you both....

Your Valentine, Ladies and Gentlemen, needs to know that you love them. They want to know that you care about them and want to do things with them and spend quality time with them. I know, I know, I can hear the words flowing from all of your mouths even before you finish reading this article: “I do spend time with them, I’m with them all the time, so what does she mean?” What I mean is QUALITY time, not QUANTITY time. By that I mean something special that they would like to do and would enjoy.

Don’t accept that this Valentine’s Day will be like all the others. Talk to your Valentine and find out what they would like to do. Carry on a conversation as if you were talking hypothetical (Well, hon, if you could do anything you wanted this year for Valentine’s Day, what would it be?) Or, you could just come right out and say you want to do something different this year. Some people don’t like surprises and you should know if your Valentine is one of them before you begin.

You could plan a romantic evening in a nice hotel with a fireplace, wine, and a favorite romantic movie. Or, you could plan a ski trip for two. How about camping in their favorite get-away spot? Take them out for a walk on the beach or dinner at their favorite restaurant. Then, just when they think that you have done your best, pop the final question….NO, I don’t mean ask them to marry you, although this would be the perfect time for it. No, I was thinking more along the lines of “shall we dance ” or give them a single red rose and tell them “There aren’t enough roses in the world for me to buy to show you how much I love you, so I give you one to represent them all .”

Cute, little-stuffed Teddy Bear.....
Cute, little-stuffed Teddy Bear..... | Source

Here are a few things that most people don't even think about.....

.......when Valentine’s Day rolls around because stores have cute cuddly stuffed animals and hearts filled with chocolates on every shelf trying to entice you to “buy for your Valentine ”.You see them and fall into the same old, “oh how cute, she’ll love it ”, or “that’s his favorite candy, perfect .”Instead of falling for the same routine, try some of the items I have listed below.(And don’t forget to do the romantic dinner, or walk on the beach, etc., first).

You are probably thinking....

Card, flowers, romantic hotel, dinner, movie, I do them all the time, so what next? How can I possibly do anything better than what I have already done and besides, I’m not rich, ya know!

  • Purchase a card that really says what you feel, better yet, make one; you don’t need to be an artist or a professional to make one with words from your own heart
  • Give something that means something to you and them; like keep tickets for your first date, date them and frame them with a picture of the two of you together (didn’t keep the ticket stubs? Most don’t, but there is more you can do.)
  • Take pictures of you and your Valentine’s favorite place and put them in a multi-picture frame with a picture of the two of you in the center
  • Ask before you give cut flowers, some people would rather you didn’t because the flowers will die rather quickly, instead think of a live plant, or silk flowers
  • If your Valentine has a pet, get something for the pet when you get something for your Valentine, like a dog toy or a furry cat toy
  • Gentlemen, take your lady to a garden rich with color for a dinner for two. (Mohegan Sun has some wonderfully romantic restaurants in the New England Area. Go online to get some great ideas.)
  • Ladies, your guy might not want to eat in a romantic restaurant, but they might like to gamble a bit or see a favorite sport in person (Thompson Speedway in the New England Area begins their season in April and tickets to their first event might be something they would like. Go online for places in your area.)

Can you be different?

Can you show your Valentine that you thought about your gift to them?

  • Yes, it will be wonderful, once I figure out what it will be
  • Yes, I have it all planned out
  • No, I can't even think straight when I'm thinking of them
  • No, I guess I'm not that creative
  • Ahh, uhhh, hmmmm, ahhhh, don't know?
  • I will do my very best, ladies and gentlemen, to make you proud of me. And when I am elected--oh, sorry, thought I was being elected because I had done so well.....
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Now, here are some that may, or may not, appeal to everyone, but, again, they are just ideas:

  • Make them a dinner yourself-with your own two hands-get a recipe from a book or go on-line for ideas--The Food Network might be a good place to start
  • Give them an item that you have had monogrammed with their initials or name such as sun glass case or jewelry box-try a mall for something like this
  • Cater to their desires-not those desires people-the ones where they like to watch figure skating; go to the theater; or see an opera. Perhaps they would like to visit a special city or area - Salem, Massachusetts is a popular place in New England - what places are popular in your area? Again, go online for ideas and locations.

So...

Pull out that laptop, turn on your smart phone, get the old desktop fired up and find that perfect, unique, unexpected gift for your Valentine this year. They will thank you for it!

The point I am trying to make is---do something different with your Valentine this year. Do something they won’t expect but would love. Think about possibilities, get creative, and get researching. If you have a Valentine, they should be worth a little bit of effort on your part. And, to top it off, they will love you all the more when you give them a gift that shows real feeling on your part.

© 2012 Cheryl Simonds

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Comments 2 comments

kj force profile image

kj force 3 years ago from Florida

cherylone..Loved the hub..you did a great job , you hit on many good points regarding relationships falling into the category of feeling like " used bedroom slippers " to comfortable and taken for granted..although that may be acceptable for many people..because relationships take work..saddest part is there is always a giver..and a taker..Happy Valentine's Day to you my friend..


cherylone profile image

cherylone 3 years ago from Connecticut Author

kj, I thank you for the compliments and the Valentine's Day wish, I wish you the same (Valentine's Day wish that is), and yes, too many people don't want to work at the relationship and thus allow it to become too comfortable.

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