What do you call people who are afraid of Santa Claus?
Why does Santa have 3 gardens?
So he can ho-ho-ho.
Why was Santa's little helper depressed?
Because he had low elf esteem.
What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?
What do snowmen eat for breakfast?
What's red and white and gives presents to good little fish on Christmas?
What do you get when you cross an archer with a gift-wrapper?
There was once a great czar in Russia named Rudolph the Red.
He stood looking out the windows of is palace one day while his
wife, the Czarina Katerina, sat nearby knitting. He turned to her
and said, "Look my dear, it has begun to rain!" Without even
looking up from her knitting she replied, "It's too cold to rain. It
must be sleeting." The Czar shook his head and said, "I am the
Czar of all the Russias, and Rudolph the Red knows rain, dear!"
T'was the night before Christmas and all through the house, Not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse. The stockings were hung by the chimney with care. They'd been worn all week and needed the air.
Did you know that according to the song, "Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer", Santa has twelve reindeer? Sure, in the introduction it goes "There's Dasher and Dancer and Prancer and Vixen, Comet and Cupid and Donner and Blitzen..." That makes eight reindeer. Then there's Rudolph, of course, so that makes nine. Then there's Olive. You know, "Olive the other reindeer used to laugh..." That makes ten. The eleventh is Howe. You know, "Then Howe the reindeer loved him..." Eleven reindeer. Oh, and number 12? That's Andy! "Andy shouted out with glee." The proof is in the song!
Originally Contributed by: unknown...We were reminded about Andy by Paul Grupe!
Contributed by: Evelien from Belgium
Contributed by: John Barkovich
Q: What do you call Frosty the Snowman in May?
A: A puddle!
Q: Where do reindeer go to dance?
A: Christmas balls!
Q: If Frosty the Snowman married a vampire,what would they name their child?
Contributed by: Cassie Hauser
Q: What's red, white and blue at Christmas time?
A: A sad candy cane!
Contributed by: Laura Sylvester
Q: What did Mary Poppins want from Santa?
Contributed by: Jemima
Q: Who hides in the bakery at Christmas?
A: A mince spy!
Contributed by: Tara Wade
It's a romantic full moon, when Pedro said, "Hey, mamacita, let's do Weeweechu."
Oh no, not now, let's look at the moon!" said Rosita.
Oh, c'mon baby, let's you and I do Weeweechu. I love you and it's the perfect time," Pedro begged.
"But I wanna just hold your hand and watch the moon." replied Rosita.
Please, corazoncito, just once, do Weeweechu with me."
Rosita looked at Pedro and said, "OK, one time, we'll do Weeweechu."
Pedro grabbed his guitar and they both sang.....
"Weeweechu a Merry Christmas, Weeweechu a Merry Christmas, Weeweechu a Merry Christmas, and a Happy New Year.
I loved the weeweechu joke. It reminded me of the spanish version of the national anthem. It's "jose, can't you see?"
By God....those were funny! Had to pull myself back-up off the floor...after the last one. Want to "weechu" a Merry Christmas, KL...thanks for the laffs!
Jesus, the Good Shepherd, loves all of His flock - but, how does He specifically wish Mary a happy holiday?
. . . "Merry Christmas to ewe".
I heard Santa is low on elves this year so he has had to buy most the gifts from e bay, he didn't know he had to bid and came up dry
by Missy4 years ago
I was recently asked what my favourite christmas song is, and I had no idea? When I was younger my favourite Christmas song was Mariah Careys 'All I want for Christmas', but I seem to have grown out of that now and need...
by Randy Godwin5 years ago
Each year I attempt to get into the holiday spirit by inviting Hubbers to publish a Christmas story. No prizes, but the enjoyment of spinning a good tale is often just what is needed to appreciate what this...
by Wayne Orvisburg6 weeks ago
Just curious why you can't say Merry Christmas anymore? I have never got upset when someone said Happy Hanukkah. The way I see it, someone is just wishing good times based on whatever their background is. I think it's...
by Susan Keeping5 years ago
Merry Christmas to all my Hubber friends. I hope you all have a peaceful day.
by Make Money7 years ago
We should not be discouraged from wishing a Merry Christmas to anyone anywhere, including in these forums.So it being December 1st I would like to wish everyone an early Merry Christmas.I will try to post a different...
by Mark Hodges4 years ago
Please read the link below....<snipped - no promotional links in the forums>
Copyright © 2017 HubPages Inc. and respective owners.
Other product and company names shown may be trademarks of their respective owners.
HubPages® is a registered Service Mark of HubPages, Inc.
HubPages and Hubbers (authors) may earn revenue on this page based on affiliate relationships and advertisements with partners including Amazon, Google, and others.