Read on to get your life back!

He’s someone you’d love to bring home to mom: sweet and soft-spoken, financially stable, great in the kitchen, and with just the right amount of good looks. He’s a real “nice guy,” a loyal companion, someone you’d totally trust with your kids.

But maybe he’s too perfect—or maybe he’s just too nice—whatever the case, you simply can’t stand him anymore. You’ve found yourself in a tough situation: How do you break up with a really nice guy? It’s not going to be easy, but here are some things you can do to make it happen: 

1. Prepare yourself. Have a plan and stick to it. Come up with a script if you have to, and rehearse it in the shower. You want to have specific reasons for the breakup, and you want to be ready to deflect the guy’s comebacks when he tries to talk you out of it. If you have a good friend that you can trust to be honest with you, role-play the conversation with him or her as Mr. Nice Guy, and see what kind of feedback your friend can provide. 

2. Do it in public. With other people around, he’ll be less likely to freak out and get emotional on you. You’ll also be able to escape from the situation more easily if you need to. Restaurants are good; bars are better; a bar in a restaurant is probably best. It’s tough to have an awkward conversation while eating anyway. Go to a place that you’re familiar with so you’re playing on your own turf. 

3. Stay sober—both during and after the conversation. It’s okay to have the talk over drinks, but don’t go crazy and pound two or three before you even get started. You may say something you don’t really mean, or vice versa. Likewise, be careful not to get drunk for the rest of the night (and maybe even for a few days after). You don’t want to have your judgment impaired if he tries to call and ask for you back.  

4. Absolutely do not make the all too common mistake of agreeing to sleep together one last time. You’ll wake up in bed next to him the next morning, forget about everything you talked about the night before, and continue to be in a relationship with a guy you don’t really like. When the conversation’s over, you should head home, and tell Mr. Nice Guy to do the same. 

5. When all else fails, just say no. You don’t have to be mean, and you don’t have to hurt feelings, but you do have to be firm. He may beg and plead for another chance, but if you’ve already made up your mind about not wanting to be with the guy, it’s just not worth it. You’re doing the both of you a favor by standing your ground and putting an end to something that just isn’t working.