10 Tips For Living Drug, Alcohol And Smoke Free
99You Don't Have to be a Slave to Your Addictions
Are drugs, alcohol or cigarettes ruling your life? Have you tried quitting only to pick back up again -- even though you really, really want to stop? A healthier life awaits you. You can do it -- I promise! Here are ten ideas to get you on and keep you on the road to recovery.
Tip#1: Accept Help
It doesn't matter if you're a meth addict or a pill popper, a binge drinker or bottle hider, smoke 3 packs a day or 6 joints a day. The chances of kicking your habit on your own -- and sticking with it -- are slim at best. You cannot fight true addiction with willpower. It's a physiological and psychological craving -- way too strong at the cellular level to "just say no."
But you've already figured that out. So now what?
If you have an honest, trusting relationship with your healthcare provider, mention to him/her that you're trying to quit. Many health plans offer smoking cessation and chemical dependency programs.
You'll also want to check out how real people (who once were struggling just like you) live drug/alcohol free. Go to a meeting of Alcoholics Anonymous or Narcotics Anonymous. It's free and there's no obligation. The members will welcome you with open arms and share everything you need to know. Peer-to-peer support is incredibly powerful and effective.
Tip #2 Do Whatever it Takes
Chances are you didn't develop your habit last week. Don't expect to break it overnight, either. It takes time and patience and work. Yes, work. You need to be committed to changing yourself.
If at first you don't succeed, try something different. For some people, attending 12-Step (AA or NA) meetings is enough. Many sufferers require more help. You can try an outpatient program where you take classes to learn about addiction and yourself. These programs will drug/alcohol test you to make sure you're not using between sessions. For some people, this level of accountability is sufficient.
For others, an inpatient rehabilitation (aka "rehab") is needed. These 30, 60 or 90-day programs immerse you in recovery. One to three months in a drug/alcohol-free environment can be a great way to jump-start your clean and sober life.
If you're trying to put down the cancer sticks, there are different schools of thought. Some people advocate going cold turkey for best results. But again, it doesn't work for everybody. That's why they make nicotine patches and gum! There's even a smoker's anonymous group.
Tip #3 Change Your Attitude
Those irresistable cravings will go away in time. To keep them at bay and keep yourself safe from relapsing into old behaviors, you'll need to change your mindset from "addict" to "in recovery." As you learn about the reasons behind your drinking/using, you will discover some very interesting things about yourself. And not just you, but every alcoholic/addict (which is why accepting help from others who have walked the path before you really works).
Changing your attitude about drugs/alcohol/smoking is twofold. First, your relationship to your drug(s) of choice will shift. It will stop being the center of your universe. You'll stop romancing and depending on it to get through your day. You'll start viewing it as poison, lethal, disgusting.
At the same time, your attitude about yourself and your place in the world -- including what the world owes you or has or hasn't done to/for you -- will evolve. The process of giving up an addiction is actually a process of "getting." You get a positive outlook -- an outlook you likely haven't felt since you started using... if ever.
Tip #4 Change Your Playground
So much of recovery is about breaking routines as well as actual habits. I bet you've worn a groove in the route to your local liquor store or favorite bar. You know exactly where your connection lives or hangs.
If you continue to go to your old haunts, you're putting a lot of undue pressure on yourself. Why tempt fate? Take a different route home from work so you don't pass your usual supplier.
So what about your home? Obviously you'll want to cleanse your environment of anything and everything that might be a "trigger" for relapse. It's not uncommon for newly sober people to move from rehab into a transitional sober living situation to give themselves a stronger foundation before going "back there." It's usually not necessary to relocate, but it's an option if your home environment is just too toxic.
A note about smoking. Once your eyes, nose and throat become sensitized, you'll realize what others have been complaining about. It's a good idea to ban smoking in your home and car and seek out smoke-free environments to support your quitting.
Tip #5 Change Your Playmates
The decision to live without alcohol, drugs and smoking is a selfish one -- but selfish in the best possible way. It means you are serious about taking care of yourself and your health.
It also means you are going to have some weeding out to do. Some old "friends" will naturally fall by the wayside. When the main thing you have in common with someone is getting loaded, and one of you stops getting loaded, what's left? Nothing. If you're used to hanging with a hard-drinking crowd, you will suddenly notice they're not nearly as entertaining how that they're slipping into silliness and you're sober.
Believe it or not, some people may not support your new lifestyle. They may not like the "new you" and seek to sabotage your efforts. Many people don't quite understand addiction and recovery and may (even innocently) offer you your old favorite ("just one drink won't hurt you!". Actually, it can). Such people may or may not mean well. However, you can't let their ignorance or ulterior motives get under your skin.
Can you realistically "fire" every person from your old life? Obviously that's impractical. But successful people in recovery naturally gravitate away from toxic old companions and replace them with a support system of clean and sober friends.
Tip #6 Feel Your Feelings
So you've cleaned out your body and are feeling pretty good. You've cut ties with the old gang and made new friends to support you in your new life. That part's all good.
But, after numbing your feelings for years with drugs/alcohol, you've forgotten what they feel like. Re-experiencing true happiness, joy, sadness, grief, frustration -- whatever it is -- can be unnerving at first. Don't worry. You'll get used to it!
Being responsible feels good
Tip #7 Revel in Your Relationships
Tip #5 advised you to get rid of unhealthy relationships. But there will be many relationships -- family, friends, bosses, coworkers, teammates, neighbors, even strangers -- for whom the opposite is true.
As a clean/sober person, you get to "reinvent" yourself in the eyes of people you care about (and probably have hurt). Focus on being the best "you" you can be every day, being kind, helpful and generous. As you find yourself more engaged with other people, you'll discover you're much better able to deal with conflict and problems.
This is definitely an area where the "selfishness" of recovery leads to becoming more selfless.
Tip #8 Do Things -- Even Amazing Things
Think about all the energy you used to devote to your addiction. Planning, thinking about, buying, hiding, lying, using, recovering from using. That's a lot of wasted time and effort.
Take way the alcohol, drugs and smokes and you find yourself with a lot of extra time, energy and money on your hands! I bet you once had interests that you gave up (to some degree, if not totally) because of your addiction. I bet there's at least one dream you'd love to pursue.
With a clear mind and cleansed body, clean/sober people can rise to a new level of personal excellence. It's not uncommon to take up new hobbies, change careers or go back to school. On a daily basis, you'll find opportunities for accomplishment where you once found frustation and failure.
Tip #9 HALT ... and Gentle With Yourself
It's all too easy to get trapped in guilt, shame and remorse. With all these feelings flooding back, you may be tempted to feel like a failure or a bad person. You are NOT a bad person and you are anything but a failure! You are a miracle!
People overcoming addiction have escaped the clutches of a progressive, fatal illness. If you had survived cancer or a heart attack, would you beat yourself up for getting sick in the first place? Of course not.
It is important to stay in touch with your body and your feelings. If you start to feel restless, unsettled or angry with no obvious provocation, try this: H.A.L.T. It means, never let yourself get too Hungry, Angry, Lonely or Tired.
Trust me, it's much better to tend to these simple physical and emotional needs than to risk relapsing.
Another Hubber's Take on Quitting Smoking
- How to Quit Smoking: An Easy Method
Almost five months ago, I quit smoking after fifteen years as a smoker. I had tried and tried in the past to put the cigarettes down, but nothing worked. I hated the chiding that I received from family, and...
Tip #10 Celebrate Each Day, but Don't Get Cocky
Recovery is a combination of carrots and sticks. There will be days when you feel great and love life. There will be days when everything seems like a challenge to your sanity. That's perfectly normal. You're human!!
The key to living without your former crutch(es) is to recognize that both days are good for your growth in recovery. And both days are potentially dangerous -- if you don't stay vigilant.
Remember, you're dealing with a foe that's cunning, baffling, powerful, persuasive, and extraordinarily patient. You may feel you've got the tiger by the tail. But if you let down your guard even momentarily, that tiger will pounce.
Happy occasions are just as likely to invite relapse as stressful situations. But as long as you keep your guard up and don't allow yourself to be seduced into thinking you're "cured" (you're not)... you'll be fine.
Anonymous Groups
- Alcoholics Anonymous :
Alcoholics Anonymous Official Web site - Narcotics Anonymous, NA, homepage
- Nicotine Anonymous- A 12 Step Program offering support to those who want to quit cigarettes and quit
Nicotine Anonymous- A 12 Step Program offering support to those who want to quit cigarettes and quit smoking and stop other forms of tobacco and nicotine addiction. Our website offers smoking cessation support for men and woman, facts about the eff
If at First You Don't Succeed
You're definitely not alone. Very, very few people get recovery -- or quit smoking -- on their first try. Don't despair. Go back to Tip #1 and ask for help. Recommit yourself to trying again. And as they say in the rooms of AA -- keep coming back, it works!
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Comments
Mighty Mom,
Thanks for the good and workable advice.
For those who would like to read more on the subject, please also refer to the following hub I wrote last month:
How To Quit A Bad Habit
Really good Hub, as I too battle with quitting smoking, and our local Quitline Group recently 'expelled' both my Husband and I as we admitted we were still smoking a few per week. They talked to us like we were kids in front of everyone, and said we had broken our committment to quitting and cannot go back for subsidised NRT drugs such as Champix or Zyban for 6 months. I left feeling pretty annoyed, as they didn't offer to continue conselling us for that 6 months, and failed to recognise that we had been honest by saying that we had still been lapsing and having a few here and there. It would have been better to lie about it and then we could have continued to go back each week until we cracked it. Anyway, will try to achieve it without needing to go back now, as I am loathe to return to the place after how they treated us.
Wow -- great advice and a great hub. I think that changing your playground and changing your playmates is the best advice for anyone with a bad habit.
Thanks Benson. I will check out your hub. I wrote this one in response to a request (although recovery is a subject near and dear to my heart).
Pam, Misty and NY Lady, thanks for your kind words. Pretty difficult to simplify 164 pages of the Big Book of AA + 12 Steps into a 10-tips hub (while patently avoiding any mention of God or a Higher Power!).
Misty, I'm very distressed to read of your experience. Sounds like your Quitline Group is somehow tied to getting subsidized drugs and is into group humiliation - very different model than Nicotine Anonymous of other 12-Step Programs. You sound like you need a little love and props for being able to cut down on your smoking. So (((Misty and her husband))). For an uplifting experience, go to any AA or NA meeting. Addiction is addiction is addiction -- and I bet you will hear yourself (and your husband) in the stories there.
I didn't say but should have -- quitting smoking is harder than quitting drinking. And it's not a good idea to try to quit them both at the same time. Our sick little bodies can only take so much trauma at a time.
Thanks Mighty mom, but I don't think there is an NA group in Guernsey other than Quitline. (It is only a very small island). Will have to perservere with willpower I suspect :)
I chewed tobacco for 17 years (growing up on a cattle ranch, it's pretty much mandatory). I wanted to quit so bad for so many years. I can't even tell you how many full cans I threw out, deterined that "today will be the day."
It took a day of thinking I had mouth cancer to stop me finally. (I didn't have it, but I didn't know that the whole night I "discovered the tumor" on my gum, and the whole time waiting in my dentist's parking lot to literally leap on him coming to work and tell him that he WAS GOING TO SEE ME. I didn't sleep at all and I was so anxious). I was able to go cold turkey after that.
Great hub MM, your kindness is palpable here.
Umm, does it all refer to Hugpages, too? ;)
Shadesbreath, thanks for your honesty. I had a boyfriend once who had a "snuff habit." I had no idea, and that's the thing. He would go out in the back alley "with the dogs." When you're hiding what you're doing... that's abnormal and you have un problemo.
Misha, Sure thing! See "Are you a Problem Hubber." I can easily see how HubPages could become an alternate addiction for those of us so inclined.
Please also note I pointedly left out any mention of God or a Higher Power in the solution here. Not that it's not a huge part of recovery, but too big a can of worms to open in a "10 tips" hub. Besides, I tend to leave that topic to the theology pros like T. Keeley:-).
what if 12 steps don't work? you know, there's good advice here but not all shoes fit all feet. something to think about. addiction is different for the individual.
I agree annonny! I tried to make that point that different people have different paths. Addiction is different for the individual and I do know people who have been able to stay clean/sober without the 12 steps. If you are not drinking and are still miserable, however, then you need to still treat your addiction. If your brain and body are telling you to treat it with drugs/alcohol and you have no defense -- what's gonna happen? If you have a plan, a program, a support system in place to live a different life, you have a much better chance.
It's not my place to convert anyone to 12-step life. Just introduce the general topic of living without the monkey of drugs, alcohol or ciggies on your back!
Thanks again for stopping by!
While I tend to agree on cigarettes, I do believe alcohol and many drugs are demonized by government(s) for their own agenda. I would not put them all in the same basket :)
So, I do not think that living alcohol or pot free is necessarily something to strive for :)
I appreciate this Hub. Thank you for sharing these excellent points. I have been a counselor in the substance abuse treatment field for many years. Please feel free to check out my new hub, Emotional Recovery. Sincerely: Gary Eby, author and therapist.
Misha,glcoach, thanks for commenting. I will definitely check out Emotional Recovery -- GREAT topic.
Misha, I don't think our (US) government demonizes alcohol for any agenda. But the so-called "War on Drugs" is a joke. I do agree with you, living alcohol or pot free is not necessarily something to strive for. The vast majority of people who drink or even smoke recreational pot are able to enjoy their buzz/high and it's not a problem for them. There is, however a percentage of the population (10% -- qlcoach correct me if this stat is outdated) who are physically and mentally different. They are allergic to the effects of alcohol. They don't know that, so they keep trying to "get it right." This hub is only intended for those people who have reached the point where they WANT to quit but don't know how, or have tried and failed.
You are right, tho. They are not all in the same basket. If anything, cigarettes get the most government attention/money/efforts to snuff out this habit by forcing smokers to go outside, 20 to 50 feet away from buildings, not in parks, etc. What's coming next, criminalization?
LOL MM, I disagree about not demonizing alcohol.
If someone can legally join the army and kill and be killed at the age of 18, and s/he can't legally consume alcohol until s/he is 21, alcohol seems to be a bit worse thing than the death itself...
Oh, I see what you mean, Misha. I think America is pretty schizo about booze. We glamorize it and let the beer and wine companies subsidize our sports programming. But at the same time, we don't teach people to drink responsibly. That's the "demonizing" I believe you're referring to -- the effects of irresponsible drinking which are often lethal. Drinking in and of itself is not the issue. It's drinking and doing stupid things and driving.
I do agree with you about legal drinking age being 21 vs. 18. Pick one age for everything -- voting, serving in the army, and drinking. Having the age be 21 (IMO) encourages MORE underage binging and abuse. But what do I know:-)
I don't really think there should be any legal age for this, it should be left to parents' discretion. I know people will beat me for this, but this is how I think :)
Some people will definitely lash you for that opinion, Misha, LOL. Me, I think it's a very European and genteel attitude. I suspect it already is in quite a few families. Starting the kids sipping on daddy's beer or watered down wine with dinner at the tender age of 5 requires (IMO) a mature parent and a mature relationship yourself with alcohol. Starting 'em young will not turn a "normie" into an alcoholic. Nor will setting the legal drinking age to 21 prevent people who are going to become problem drinkers from becoming problem drinkers.
I do get concerned when I hear (and I do hear quite often) about middle school kids (10 and 11 year olds) who are drinking every day. They are hurting their own development.
But one thing we know: alcohol has been around since the dawn of man and isn't going away anytime soon! Slainche, as they say in my pubs:-)
MM...your piece was a winner. You reminded me of the why and wherefore of recovery...friends always. xo cw
Actually I am not advocating regular alcohol consumption for minors MM. I tend to agree that their metabolism is not suited for that, and they shouldn't be given alcohol on the regular basis.
And they usually don't demand that, too. My experience shows that if you let them try when they got interested in this - and it usually comes somewhere between 3 and 5 years - they tend to forget about alcohol till they are teens, and definitely don't demand it daily, even if parents drink casualy.
And then in teen years I think it is very important that they have parents around when they first got drunk, so parents can help, guide, and explain. And prevent anti-social behavior, if needed. Among all other things, we have to teach them how to drink :)
its realy nice staffe i liked it n i hope i ll use it n stop,
it would be nice if u add some websites about the same things so that we can read a littel bit more n stop.thank you.
what if this doesn't work?.
Really love this hub MM and have printed it out for BC, great tips x
Cabin Girl, you are a loyal and supportive crew member. BC is lucky to have you watching out for him:-)!! Hope it helps. Lots of us here on HP with firsthand experience to share, so online/offline communication always welcomed. MM
Great article....not only do you nail every crucial tip but you elaborate within each of these tips with clear and precise information. As somebody that has spent more than my fair share of time dwelling in the abyssal region not so long ago...I could not agree more with the information you have provided. Well done!
Hello Sidney, There are a few of us here on HP who know the demons intimately. You are an astute reader and nuanced writer. I look forward to getting to know you! MM
Very informative and intersting hub!
Very compassionate and well-informed. Thank you.
Lizrenee44 -- sorry I missed your comment. Thank you.
Sarah m Marie. Compassionate is a great word. Addicts deserve compassion as long as they are not actively in their disease! I know firsthand. It IS possible to live happily drug, alcohol and cigarette free. As long as you still have chocolate -- life is bearable:-). Thanks for visiting. MM
The world is more wonderful and mysterious than most of us can ever appreciate. The person addicted to alcohol or other drugs is at a particular disadvantage. Without a clear mind, only negative energies (lying cheating, etc) are readily available. Once the cloud of addiction lifts, all manner of positive possibilities present themselves. Your eighth tip captures the new world that opens up. Thanks.
Hello Alan,
Thanks so much for reading. It is truly amazing the panoramas that open up in sobriety. All that self-limiting thinking -- gone (not as simple as that, but with work it lifts). Sounds like you know this. Thanks for sharing and affirming. MM
Hello Alan,
Thanks so much for reading. It is truly amazing the panoramas that open up in sobriety. All that self-limiting thinking -- gone (not as simple as that, but with work it lifts). Sounds like you know this. Thanks for sharing and affirming. MM
Hi MM, Just to update your readers to show it can be done, I am now 9 months smoke free, (12 months in December), so never give up giving up :) As you know I have written hubs on how I managed this if anyone wants to know more.
PS. Missing you and the gang loads, but nice to see you are still posting here and there. Many others have not written hubs or posted in ages :(
That's awesome. Being smoke free is an amazing feat.
Congrats.
Yes, I miss our gang, too. Heard from Christoph today but other than that -- a lot of cool MIA hubbers!
Thanks for visting. Great as always to see you. MM
Hey you!
I was searching through the first 20 pages of hubs even worth glancing at and i came across this one. SO here is my comment: quitting smoking is EASY! You just have to commit (or BE committed for three days)! If you don't abuse alcohol on a regular basis you won't have to worry about quitting. I can't speak to drug usage. I haven't even smoked pot since the days I worked for a strip club and used to party with the strippers. it's been over 1o years at least!
Well hello back, Mr. wsp2469. First20 pages of hubs worth glancing at? WTF? Oh well. Glad you found mine.
Quitting smoking is said to be harder than quitting drugs. I believe it. But I've also heard the just doing it (like Nike) is the best way. No Nicorette, just cold turkey. It does get out of your system quickly.
If you are a "real alcoholic" trying to quit and finding that you can't is a deff clue. Many people's first clue. They know they drink too much and are shocked to find they can't stop when they try. Glad that hasn't been your experience.
Partying with the strippers, eh? Sounds like a hub should be written about that... just a thought. MM
I don't know, cutie. If i wrote an actual hub about my adventrues in the adult industry then all you ladies here but get the wrong idea. You might not recognize me for the sweet, shy, innocent white boy I really am. Still, i guess if a formal request was made I would HAVE to respond, wouldn't I? It would be my hub duty, right?
Now, now. You know better than to challenge Mighty Mom.
Besides, I sincerely doubt anyone would get an impression other than the impression you choose for us to get! That's the beauty of Hub Pages. No one knows what's really real... and what's an illusion! So I'm off to make this a formal request. Get your adjectives ready!
I don't know. I try to be honest but I don't know how exciting it will be. Seriously though, I know i play the stereotypical male card for laughs but the stripper thing might not be as exciting as you think OR it might be way too long. i have 3 years to cover, in fact. Well, we'll see. if you promise to get me some readers OR pose in that super-girl outfit I'll probably at least attwmpt to do it!
I know what you're doing. You're trying to back out. Nosir,nosir. Not ok. You promised if I asked you formally you would write a hub about your time with the strippers.
If it's that long of a period perhaps it needs to be serialized (part I and part II). But probably only hit the highlights. Or perhaps lowlights, depending on your point of view.
You know I will pose for you anytime in my Supergirl outfit!!
Damn, girl. You know one of these days you're gonna get me so worked up you're gonna wish we WEREN'T lving in the same state! i willdo it. I promise!
you put a lot of effort into this hub and i really appreciate, every word you wrote, thanks a lot
Hi poetlorraine,
Thanks for visiting. If my words can help you or someone in your life I am happy. We are all in this recovery thing together! Wishing you a happy, joyous and free day. MM
Great hub packed full of really useful information, I have tried and subsequently failed to quit smoking many times however your hub has given me some great new ideas before I try again. Looking forward to reading more of your work in the future.
Hello wrenfrost56. I love your avatar -- great sword! I wish you all the best in quitting smoking. It is definitely doable.I know several people who have managed to give up that deadly habit. And are glad they did! Good luck. MM
I likes your hub page it's really great infomration about of quit smoking..
Thank you for posting this. These are helpful practical and doable steps that can indeed help!
Thank you green light! I know many people who have used them and yes, they do work. Not that easy to do, but soooo worth it.























pgrundy says:
14 months ago
Great hub! I think #6 doesn't get as much attention as it deserves--thank you for including it. I recently lost about 20 pounds and found that as the weight came off I began to feel incredibly angry. Slowly it dawned on me that I had literally been 'stuffing' my feelings, and once the stuffing stopped, out they came.
So now I'm dealing with that, but I'll get through it. This is all fabulous advice, thank you.
Also--for anyone scared to go to an AA meeting, it works. Seven years sober now and loving every minute of it.