In a culture that idolizes and promotes food as instant gratification, it's no surprise that obesity is out of control. We swim upstream against an overwhelming current of continuous media messages that implore us to, "eat, eat, and eat!"—and then to eat some more. No wonder so many dieters fail, or fail to maintain their weight after losing pounds. If you're one of those frustrated dieters, it's time to stop "dieting" and start "diet-sizing."

"Diet-sizing" is what I call the simple habits that enable you to lose weight gradually and keep it off. It's about developing a routine of sensible eating and moderate exercise tailored to fit you—one you can comfortably live with for the rest of your life.

Here are ten tips for helping to develop a diet-sizing plan right for you. I implemented and refined these ideas while losing 40 pounds in five months—and most importantly, while maintaining my target weight of 155 to 160 pounds for the past five years. Not only do I look and feel younger, I've also significantly reduced my cholesterol and blood pressure to the point that I've been able to discontinue medications.

1. Get your motivation into gear.

You will not lose weight until you have decided to change your eating and exercise habits permanently. If you have not made that decision, or if you are not convinced you can stick with it, stop reading now and only come back when you know in your heart that you are committed and ready to pursue permanent change.

2. Determine your recommended daily calorie requirement.

You need this number, which should include carbohydrate, protein and fat calories, because your ultimate objective in losing weight is to burn more calories than you consume through either diet, exercise, or preferably, both
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To find out your caloric targets for weight loss or maintenance according to your age, weight, height and level of physical activity, use a simple calculator you can readily find on-line by searching under "calorie counter" or similar terminology. A calculator will tell you the number of calories you need in order to lose a specific number of pounds per week or to maintain a particular weight.

3. Set realistic weight-loss goals.

This is critical! Nothing feeds weight loss and dietary change like success. If you are not realistic in setting your goals and you can't fulfill your weight loss or weight control expectations, you will defeat your resolve.

On the other hand, a realistic weight-loss target will generate great positive reinforcement for you. For instance, if you want to lose twenty pounds, that probably is realistic--but not if you want to do it in a week or two. Six weeks or two months, or even longer, is a much more realistic time frame. And the satisfaction and reward of losing even a pound or two a week during that time will fortify your long-term determination in amazing ways.

4. Trim dietary fat.

Mercilessly slash all "bad" fat (saturated fat and trans fat) from your diet, and manage your intake of "good" fat. Choose fat-free or reduced-fat foods of all kinds, along with more fresh vegetables and fruit. Eat less red meat and a lot more fish and chicken (with skin removed).

I know what you're thinking: there goes flavor. Not true. The flavor of fat-free or reduced-fat products doesn't suffer nearly as much as you might think. Most of such foods that I enjoy—everything from yogurt to milk to ice cream and much more—have vastly improved in taste over the past several years. The little flavor enjoyment you might give up is more than rewarded with a tremendous decrease in calories—especially the fat calories that quickly ring up added pounds.

When you grocery shop, read the nutrition labels on everything you buy. In addition to choosing food products that are stingy in fat and fat calories, you can sort out foods high in excess salt and other nasty additives. Personally, I buy no processed foods of any kind, because they more often than not have more of every kind of ingredient that promotes weight gain.

There are diets that tell you to eat certain foods, when to eat them and in what quantity. Maybe that works, maybe it doesn't. My suggestion is to find the healthy foods that you like, and then eat in moderation. It's easier, cheaper, less hassle—and I think a lot more enjoyable. Remember, diet-sizing is forever, not just for a week or a month.

5. Reduce your food intake.

Regardless of what you eat, whether it is more or less healthy, less food means fewer calories. Eat only until you feel full, then stop! Reducing food intake requires will power. But stick with it. In a relatively short time, you will actually shrink your appetite (see Tip #10 below).

6. Along with eating less each day, eat more often.

Eat a minimum of five times a day. Eating actually increases your metabolic rate—the speed at which you burn calories. You can find good information about metabolism and weight loss on-line by searching under "metabolism weight loss" or similar terminology.

And whatever you do, don't ever skip breakfast. The first meal of the day jump-starts your metabolism. Keep it going with a healthy mid-morning snack, then a light lunch, a mid-afternoon snack, and finally a light supper. You can have a very light snack after supper. Just don't overdo it.

7. Exercise!

Get at least 30 minutes of light to moderate exercise at least three times a week—and more often if you have the time and opportunity. Walk, run, lift weights, play racquetball, basketball, volleyball or tennis, golf or swim. It doesn't matter. What counts is the calorie-burning effort of physical activity.

And don't believe the "no pain - no gain!" claim. It's a myth. You don't need to exhaust your physical or mental endurance to lose weight and improve your fitness. Just get active, get your heart rate up, and the pounds will come off.

When I started diet-sizing five years ago, I chose walking. Since then, I've walked probably thousands of miles. These days, I walk five or six times a week for at least an hour a day. I've also added some light weightlifting to my exercise routine for variety.

Whatever exercise you choose, stick with it. Make it a way of life.

8. Put the bathroom scale away.

Most people want to lose a lot of weight right away. Again, the problem is our lust for instant gratification. But that impulse is completely counterproductive to diet-sizing. Weight loss comes gradually, even very slowly at times. Hopping on the scale once a day, or even once a week, can be a self-defeating strategy if you don't see the results you expect.

Don't weigh yourself more than once every couple of weeks. Consider that losing even a pound or a half-pound in two weeks is progress. Remember, diet-sizing is for the rest of your life. Unless you are morbidly obese (in which case you probably should be following a doctor's advice), you can probably afford to be patient about the speed at which you lose weight. And of course, there's always a chance that you will be pleasantly surprised at a greater weight loss than you anticipated.

9. Eat in, not out.

Over the past twenty years, we've all become accustomed to the convenience and variety of eating out multiple times each week. But the trend also is a prime driver of our country's burgeoning obesity problem. Restaurant and fast-food meals have grown larger in volume and richer in fat calories and carbohydrates—to say nothing of more expensive. Save calories and money by eating at home. Yes, cooking at home takes a little more time. But that's a worthwhile investment when the benefits are losing weight and saving money.

If you have to eat out more than once in a while, choose the healthiest, lowest-calorie-and-fat items on the menu. Some restaurants do a good job with such items. Forsake the burger and fries for a salad with reduced-fat dressing, for example.

On the other hand, man does not have to live by home-prepared meals alone. From time to time (but not too often), it's okay to indulge yourself in your favorite restaurant or even fast-food meal. An occasional restaurant meal won't knock you off the wagon, or cause you to gain weight.

10. Read the health and wellness sections of your favorite mass media.

You will find valuable information and insight that will help you to fine-tune your personal dietary lifestyle to the way you want to live it, and in ways that are healthiest.

For example the "Personal Journal" section of the April 14, 2009 Wall Street Journal described research indicating that eating certain foods makes it harder to stop eating. Bread, sweets, juice, pasta, wine or beer before dinner and artificial sweeteners have all been fingered as promoting "fullness resistance." Eating them, even in limited quantities, can make you feel hungrier, tempting you to eat more. That's good knowledge to take into account when you're losing or maintaining your weight.

Then, as the saying goes, just do it. If you have pounds waiting to be shed, today is the perfect time to start.