Just when you think your life is improving. You are moving forward at a slow steady pace. I knew that eventually chaos would re-enter my life. It's not the kind of chaos that you can see on the outside, it's the chaos that stays on the inside.

How do you react when you realize that you have spent a large part of your life with a liar and a thief? That, my friends, is a harsh reality. It is hard when you spent a lot of time defending a person, only to find out later that they really are a thief. The liar part isn't so bad of a reality, but I should have known that you don't get one without having the other.

I raised my kids around that! How could I have been so blind? How could I have not listened to anyone that tried to tell me? I thought maybe I got out of it with my life in tact. Now I am wondering. Did I really? Is this just more damage that I must overcome?

I feel like an idiot and a fool. I am angry and hurt all at the same time. I want to cry, but I can't. I want to scream, but it wouldn't do any good. I guess I will just pick up these pieces and try to put them back together again.

I will only trust those with a proven track record. There aren't many people that will have my trust. I will make sure that they know who they are. As for the rest of the world, my trust will stay in my pocket until it is earned. I won't go through this again. It just hurts too much.

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