My Life in 2006

Many times in our lives we fail to see the big picture of things. I am just as guilty of not paying attention as anyone else is. As the year 2006 was progressing along, it was filled with uncertainties, worries and unhappiness. I found myself wondering everyday if I would survive another day, another week or another month. It wasn't until the beginning of a new year that I took a real look at the previous year.

At the beginning of the year, my life was in a total shamble. My marriage was failing and my whole world was full of stress. I made a new friend in February, and it was so nice to have someone to understand me. I just kept doing what I had to do from day to day. Things began to improve for me as time went on.

My mind was made up as to what to do with my life. I decided that after my last child graduated high school at the end of that semester, I would move home. I was focused on what I needed to do, and somewhat scatter brained all at the same time. I had hoped that three of my children there would have moved with me. Only time would tell what would happen and who would come with me.

My oldest daughter got married to a really good man. The wedding was small, simple and elegant. I was so proud of her for the choice she made, and I was tickled to have a new son-in-law. That was pretty terrific! A little more than a week later, she called me to tell me that I was going to be a grandma! I found myself asking, "Can this get any better?"

My youngest daughter graduated in good shape in May. I made my move home in June. Only one of my children came with me, with another to follow in a few months. That was the plan, but it just didn't work that way. I put all I could into my car, shed many tears, hugged my two grand daughters goodbye and drove away from a life of 25 years. I knew it was the right thing for me, but I couldn't figure out why it had to be so hard to do.

I had a job lined up when I moved home, but it fell through. My youngest daughter was with me, and that was wonderful! My mom was so glad I was home again. Within the next two months, my daughter decided she needed to go back and try to make it on her own. She was so young, but brave and solid in her decision. I was still in contact with my friend and we began to talk on the phone. I got constant encouragement on a daily basis.

My youngest had set a date to return to the only place she knew as home, we booked flights, and went. I was driving back with my third daughter and my two grand daughters. It was hard again to say goodbye to my girls, but we left teary eyed. It is August now, and I had no idea where my life was going next. I had my grandchildren for almost two months. They are such a joy!

I had lost all direction in my life. I knew I had to get re-focused on my life and I needed to do it soon. I was spinning out of control again. It felt just like the beginning of the year. I didn't like the feeling, but with my mom and my friend, I was able to catch hold again. I had walked away from a 22 year marriage, a job and my kids. Would I ever really live?

I was given an opportunity to leave town for a couple of days to meet my friend face to face. I was nervous and excited at the same time. I packed my bag, and got on a plane. It was great to be able to see the face whose voice had been so supportive of me for so long. It was one of the best decisions I had made in a long time. I took a risk, and I will never have any regrets.

My second daughter came here and picked up her girls. It was so hard to watch them drive away, but it was best for them. They needed their mom and she needed them, so I had to let go again. I did that, and I cried a lot sometimes just quietly inside and rarely where anyone could see me. Once again, what was I going to do with my life? That resounding question just kept coming back again and again.

It's November now, and my youngest daughter called. "Mom, he asked me to marry him, and I said yes!" It seemed like just the other day, she was in pigtails and running in the yard, and now she is getting married. I was so excited for her! She was marrying someone she had known for a couple of years and he is so good to her.

All of my girls came home for Christmas. It was the first time in five years they were all together. It was a memorable time for all of us. From the 18th of December to the 28th of December, the events that took place were all wonderful. Remember the oldest daughter was pregnant? She gave birth to a beautiful little girl on the 18th! My youngest daughter was married on the 23rd, and my second daughter had a birthday on the 27th. A very exciting week!

So now, looking back at the year 2006, it was filled with so much good and wonderful things, how could I possibly wish for anything more? I got out of a failing marriage, gained two son-in-laws, a new grand daughter and I still have my exquisite friend. My life has begun to take a turn for the better now. I still worry about things, but not what will happen to me. I will be just fine. I count my blessings everyday to have the family that I have. For me, the year 2006 was a phenomenal one! It's nice to look back at the big picture and see so much love and happiness that is there.