It was 1973. CBS ruled Saturday night television. At 8:00 pm Caroll O'Connor starred in All in the Family followed by M*A*S*H then the Mary Tyler Moore Show and finally The Bob Newhart Show. My favorite show came on at 10:00 pm. "We're so glad we have this time together". The intro music for the Carol Burnett Show. It was now 10:00 pm and my brothers and sister would be asleep. My mom and I would watch for the next hour as the cast from the Carol Burnett show would keep us laughing. I do believe that the funniest part of the show was Tim Conway breaking up Harvey Korman. Watching Harvey Korman trying to keep a straight face made the rest of the cast laugh too.

There was only one television in my home back then. No cable either. We had three channels to choose from. Didn't like what was on channel 4? Try channel 5. Maybe channel 7. That was pretty much it. Unless of course you were a fan of Creature Double Feature which aired on the UHF channel. There were 2 UHF channels. Boston Bruins aired on channel 38. Now UPN38 on cable. Channel 38 was WSBK. There was one show I would watch on WSBK. Every Sunday morning the Three Stooges would air for an hour. Three twenty minute episodes. My brother and I would watch the antics of Moe, Larry and Curly being plumbers or painters or cooks. "This house sure gone crazy". If you remember the man that said that line was a black cook in a kitchen with water coming out of the gas burners on the stove.

Now we have over 200 channels to choose from. Still, no Carol Burnett show though. Nothing even similar. MTV came along in the early 1980's. That was a fun network when they actually showed music videos. Now it's mostly reality television. Real World? Yeah right. If watching a bunch of alcohol induced nitwits is your idea of great television then you should be happy with MTV's programming. VH1 maybe? Not for me. I stopped watching when Flavor Flav hooked up with Bridgette Neilsen. Damn, Bridgette sure didn't age well.

Then there's the original networks. ABC, NBC and CBS. About the only show in my book worth watching is Two and a Half Men. My favorite character is Berta. If you remember Berta (played by Melanie Linskey) was on another 70's television show. Hot'l Baltimore. She was the same smart ass woman she is now. Only thing is Berta can say almost anything she wants on CBS. Gone are the days of shows that my brother and I would watch. Fun carefree shows that weren't all about sex and drugs and booze. F Troopwith Larry Storch as Agarn is a classic. "I don't know why every one says you're so dumb Agarn" Fifteen minutes later during the show a light bulb would go off over Agarn's head. "Who says I'm dumb". Too funny. There were lots of great shows. These shows spawned so many stars of today's movies. Streets of San Francisco. Hawaii 5-0. Book em Danno. Jack Lord's hair is legendary. One of the things I always noticed was that the role of Chin Ho on 5-0 was played by actor Kam Fong. Why did they even have to change Kam's name to Chin? I think Kam Fong would have been a great name. How about with Graham Kerr as the Galloping Gourmet. My mother watched that show all the time. "Lets add a little sherry". Graham looked like he may have been able to drink a bit, but not like Julia Child. Later portrayed by Dan Akroyd in another great Saturday Night television show Saturday Night Live. How many movie stars got their start from SNL? I can name em here but the list would be pretty long.

Merv Griffin ruled the day time television networks back in the 70's. Mike Douglas has a show. I still remember the day they wheeled Mike Douglas off the set. His appendix burst in the middle of the show.

Mason Reese was coining the term Shmorgasbord. Rodney Allen Rippy had a show. Whatever happened to Rodney? The Hudson Brothers had an hour long show. Bugs Bunny/Road Runner hour. My stepfather and I would sit and watch the Road Runner drive Wyle E Coyote insane. There were local television shows too. Boomtown, Bozo, Captain Bob. Now we have the Shamwow guy (look for him on Smoking Gun.com) and all kinds of other infomercials trying to sell us crap we don't need. Sorry Billy Mays. I don't want any of the stuff you were pitching. RIP.

So many shows that actually made you laugh and have fun in the 70's. Now we have network television showing us cut throat cheats, liars and tax evaders. Who cares who Brett Michaels is having sex with. The Bachelorette? She seems so shallow to me. The Bachelor? Not in my house please. I'd rather watch Emerill on the Food Network. I look back at shows like Carol Burnett and remember how much fun it was to sit around the one television we had in our den. Home made hot buttered popcorn. Grape of orange Zarex. I wonder if television actually kept my family closer back in those days. We watched the shows together. The whole family in one room. No X-Box. No Playstation 3. No internet. Tonight when I go home my teenage son will be playing X-Box. My younger son will want to watch SpongeBob. There are seven televisions in my house now. That means that instead of us all sitting around watching the same show. We'll be spread out in 3 different rooms. I do like one network. History Channel. The kids find it boring. They'll want Family Guy. Oh yeah. Family Guy. It is a great show. Definitely not for the entire family though. TBS plays it for 2 straight hours on Monday and Tuesday nights. Just goes to show the need for some original and good programming. If TBS has to play Family Guy for 4 hours in two nights, well that just says it all. I do Dream Of Jeannie. Giggidy.