The truth is that its not very difficult to entice, woo and even trick people into doing what you want. The following set of tools is used all day every day by folks working in everything from sales to politics, from education to banking.

Learn these techniques and you'll not only get more of what you want, you'll spend less time being manipulated by others.

#1 Set the Agenda: He who creates the schedule gets what he wants. When you are working with a team to deliver a presentation, or planning a vacation with extended family, make sure you're the one who creates the list of things you are going to do. Put the stuff you want to do first thing in the morning. Put the stuff you don't want to do after lunch or just before its time to go home. This works for the Speaker of the House in Congress, it will work for you as well.

#2 List the Pros and Not the Cons: When you are trying to talk someone into something, make a list of pros and cons. Do the Con list first and write down what your "target" says. Do the Pro list and write down what you both say. The Pro list will always be longer.

#3 The Guy with the Pen Wins: In meeting and presentations, be the guy standing up and writing on the whiteboard. Always. Write down what you agree with. Do not write down what you do not agree with unless you are actively forced to. This will make it appear as if everything you agree with is "accepted" by the group, and everything you don't agree with is still open for debate. If there is a report to be written after a meeting or presentation, be the guy who creates the report and follow the same rules.

#4 Subdivide and Conquer: Families, companies, political parties all suffer from the same problem. Too many folks who think they are entitled to an opinion. To solve this problem give folks a voice but not where it counts. Meet in a large group to "discuss and evaluate". Meet in small groups to make decisions and spend money. When people catch on, let them join one or more small groups . . . but not the ones that count.

#5 Control the Purse Strings: The guy with the money calls the shots. Most groups of every kind are under funded. Investing a little of your own money can insure that your ideas are funded, and you get the free labor of others in the group to execute your plans. Establishing your financial control over an organization early, by providing an initial investment, gives you control over more resources when the organization gets more funding.

#6 Be the first to take action: Group activities are frustrating and time consuming. People get into groups to do stuff. So be the first to take action and you'll find people will usually fall in line. This works particularly well if you have a small number of "confederates" in the group who will follow your lead early.

#7 Avoid argument: If you discuss meaningful things decisions about those things are likely to get made. The more heated the discussion, the stronger the emotions, the more likely decisions will be made. So do not argue with people, placate them. Then carry on doing whatever you had in mind. Find ways to agree with almost everyone, and put time, money and effort into plans that take things in a direction you want to go. Open conflict just draws attention to you and your objectives.

If you take a look at these tricks you'll see they are used all day every day by the people you work for, the folks running your government, the administrators running your school, and even members of your own family.

Even if you decide you don't want to use these techniques to manipulate the folks you know and love, you'll find knowing them makes it easier to avoid being shoved around by others.