Break-ups can be very difficult and a lot of people turn to bizarre habits to compensate for their lost connection to that special someone. Here are a few healthy things you can do to get through those hard times. You can keep your dignity and avoid and prostituting your self esteem for way below its market value. Enjoy!

Itinerary (what you will need): 5 kegs, 5 liters hard liquor, your favorite music, 8 Somalian pirates, money, an active Facebook or Myspace Account (Depending on how sketchy you intend to be) , a bed, a hacksaw and a trained stunt double.

1. Reclaim your favorite songs. You may have said the dreaded "this is our song" phrase, turning a once loved song into a bed of cold sweat and night shivers. Reclaim these songs! They are rightfully yours, you downloaded them!

2.Recruit new friends and get back old ones. You've no doubt been a "douchebag" and alienated most of your old friends. In some cases, be prepared to pay money to get some of them back. Studies have shown it takes 3-6 drinks to purchase a new friend and 12-13 to buy back old ones; so spend wisely!

4. Play more sports! Get involved in pick up soccer, coed softball or join an outdoor beer pong league. It is very likely your former 2-3 nights a week exercise plan just walked out the door.

5. Have a break up or divorce party to celebrate your freedom. Then take all the items that they left you and build a massive bonfire. Report it to the fire department and blame them.

6. Buy a smaller bed! Go from a king size bed to a twin bed. The illusion of loneliness is decreased by about 17.34% for every 5 square inches smaller your bed gets. Ideally you should sleep on a 5 x 9 piece of wood for optimum loneliness reduction. You can use a hacksaw to perform this task.

7. De-facebook your Ex. Unless of course you want an up to the minute invasive automated commentary about everything they are doing. I mean do you really want to know if she added Harry Potter to her favorite books or if she turned Buddhist?

8. Send your Ex tickets for an all expenses paid boat cruise along the northern African peninsula. Then have the Somalian pirates, which you should have on hand, kidnap them and hold them for ransom for 3 days. It will be on CNN. You can record and play it every time you feel down.

9. Date a significantly less attractive person than your Ex, then when you are in public pretend as if they are God's gift to mankind. If you cant handle dating the significantly less attractive person, you may find it easier to use a stunt double, as suggested in the itinerary above.

10. Effectively use slander and/or libel. Go to the place she works and hang up photos of her. Above and below the photo should read "Wanted for Arson". If she sees you doing this pretend to be someone official on official an official office errand.