Good morning breakfastpoppers. Today is Monday, August 17, 2009. This morning's recipe calls for a very hearty, stick to your ribs cereal. Today is a great day to write an open letter to everyone in Washington and we are going to need our strength. If you care to join me you will need 2/3 cup oatmeal, 2 ounces of raisins, 2 ounces of cut-up, dried apricot, 1 or 2 diced apples, 2 bananas, grape nuts and an english muffin. Cook the oatmeal together with the raisins, apricots and apples. Top with the bananas and pour grape nuts on top. Butter up the muffin and enjoy!

This meal will keep you going throughout the day and possibly through tomorrow. It really is quite deceiving, because although it looks like a bowl of cereal it is really so much more.

Let's write our Monday morning letter to Washington. The cereal has inspired me.

Dear Mr. President, Speaker Pelosi, Harry Reid and all other fellow Democrats that have been irritating most of us on a consistent basis ever since you arrived in Washington.

This Monday morning, it would appear that the people you characterized as astroturf, rabble-rousing phony malcontents have won a victory of sorts. You, Mr. President, have indicated that the Public Option in health care was just a small part of your reform. I, personally, find this very funny and disingenuous because a single payor government run plan was central to Obamacare. Having said that, you now are calling for the government run plan to be replaced by health care cooperatives. Sounds different, sounds not so threatening, but what are you really talking about?

Is it possible that the co-op system is really a public plan in disguise? Could the co-ops resemble a harsher version of HMO's that would cripple our ability to have access to doctors of our choosing? Could very well be.

Here is what I propose. Go to the Congressional meeting rooms where you toil away writing impossibly ridiculous wordy bills and throw them away. Don't save a single scrap of paper, not a one.

Call a meeting, bright and early at 9:00 a.m. and start over, from scratch. Keep it simple, and straightforward. Explain from the outset what a co-op really is. Who runs this co-op? Is it the consumer? What role does government play in its inception and in its delivery? Keep the language simple. Forget all the diversionary tactics like references to paragraph a, section 4,007 on page 200, sub chapter 21. We are on to your tricks and this go around we won't tolerate any.

When you write something, give a clear no-nonsense definition of what you are talking about.

Make it so clear that should the beloved E.T. decide to pay us a visit with a desire to read the bill, he would have no trouble "calling home" and explaining it in detail.

Keep in mind throughout this process that we, the astro-turf malcontents, will be watching you very closely. We really have gotten quite good at seeing through your chicanery and we aren't shy about bringing it to your attention.

One very important thing, slow down and take your time. Get it right this time and keep it honest. If these co-ops are just another avenue toward a single payor government plan we will find out and we will defeat you.

One other thing, you really need to tell Press Secretary Gibbs to tone down his nasty retorts and to try to be more professional. I find him really annoying to listen to. He's snide, dismissive, insulting and rude. It would really be great if more of the press corps would be brave enough to point this out to him, but apparently they are all still living in the land of la-la. Every once in a while someone challenges Gibbs, like Major Garrett and it truly is inspiring to see.

Speaker Pelosi, apparently it wasn't so long ago in our national history that you found protesters to be quite inspiring. Why the change of heart? Flip-flopping is really very unflattering behavior. Please try to keep it under control because it reflects very poorly upon you. Oh, one more thing, woman to woman, enough with the botox. You are starting to resemble a puppet that should be on a ventriloquist's knee. If iI have offended you, I'm sorry. I'm just trying to help.

In closing, I would just like to say that, thus far, you all have put on a very embarrassing imitation of people trying to run a government. Go back to the drawing board, read the Constitution, take a Lexapro and buckle down.

Very truly yours,

...POP...