Do you ever get the feeling that the majority of techno whiz-kids are male? I do. You have only to look at the new gadgets and gizmos making it to the market on daily basis to see it. New cars declaring ‘advanced engineering’ (meaning it goes faster and had more gadgets) very rarely talk about ‘non-jigging seats’ so you can slick your lippy on neatly without smudging it across your face because you’re late as usual!’

Agreed that technology comes up with a cool new gizmo or invention every day and today we have antibacterial shirts that also oxidize pollutants and health monitors that take down all your vital measurements and send them across to your physician via the internet (all on its own!). If these don’t make you go “wow!”, then check out the “brainy bras” that tighten straps and cup support according to the level of physical activity and also monitor heart rate; “sneaky shoes” that can sense the relationship between running speed and weight distribution and automatically adjust their cushioning accordingly; “talking tights” that tell you when to go easy on your workout so that you don’t injure yourself and “thermostat clothing” that keeps you warm only where it want it to and cools sweat prone areas like your armpits! Nevertheless, we are human and a progressive (read “greedy”) species. Do these new wonders on the block stop us from vying for more? Here are some cool ideas that practically every new-age woman’s dreams are made up of and we’ll worship anyone (adroit or idiot) who brings them to life.

“Lizard tail lipstick”: remember that precious glossy that your aunt got you from abroad and how you used it only on “very special occasions” lest it finished off? Wouldn’t it be god-sent if that lipstick grew by itself every time you slicked it on? The technology (whenever it’s born) can also be applied on perfumes and lotions. The only flip side is that it would send the cosmetic industry to doldrums.

“Adipose burning yummies”: Now what on earth could possibly beat a bag of chips, a bar of dark, creamy, sinful chocolate and a cheesy cheese pizza with extra cheese? Answer: a bag of chips, a bar of dark sinful chocolate and a cheesy cheese pizza with extra cheese with negative calories! Imagine yourself sitting in front of the television, hogging upon your favourite snack and burning equivalent amount of calories without batting an eyelid! Sounds like a dream, eh?

If the above mentioned idea doesn’t work out, how about a “magic pill” that you pop before going to bed and wake up “36-24-36” and sans all cellulite (and side effects)? Well, that wouldn’t hurt either!

“The 24 hour nappy”: this one’s for new moms. No more waking up all groggy at inhumanly hours to handle poop filled nappies, cleaning baby bums and feeding the baby so that it poops all over again. The “24-hour nappy” would make all the baby excreta just er….disappear (or more realistically, get absorbed in some deeper layers for the entire day) making baby happy and you happier! And what if an automatic feeding device comes free with it?

“Instant periods”: no woman really looks forward to ‘that time of the month’ and when we can have instant noodles and instant coffee, why not this? Only if someone could come up with something that would make all the mess and trauma get over within a few minutes, every female on earth would scream “yay!” that would mean a final adieu to cramps, PMS and mood swings.

“Money Plant”: no, not the one hanging in your bathroom in a fused bulb! A household plant that grows bucks for fruits would be every plant hater’s delight. Okay, so it would throw up world economy, but who cares! At least it would motivate people to plant greens, bring them closer to nature and combat the greenhouse effect!

If Robots design and build computers and cars so why not have one to do the ironing?. Not only are men too lazy to do much housework and never the ironing, when they do attempt it, delicate lace blouses and the best Saturday night togs are clearly going to end up in the next charity bag. There’s a sneaking suspicion that men are deliberately bad at this task so as to get out of it; but then, could you risk it?’

And finally, a “Trained Clone” to do all your multi-tasking while you zoom off to an exotic locale and chill out on a beach with your margarita! We are not asking for too much, are we?