If you have ever written a novel, you probably divided the plot events into chapters. Within those chapters were episodes, smaller parts of a larger plot section.

The autobiography you are living now--(auto--self; bio--life; graphy--writing) has episodes and chapters, too. Recognizing them when they occur helps you put the plot stream of your life into perspective. Two key benefits come out of this:

• Recognizing when a major chapter begins
• Recognizing when a major chapter is ending or has ended--so that you can prepare for a new chapter
• Recognizing that an "episode" in your life is not the entire chapter; it's just a part of it.

Here's an example of a chapter:Your high school years. Within that major chapter are episodes relating to classroom experiences, sports team experiences, clubs you joined, dating during that period, achieving a major goal such as completion of a class project.

Here's an example of not letting a chapter end: that buddy of yours, who is now in his mid-30s, who can't stop talking about the winning touchdown he scored for the high school team when he was a junior. (When he brings up the topic repeatedly, you think to yourself, 'So what are you doing in your life NOW?)

Another example of an unrecognized ended chapter is the one in which you break up with a significant romantic partner but you keep trying to revive the situation for months and even years. You don't hear the friends who keep telling you, "Let him go" or "Let her go. It's OVER."

Beginning a new chapter can occur when you change careers or you move to another city or country or you marry. The unknown can always be a bit scary because it's just that: the unknown. But new chapters teach us new things and help us grow.

Let's say you're starting a new job in a new career field. The "episodes" might involve:

• Getting accustomed to your new boss
• Learning all the ins and outs of the new business you are part of
• Your first major achievement
• Earning a promotion or a raise in salary

When you become a parent for the first time, (the beginning of a new chapter), episodes you can expect to deal with involve:

• learning how to care for a baby
• pre-school years
• elementary school (which has a cluster of sub-episodes)
• middle school
• high school
• college

WHAT'S THE POINT OF CHAPTERS AND EPISODES?

Some people take in oxygen and give out carbon dioxide. That's about as deep as their life is. But others ask themselves, "Where have I been? Where am I going? What has been the effect on me of things that have happened to me?"

If you're one of those who asks the quiet question, "What's going on in my life?", then the tool of organizing your biography into chapters and episodes gives you a way of interpreting your life story.

If you're experiencing tough times financially, but you know that, over time, you will get back on your feet again, you know that the Hard Times Chapter will not last forever. That awareness can help you endure the tough times.

If you've been diagnosed with a serious illness, let me share a tip with you--from my own personal experience. Take one episode at a time. Don't let your mind try to stretch to the eventual conclusion of the Major Illness Chapter. The reason is that a major illness--with its tests, biopsies, surgery, recovery--gives you all you can handle one day at a time.

During the daily "episodes" of such a serious chapter, work on any sources of humor and warmth that you can find--friends who make you laugh, friends who stay positive, friends who show you by example that they are there for you.

I have known people who felt that their most significant achievements occurred 20 or 30 years ago. That's sad. We may change jobs or priorities or locations, but we're healthier emotionally if we look for new challenges, new achievements in each chapter.

When you are the guest of honor at your funeral, there are no more chapters to be written (other than your legacy and lasting influence on others). So the more understanding you have of "what's going on in my life" as you live it, the more opportunities you have to make the Next Chapter the best one ever.