Adoption

Nothing may be as rewarding as adopting a child. You are not only helping a child find a good home. You are helping to raise that child. You are agreeing to give that child the love and support he/she needs to grow into an adult.

As you may realize, parenthood is a big responsibility. Being an adopted parent may even be a bigger responsibility.

You have to consider many aspects before you take on the responsibility of becoming a mother or father to a foster child. You must realize what a shattering impact it would have on the child if the situation does not work out and the child has to find, yet another home. This is the main reason you need to stop and think. You need to think of many aspects and many possible things that can occur.

Here is a brief summary of things you should think about once that wonderful idea of adopting has entered your mind.

DO YOU HAVE ROOM IN YOUR HOME FOR SAID CHILD?

The state will expect you to have not only a bed for this child, but also a room.

If there is a child of the same sex in the home, the newly adopted child may share this room. Yet, they each have to have their own bed (real bed, no daybeds). They each also have to have their own separate places for their belongings (closets and or dressers).

DO YOU HAVE ENOUGH MONEY TO SUPPORT SAID CHILD?

Sometimes the state will help you, especially if the child is all ready receiving a subsidiary of some sort.

If you are fostering to adopt, you will generally receive a subsidiary until the adoption is final.

CAN YOU AFFORD THE ADOPTION FEES?

Private adoptions are expensive. You have many fees to pay such as court costs, agency fees, etc. This can and will run into thousands of dollars.

If you wish to adopt outside of the United Sates, the prices goes up considerably.

You can contact your state or local Children's agency and learn more about their foster to adopt programs. When you use a public agency, adoption may take longer. Yet, you will not have to pay the court fees.

CAN YOU HANDLE THE CHILD'S MENTAL AND PHYSICAL NEEDS?

Many children who are eligible for adoption are adoptable because they have been victims of neglect and or abuse. This means they come with physical and emotional scars.

Can you handle their needs.

WILL THE OTHER CHILDREN IN THE HOME HANDLE THE SUDDEN APPEARANCE OF ANOTHER CHILD

Yes, your current children may love the idea of having another brother or sister. Yet, in real life their can be jealousy issues.

Can you handle it?

WILL YOUR WORKLOAD GIVE YOU ENOUGH ROOM TO RAISE A CHILD?

Most of us are busy. Will your schedule give you the time that you will need for the child?

CAN YOU SHARE THE CHILD WITH OTHERS?

Many children who are being adopted wants to spend time with their real siblings, past foster parents or even their grandparents? These past relationships are important to them and if ties are cut the child could face emotional harm.

Can you handle such ties? Will you become jealous?

CAN YOU HANDLE EMOTIONAL OUTBURSTS, NIGHTMARES, ETC?

Many children who have been neglected or abused will act out. Will have emotional outburst for no apparent reason. Some even suffer from bad nightmares?

Could your nerves handle such problems?

CAN YOU REACH OUT FOR HELP WHEN NEEDED?

Many families need help on occasion. When you adopt a child, many factors could come into play. If the situation becomes hard could you ask for help from a counselor or someone from the agency?

This is very important because we can't do it all and we don't know it all. Being able to talk to someone who might help us and help give us ideas on how to approach the situation is not only in the child's best interest, but in the best interest of any adopted parent.

Of course, there are many factors you should consider when it comes to adopting a child. Could you be a good adopted parent? The above questions may give a better clue on how to answer that. As will as the last question and maybe the most important question of all:

DO YOU LOVE CHILDREN AND CAN YOU GIVE THEM PATIENCE AS WELL AS LOVE THEY NEED?