Try to remember the last phenomenal person you got a chance to meet. It may have happened at a party, or work, or randomly when you were taking a bus to your destination. Your conversation with that person might have been long and deep, or it could have been very short, but most likely within the very first 3 minutes that person already earned your admiration and respect.

A large part of my job is to work and communicate with people. I meet and engage in conversation hundreds of new people every day, and I've come to appreciate those people that are charismatic They leave me with a feeling that they have enjoyed talking to me, and I reciprocate that feeling. I respect them for who they are and would be happy to talk with them again, introduce them to my friends and even grant them small favors just because I like them!

Naturally I wanted to know if they were born with that ability, or if it is something that they have developed?

And so I DID! And what I found was that it is something that everyone should learn and use. I learned that it only takes a few seconds to leave an impression that will last a lifetime!

I accomplished this by asking them if they try to be charismatic consciously, observing them, and researching a lot on the topic.

There was A LOT of information available, but two commonalities stood out:

1. Their elastic-eye-contact
2. Their slow-smile

Chances are you already know that both smiling and having strong eye-contact is important. This is different!

1. Elastic-eye-contact is something you already do naturally! Think of the time you were watching your favorite sporting event, or a show you really enjoy, and someone was demanding your attention. You first turn your head towards them, then your eyes, and only as a last resort! Doing so, whether you wanted to or not, you communicated that the show/activity you were enjoying is very important to you and you wouldn't want to grant a single second for the attention thief unless you have to.

Now think of it from the point-of-view of the attention thief. If you were to request someone's attention and they aren't looking at you; they communicate that what you want, and therefore YOU are not important to them.

So now you probably figured out the eye-contact rule that would earn you greater respect among everyone you talk to; that is if you chose to use it! Every time you want to break eye-contact, do so reluctantly. As if your eyes are connected by an invisible elastic-band.

Elastic-eye-contact is nothing more than a habit. You prolong your eye contact by only a few seconds throughout the course of the conversation, but those few seconds will communicate that you value and respect the person more than HOURS of praising their wit and character! After all talk is cheap.

2. As you probably guessed, it's the slowly part to smiling that separates the communication amateurs from the aficionados! Don't forget that humans are creatures of habit. We hear something we like and we react positively to it; we smile. A comedian that performs for us, has us laughing right after a punchline; the comedian entertains, but he build affection!

You don't want to be a dancing-monkey, you want the affection and respect of the people you interact with, regularly, or not. When it comes to conversing in a small group or one-on-one, a better approach will get you a better result. A generic smile is a lot like the generic "Hey! How are you?". It is a phrase that we throw out so easily, not ever really expecting any answer other than "good". Similarly a smile for those people that even remember to smile is just a formality. But just like the greeting; smiling fast is a habit - and we know that habits can be changed!

Think of the time when you were talking to someone and they were responding on 'autopilot'. With generic words and sentences and reactions, as if they weren't even in the conversation. Also remember that everyone wants other to like them to some degree, so there is no emotion worse than indifference! Please try to adapt for a few seconds the point of view of someone that was trying to charm, but didn't get a smile as payment. An auto-smile is not that much better!

On the other hand; a s-l-o-w smile quickly goes from unnoticed to the focal point of your conversation. It will set the tone for the conversation and will echo with every following word. A slow smile communicates that there was some recognition or thought that happened in your mind; which gave birth to the positive feeling that created the smile on your face. Notice that the smile was created for that one individual, and NOT the generic stock smile that you flash the checkout girl with, as you leave the counter with the coffee you purchased.

Your slow smile shows that you were thinking about the person in front of you, or about something they said. They feel that the smile was created just for them, and the power of the positive feeling that you communicate in that extra second will be akin to you becoming a god-father/mother to their children!

These two, two-second rules can quickly become the most valuable life-skills that will make you an individual that others will want to talk about and meet. If you choose to empower yourself with them, in a matter of a few repetitions they can become your habits; ones that will work for you for the rest of your life!

A few extra thoughts

1. Eye-contact is easy to maintain when you are the one doing the listening. As I mentioned before; we are creatures of habit, and since childhood we have cultivated the habit of looking at who/what demands our attention. That included parents, teachers, bosses. So when we are the ones talking we similarly demand the eye-contact of others and place ourselves in that position of power. Many times people find it harder to maintain eye-contact when they are the ones doing the talking. My only advice is just do it!

The more you do it, the more comfortable you become with it. And soon people will see you as a confident and interesting individual. You will also have a better understanding of how what you are saying is received when you are looking in the eyes of the person you are talking to. That has to do with Neuro Linguistic Programing (NLP) and is another study of communication all-together.

But even if you choose to not work on the amount of eye-contact. Breaking eye-contact slowly, will in itself communicate that you are interested in and/or respect the person before you, leaving a lasting impact on them.

2. As for smiling slowly; it's like any physical habit you have. If for example you wanted to change the way you walk and carry yourself, or your posture, you must consciously change it. You have to remember to do it, until it becomes automatic. So the best way then, is not to wait for a conversation, because you'll probably be focusing on something else, but to practice in front of the mirror and make the slow-smile automatic!

Thank you very much for reading, now go conquer the world!

Alex Shaikevich Jr. is an entrepreneur with interests in face-to-face communication, online business, psychology, and self-improvement. He seeks to constantly improve his life, especially by amassing life skills and creating greater freedom of time and money.

You may choose to follow some of his developments for information and inspiration here on HubPages and on his blog at http://myfirst2k.blogspot.com; where he does his best to share some of his thoughts and findings from his business ventures, hobbies and day-to-day observations.