Angrymothersyndrome

Hello! I'm glad you are able to take the time and find interest in this website. This is basically for short stories and poetry that, I myself, have written. For the public and fof only your enjoyment! Please do not steal or take any part of the poetry apart to form your own.

I am looking into publishing a book, "Angry Mother Sydrome" of just my poetry. This is where this website comes in, to see if the public enjoys what I'm giving. Be sure to leave a comment!

I am different and disoriented.

I wonder how life can be so depriving.

I hear how I'm distant and bleeding.

I see how people reflect on me.

I am different and disoriented.

I pretend to be someone I'm not.

I feel I should have nothing to hide.

I touch what harms us all.

I worry about the unforgetable.

I cry to ease the pain.

I am different and disoriented.

I understand the confusion and displacement.

I say I should be more tolerant.

I dream of a better eternity.

I try to keep together and believe in better.

I hope to die a good death.

I am different and disoriented.

Can't seem to make it clear,

As to how long we were apart.

Can't seem to see this through till the end,

I'm growing numb with the cold,

As you feel for the unknown.

We aren't what we said we'd be.

The good kids down the block.

Instead we're frozen in place,

By the drugs and sex and the crime.

Pointing fingers,

and judging eyes.

No one seems to recognize,

The true kids we once were.

Now frozen in place by the pain killers,

We spread our wings to fly,

Only to be caught in the net,

And thrown down to die.

I'll never be fine.

I'll never see till the end.

When the world stops its spinning,

And we all stand silent,

In memory of who we once were.

Suck your smoke through the tortured lungs,

And stab yourself full of acid,

It's our choice to be who we are.

Is it our choice?

Or was it meant to end all in misery?

Even from the begining.

I could hear the screams,

Of how rotten our reality.

Is and use to be,

In our sickening souls

We'll keep to what we hold.

We sneak into the back,

Eyes blood shot,

Mouth filled with laughter.

Not my first time,

Nor will it be my last.

I will not fail to be the kid I wasn't suppose to be.

I'm moving in a fast paced world,

Where I'm to slow to keep up,

My feet slipping from beneath me.

I fall face forward, into the drugs of bad religion.

I'm failing to say I love myself.

I'm failing school; class.

I'm failing in the department of good child.

No matter how hard I try I run with the wrong crowd,

Now I'm being brought down by a mischevious smile,

And a desceptive heart.

How will I ever redeem myself from this hole I've become?

Now she's slipping into the back,

And we're lighting up,

The smoke smothers my lungs in a suicide attempt,

That will come true.

I'm loosing what I once was,

The inocents is gone.

And I'm falling face forward,

Never to realize,

I've gone to far that last time.

And now we're lighting up,

And we're having a good time.

Empty Smiles

Begining lines.

This is what it all comes down to.

My head is spinning, I can't come back.

I've lost control once before, and I will agian.

Ill let go of this, as soon as I can.

I've said this before, but it never happens.

Life is but a twisted blur to me, I feel I'm nothing.

I grow numb with the cold,although you hold me.

Your letting go, I feel you slip.

It's as if you've know that it would come to this.

Hate as a thought,

Meth as blood,

needles of love,

This is how I end

What is this feeling that defies your every move?

The countless hours you've spent on this wretched groove.

The groove on the wrists of your hands.

That you just can't understand?

I peak through the door to check on you,

Only to find another bruise.

Your screams can be heard from down the hall,

Amazing you can even speak at all.

I wish I could help you,

by binding your hands.

but you won't let me,

the razor believed to be your friend...

Tears of hopelessness,

Lonliness.

Not much worth anymore.

So worried about what others think.

Lost to the world of what I want to be.

I'm such in a stress mode.

Not really willing to do much,

Not really willing to love more.

Just here to say,

I'll love at some point in time.

I love the way they laugh,

Even at the way they mess up.

Its not even my fault I'm the way I am.

I hate every word that slips between her lips.

Why is it so damn hard to find her.

In the crowd of none-mattering faces.

Why is it so hard to keep her.

I need an answer as to how I know her.

Here I sit in my daze,

Watching the clock ticks its life away.

Day by day I'm wasted to depression.

Why not just end it now they say?

I'll never pull into the weakness of suicide,

its not a place in my mind,

Where I'll hide.

I'll never fail to love again,

It just takes time,

To fall apart?

No, to love the same as I once did.

Fingers rub down the oily skin,

Thick yellow nails scratch the pealing flesh.

Red eyes sickening to the stomach.

Misfourtanate event.

Why was no one there?

When the monster came from beneath my bed?

Parents say they are not true,

But I believe,

He'll come for me till I'm dead.

I wish that he looked as gross as he is.

I miss feeling like the child I could've been.

But he's the predator,

And I the prey.

It doesn't look like,

I'll be sticking around to stay.

Oh, the pain slows down my pace,

As his body envelopes mine.

We collide in a dark reality.

I try to lick chapped lips.

But I'm over come by pain.

As he undoes my bra,

I'm fumbling for a life line.

As he slips fingers between thighs,

I'm screaming for my life to die.

As he scratches yellow stained nails down rough oily skin,

I'm wishing the monster had stayed under my bed.

I can't seem to get it right,

This lack of self control.

I can't believe,

You weren't there.

I've lost all my nerve,

When I was told where you ran.

I'm at a loss of words,

As to how you got away with it.

And now I see you,

Crawling on both knees.

Take me under,

Show me where I can fly.

Throw me over,

I've got to find the reasons why.

Pull me through it,

And swear you'll never say goodbye.

But it's too late,

You already have.

The shadows a haunting reality,

Of what use to be.

The children playing in my head,

For so long I've dread.

This day to come to an end.

There will be no saving you now,

The rope thick about your neck.

There is no reason to doubt,

You were lost and never found.

Bleeding all over the fuckin' place.

I feel the reason to tell you this,

Since we were once so close.

But now your standing over me,

With a queer look to your eyes,

As you study mine,

You lift me up.

Hands pulled tight,

Body like a slut.

Push in and out,

Down and up.

Regret nothing but what you didn't do.

Just to stand there and keep hush hush.

Now the world is coming to an end.

With intent of a killer,

Slit the wrists of inocent body.

Watch the blood run cold,

Oh so slow,

The heart pumps one last vein full of blood.

And now you stand there,

Yet again.

Listen to the pulse slow.

And the hours quicken,

As you miss your chance,

For once in your life,

To save the sacred heart,

Of an inocents never bought.

You're my motivation,

To do the right thing.

You're my motivation,

To throw the key away.

You're my motivation,

Don't get caught.

You're my motivation,

Realize.

Sensing the tension in the air,

Your saliva thick in my mouth.

Covered by raw emotions, yeah,

Lost to the lust of distrust.

You're my motivation,

To get away.

You're my motivation,

Such distaste.

You're my motivation,

Don't get caught.

You're my motivation,

To murder the soul.

Sensing the tension in the air,

Your life at the palm of my hand.

Relieving yourself of my fate, yeah,

Left to no breath of the lungs.

You're my motivation,

To die trying.

You're my motivation,

To turn inside blue.

You're my motivation,

To catch the key.

You're my motivation,

Realize