Apple Toast and a Dash of P.C.
69Child's Play
Good morning breakfastpoppers. Today is Wednesday, November 11, 2009. Today we are celebrating Veteran's Day and I would like to take a moment to thank our brave soldiers for their dedicated service to our country. You make us all proud to be Americans. God bless you...
This morning we are going to be privy to a meeting that marks the beginning of political correctness in this country. Let's prepare an easy delicious breakfast and step into our time capsule to discover what happened to change us from people who could laugh at ourselves into people who are afraid of our own shadow.
If you want to cook along you will need 4 slices of bread, 3 friends, 3 apples, that have been peeled, cored and sliced, 1/2 cup sugar and some melted butter. Butter a baking pan and put the bread in the pan. Mix sugar and melted butter together and dip each slice of apple in the melted butter. Arrange apple on top of bread and bake at 350 degrees for about 10 minutes or until apple slices are brown and tender. Sit down and enjoy and then slip into your capsule. I'll meet you at the venue.
Thank you assembled guests. My name is Liberal Toafault. We are here to formulate new restrictions on how we address each other in society and what we will be allowed to say. The purpose of these restrictions to is to spare the feelings of some people in society and to make sure that they don't feel different. We will refer to the entire movement as "political correctness" and we are hoping that it will dramatically change our people from free and honest to a quivering bunch of morons who can't speak or think clearly. I really like the sound of that.
I will now turn the microphone over to Ms. Bee Niceorelse. Please share your thoughts with us.
Well, being "a person of color ", I would like to advise the audience and the nation that the following names will no longer be allowed. We are no longer, Negroes, colored, Afro-Americans, Black, or African Americans. Anyone using these words will be labelled "racist". How's that for straight talk? I"ll turn the podium over to another distinguished colleague, Mr. Imveryshort.
Thank you, I am here to address the evolution of the original label "crippled". We played around with a few words and what began as the derogatory word "crippled", became handicapped, then disabled and now we prefer physically challenged. Anything other then the latter will be considered in poor taste and those that use improper words will be punished. It is with great pleasure that I now welcome Prof. Al Jesse Pelosi- SharpJackson to the stage to present an overview of political correctness to the audience.
Thank you, it is a privilege to be here. The purpose of this movement is to impose restrictions that prevent recognition of differences among gender, religion, belief systems, sexual orientation and nationality. We must all alter our choice of words in order to avoid ruffling the feathers of a group of people. In due course, we will be rewriting the dictionary and burning the old ones. The distinguished Speaker of the House Nancy I. Toldyouso will address Congress when the dictionary is a done deal. To everyone's great relief terms like tea baggers, astroturfers and birthers will still be considered P.C.
This concludes our presentation for the day. I will take one or two questions from the audience. Yes?
With all do respect sir, how do you suggest police investigations be handled. If an extremely short person of color dressed like a chicken, robbed a convenience store, wouldn't it be good police work to describe this individual accurately?
In a nutshell, the answer is no. If the police put out an APB and described the perpetrator as he is, then every "person of color" who is very short and dressed like a chicken will be stopped in the vicinity of the crime. This is discriminatory and we will not tolerate such intolerance
How do you suppose it will be possible to catch the suspect without an accurate description?
Sir, that is not my problem. My job is to protect my people, anything else is of no concern to me..
I'll take one more question from the audience.
Sir, are you at all concerned that the roots of political correctness can be traced back to totalitarian regimes, when people could be persecuted relentlessly for saying the wrong thing?
Not at all. That's the kind of world I prefer to live in, that is, as long as I am the one making the rules. Let's adjourn now, I've had enough questions for one morning.
But sir, we have other concerns we would like to discuss.
I am sure I speak for all of us on this committee when I say, "I don't care and you don't matter. You are not part of any distinguishable group as far as I can see, so you have no protections and no rights. I repeat, go home".....
Breakfastpoppers, it's time to climb back into our capsules and check things out at home. Something tells me we haven't traveled very far at all...POP...
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Dear Breakfastperson,
I just realized I had been violating the new rules by using a gender word in your name. I beg your forgiveness and please don't tell on me. I would never use discrimination in any endeavor.
Even though I myself am a WASP. I always liked dodgeball but I know it's not allowed now. I used to like to really nail someone with that dodgeball. Back in my younger day I even got into fistfight or two. I have overcome most of my violent tendancies. I do revert at times and political correctness is one of those.
Do we now have to call that salty tasty confection personcorn?
Ah!, the big government of mind over matter. "If They don't mind, it doesn't Matter".
My three friends are wagging their tailless rumps and want to go play Frisbee, so it's a quick shot and I'm off to enjoy my freedom, playing like a happy child with his dogs and try and forget this road to destruction that we all now ride.
Cheers, I wish you a good day as well. Look forward to hearing from you tomorrow.
I'm glad to hear the pages are having problems as I could not figure out why I can't access my hubs unless I'm signed out.
Pop
Well done; you nailed it! Your robber scenario; an extremely short person of color dressed like a chicken, robbed a convenience store, is hilarious. Unfortunately the PC crowd’s response to the posed problem, how do you suppose it will be possible to catch the suspect without an accurate description; Sir, that is not my problem. My job is to protect my people, anything else is of no concern to me; is all to true these days. You are correct in your conclusion; you didn’t have to travel very far in the future!
Dear jiberish,
I had a lot of trouble posting this hub, so thanks for the heads up. The videos tell the whole story. Our President is a Muslim to his core. I feel sick. Contrast his defense of Islam with his contempt for the US.
Dear Tom,
What a ridiculous culture we have become. All of this garbage defies common sense. When I was a kid, other kid's used to call me bucktooth. Why they weren't imprisoned and how in the world I survived, I'll never know. Let's meet at the bar, I've had enough....
Nice PC Parity POP
BPOP - A great Breakfast, I love warm Apples. Though I'm glad they're not the warm 'road apples'(Horse owners and Parade marchers know what I mean) of PC. But there is some good news, they have made it so complicated that now many on the left can't remember which phrase is correct today. Sooner or later it will like communisim fall of its own weight. Patience is the watchword here, enjoy the collapse. It will look like one of those buildings coming down when it does.
See ya at the Inn my turn to buy...
Good morning 50 caliber,
Living where you do seems like an answer to a prayer. The nation has lost its core values and common sense is dead. Enjoy your dogs, my friend and your freedom.
Pop,
I'll be there the first round is on me. With my middle being Oakley I took a lot of kidding being called Annie. Thus the cause of many fistfights.
Dear Patriot,
Thanks for coming to breakfast. We are traveling down such an idiotic path in this country. If our current story was made into a movie, no one would believe it. They would say it was a farce!
Great hub this morning breakfastop, Political correctness seems to be a favorite alibi these days. I say call it like it is and by the way my latest hub is not a reference to any group of over sensitive bigots who still enjoying playing the color card.
Thanks Cj, Come by for breakfast anytime...There is always room at my table.
Dear Hmrjmr,
I defer to you my friend. I'll gladly meet you at the bar and we can talk about the insanity a little further. I'd meet you even if you weren't buying..
Dear tom,
Wow.. and somehow you managed to survive. It must be your sense of humor that saved you. As a nation we are completely humorless. I'll be at the bar, Hmrjmr is buying, so work it out with him. Later....
Dear Robert,
That's what I like about you, you are straightforward and real.
POP: Keeping with the PC theme, I think you erred when using the word chicken. It should be poultry - chicken is too exact.
Enough of this, I'll see you at the bar... I'll be the white woman dressed as a wine bottle - Hence Pino Krisio
Save me a seat....
And I'm buying a round for all of our Veterans. Thank you!
Great as usual,
Keep on hubbing!
Dear Pino,
Oh how callous and politically incorrect of me. I'm sure Peta will be on my case as well as the thought police. Chickens should be called furry creatures that humans eat for their own satisfaction. I'm leaving for the bar now, I think I've lost my mind!
Dear Pino,
I forgot, Hmrjmr's buying and Tom wants the first round. Think of some politically incorrect things we can talk about. Should be fun..Later...
PC has gotten out of hand, no doubt. I think the people who go out of their way to be politically correct are the ones who harbor secret prejudices. Good Hub.
Dear eovery,
Thanks as always..
Dear SuzieCat,
It is the death of common sense.
Wow, great hub,
Prof. Al Jesse Pelosi- SharpJackson is right on, but in order to keep it short needs to be reminded that everything is incorrect until it is approved by our liberal congress.
Those folks of color better be careful, do they know what the letters NAACP stand for,, in case you forgot
National association for the Advancement of COLORED people!
A jackass by any other name is still a JACKASS!
POP, I just wanted to stop by and ask exactly what gender and race should I use to be politically correct. I do not want to upset the m-asses, please advise.
Pop, I checked for you a couple of times early today and thought you took the day off! You wrote a very good hub indeed. Political correctness is so ridiculous and more importantly it is becoming dangerous. I loved the question about the police description. I know on a personal level I feel less safe now than I did when George Bush was in office. There are so many desperate people now. I also salute the veterans today and appreciate the sacrifices they must make to keep us safe.
Dear GreatAmerican,
You are so right. Why has there been no public outcry, no marches and no strikes? When are we going to come to our senses and stop the idiocy?
Dear jiberish,
Pardon my politically incorrect language, but screw the masses. Say whatever POPS into your head. I still have a sense of humor, something this nation has lost along the way.
Dear Pamela,
Apparently there was a problem at Hub pages that jiberish alerted me to. Thanks for being persistent, I would have missed your company at breakfast. I too feel less safe than when George Bush was President, after all, we have a President who is not at all sure where his allegiance lies.
Whatever happened to calling a spade a spade?? Loved the humour in this one. I have one question: do you think this is a process in the evolution of democratic nations? I know we have a lot of it right now - so does the UK. So maybe it isn't something out of a totalitarian regime - maybe just a democratic diversion :)
Dear Shalini,
I don't really think it's something that evolved from the democratic movement. Mainly, it is the death of common sense. Historically, it has been said that the roots of PC do lie in Marxism and the like.
Great hub Pop, Your best yet!
You know, I’m glad I’m not bland. Apparently I am a colorful card carrying Constitutional Conservative Linguistic terrorist and I am very happy to be Politically Incorrect. While good manners refrain me from using words in poor taste, I still call a spade, a spade, I know right and wrong do have a definite dividing line and life is not all shades of gray.
I know whether you like it or not there are winners and losers and learning how to deal with both is best. The politically correct crowd knows this at heart as well, what they have forgotten is,
Red, White and Blue are the most beautiful colors in the world, colors that stand for all that is good in our Republic and the world. Only political correctness sees and sustains the gray, the rest of us are forced to see.
Red – the color we all bleed on the battlefield
White – the color of truth and virtue in our dealings
Blue – the color of the world we all live on and the sky we all live beneath
All the other colors, trappings and accusations are insignificant and the tools of a controlling movement that needs to be stilled.
Dear ready,
Smart commentary to say the least. PC may eventually get us killed, Good thing you know how to handle a weapon!
speak or not speak, be heard or not heard... the people of this nation are sick with a disease of apathy and they have become dulled into cattle. I for one would rather be a wolf and hunt down those that would have us conform to the whims of those that think they control us.
It is refreshing to see that we still have the right for free speech for now and that it is being put to good use in hubs like this one. Don't buy into the hype of PC... use the terms, phrases that shock the public. You can call me an overweight, fat, lazy, good for nothing, cracker ass pasty white honky, Pollock and be proud you did. I don't mind a bit. Just don't call my wife a Pollock because her heritage is Norwegian and she's got that angry viking mean streak and when she puts on her horned helmet and amazon viking lady gear and goes berserk on your CHUD of an ass well you can't say I didn't warn ya!
Keep em coming Breakfastpop!
Dear cow Flipper,
My hat goes off to you, a man who is not afraid to tell it like it is with a sense of humor and intelligence that is so appreciated. You are welcome at my breakfast table any day.....
Jiberish thank you for the You tube!
Breakfastpop, Nothing is politically correct anymore! I am vertically challenged :) Pleasantly plump :) and my foster daughter is chocolate :) Two things I won't change are I am an American and a Christian!
Dear Kebennett,
What you are for sure is brilliant!
jiberish says:
2 weeks ago
POP Hubpages are having technical issues, but I wanted to post this link this morning before it's pulled from the internet. It is all in Obama's words telling us that he is a Muslim:
http://www.youtube.com/watch_popup?v=tCAffMSWSzY#t