Ask and It Is Given
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An Unhappy Childhood, By Choice
When I was a child, I thought of myself as a heroine stuck in a tragic drama of being unloved and misunderstood. I was often sullen and pouty, dissatisfied with my life, and angry at the world for every disappointment and unfulfilled desire.
My thought patterns kept me firmly entrenched in a world of pain and lack. My parents tried to help me by showering me with love and affection and filling my mind with advice from motivational speakers. I told myself they just didn't understand, closed my door, listened to depressing music, and filled journals with tear-drenched poems about my latest heartache. I dreamed up scenarios were I would kill myself and then they'd be sorry! But I wanted be around to enjoy just how sorry they were, so suicide wasn't an option.
There were definitely happy times in my childhood, and I had great friends over the years, but I also spent an inordinate amount of time focusing on the things I didn't have and how unfair life was. "If only I was white," I thought. "Then I would be beautiful and all of my dreams would come true."
Years later, I stumbled upon a book that helped me recognize the hell on Earth I was creating through my thoughts and emotions. I had become a much more positive person by then, through life experiences, relationships, books, and meditation, yet I still didn't fully understand the power of my thoughts or the link between thoughts and reality. What I learned through this book has had such a positive impact on my life that I wanted to share the main philosophy with others. Plus, countrywomen asked me to write a hub about it. So, here it is. :)
The Law of Attraction
The book, Ask and It Is Given, is about the law of attraction and the science of deliberate creation. The book is written by a woman, Esther Hicks, who began to receive messages from a spiritual entity called Abraham in her meditations. Whether you believe in channeling and spiritual guides or not, I think anyone can appreciate the wisdom and simplicity of the book.
The main idea in Ask and It Is Given is that we are all extensions of non-physical source energy, and we have come into this world to joyfully create our experiences by communicating with this energy through our thoughts and emotions. Here is an excerpt from the book:
"This book is written to help you understand that you have the ability to always allow your true nature to pour through you, and that as you learn to consciously allow your full connection with the You that is your Source, your experience will be one of absolute joy. By consciously choosing the direction of your thoughts, you can be in constant connection with Source Energy, with God, with joy, and with all that you consider to be good" (p. 13)
According to Abraham-Hicks, all attraction begins with desire, and new desires are constantly born within us. The goal of the book is to help us create the ideal circumstances for the fulfillment of our desires through our thoughts, emotions, and vibrations.
Abraham-Hicks defines the law of attraction as follows: That which is like unto itself is drawn (p. 25). Therefore, our vibrational frequency must be in alignment with our desires in order to manifest them in our lives. To achieve this vibrational harmony, they suggest imagining that a particular desire has already come into your experience. This is where our emotional guidance systems come into play. If you are offering a vibrational match for your desire, you will feel good, optimistic, and energized, if you are not offering a vibrational match, you are focusing on the lack of that which you desire, and you may feel impatient, worried, and pessimistic. In short, think thoughts that make you feel good!
Putting It Into Practice
Ask and It Is Given includes a lot of processes you can use to move up the emotional scale and create positive experiences, and emphasizes that the most important thing is to feel good! We didn't come here to suffer or struggle with our desires, we came here to remember who we are and engage in joyful co-creation with source energy.
My first three experiences with deliberate creation were a long-term relationship, a new job, and a hybrid car. The new job came first (a couple of weeks after I set my intention), followed by a boyfriend, who found the exact car I was looking for online and helped me negotiate a good deal on it. The funny thing about the boyfriend is I used to say, many years ago, that I would date an Aquarius who drove a silver Honda, and he completely fit the description. Unfortunately, he was also a manipulative control freak, so it wasn't meant to be.
My current relationship is a dream come true. I have a loving, funny, considerate, and kind mate who loves me exactly as I am and values my happiness. The funny thing is, I "met" him online shortly after reading Ask and It Is Given, but then I jumped into that other relationship, so it took 16 months for us to finally meet in person. The timing was perfect when we met--I felt happy, free, and excited about the future, and two years later, I'm in love with him, with me, and with life in general.
I encourage anyone who is interested to give conscious creation a try. It's very similar to praying, with the added dimension of visualization and positive emotions. Mediation and present-moment awareness are two tools that can help you create an ideal space for manifestation, and the more you focus on the good and reach for the joy, the more you will experience the joyful realization of all your desires.
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Comments
Very cool! Can you please provide the link for your website? And good luck with your book!
Melissa - as always, your hubs are so refreshing. Isn't it strange when you reach out and ask in faith, it's given to you pressed and overflowing?
To quote you, don't sweat the small stuff :) Most intelligent kids go through agonies in their minds while growing up - it's later that the equilibrium sets in.
Lovely hub Melissa. There's so much misery in the world these days that it's good to read something more upbeat! I've not read the Esther Hicks book, but I've seen clips of her speaking on YouTube, and I've read other books on the same subject matter, my favourite being 'excuse me, your life is waiting' by Lynn Grabhorn.
Somedays I wake up cranky and forget what I've learnt, and it takes me a while to remember that I'm supposed to be thinking positive thoughts, and not slouching around growling at everyone, but mostly these days, I can keep it together, and it does make a big difference.
My heart expanded as I read your hub; you had to feel that angst as a child to be who you are today, filled with love, compassion and a positive attitude; everything happens for a reason, or so I believe. I too met my mate online, we both are grateful and joyful we met. Have you considered writing a book?
Wow, thank you everyone for these wonderful comments! I've had to deal with some "small stuff" at work this morning, so coming on Hub pages and seeing all of these kinds words is like a breath of fresh air (or a puff of oxygen, as Shalini would say).
Shalini, Yes, it never ceases to amaze me how quickly and completely my prayers and intentions are answered. The challenge is, I sometimes forget to ask for what I want because I'm too caught up in the way things are, or seem to be. Thank you for reminding me to keep the faith and reach out for assistance, and thanks for assuring me that I wasn't the only kid who struggled with my thoughts while growing up.
Amanda, Thanks for your comment! I also read most of Excuse Me, Your Life Is Waiting and it's a very similar philosophy, but Lynn seemed to employ a more whimsical tone, and didn't delve too far into the how and why of manifestation, as I recall. If you're thinking about reading another book on the subject, I can't recommend Ask and It Is Given highly enough. It changed my life. I also recommend A New Beginning I and II by Abraham-Hicks. As a side note, this is interesting--when you mentioned Lynn, I remembered hearing something about her dying shortly after that book was published, so I went online to research it a little more, and my Google search for "lynn grabhorn death" pulled up a website developed by Steve Pavlina, who is a guy I sat next to at a spirituality conference I went to in Vegas to see... guess who... Abraham-Hicks! Funny how it all comes full circle. :) Thanks for another coincidental comment!
VioletSun, Thank you so much for your kind words! I agree with the notion that everything happens for a reason, and my life continually affirms that truth. I would not change a single thing about my childhood because I know that it helped me become the person I am today. And hopefully, the lessons I'm learning in this lifetime will carry over into my next incarnation. I'm happy to hear that you've met someone and feel such joy and gratitude in your relationship--I know the feeling! Thank goodness for the connections we get to make over the Internet. How did we ever get by without it? And thank you for mentioning a book--yes, it's something I've thought about often, but the subject is still unclear to me. Any ideas? :)
Hi Melissa,
I hadn't heard that she'd died, but I just googled it myself. You're right about her book. It's very whimsical, but I guess that's a manner of writing I feel comfortable with. Having said that, I shall certainly look out for the Esther Hicks book.
Hi Amanda--I'm happy to hear that, I think you'll enjoy it! The writing style is also quite playful and uplifting. The Pavlina site has an interesting discussion about the book Lynn was working on shortly before her death--apparently it focused more on dark aspects and demons--makes me wonder if the book and her illness were somehow related: http://www.stevepavlina.com/forums/intention-manif
Melissa it's great that you made things work for you. I think intellectually a lot of us realise the power of positive affirmation...it's putting it into practice on a regular basis that's difficult. All the best! :)
Thank you, Feline Prophet! I couldn't agree more. I partially wrote this to remind myself about these concepts. :) Just this morning, I found myself complaining about someone at work, and then my mom lovingly reminded me that everyone is in our lives for a reason, and it's best to send that person love and light and trust that everything will work out in the end. I thanked her for the advice and then she told me it was advice I'd given her in the past. :) How quickly we forget!
Thanks for your comment. :)
I am glad you have got some of the things you were hoping for, such as a healthy relationship, an environmental car, and a better job. Positive thinking is intrumental in helping us move forward and feel good about life. People love to say this is boloney, but we are put on earth for such a short time and I feel sorry for those who cannot be happy during this short time. It is important to be positive and think positive, because that way good things will come into our life, or at least we will be more appreciative of the things we already have. Thanks for the inspiring hub.
Hi Melissa. Seems that you're doing well and I'm glad to know that!
OK. I've just downloaded a PDF version of this book.
Here's the link in case anyone else would like to use it.
http://d.scribd.com/docs/1o4ydcheckgwh3l7vvv5.pdf
If this literally works for you then you are a being who has ascended to a much higher level than anyone I have previously encountered. Since I am very prone to discounting things that have no basis in science I often find it necessary to put aside my preconceptions to maintain an open mind when evaluating information like this. Often times it's simply the style in which something is presented that makes it hard to accept.
I'll give myself a little nudge in this case, since I hold you and your viewpoint in such high regard.
The following line from your Hub offers a small opening into the highly esoteric but nevertheless scientific realm of theoretical physics.
"Therefore, our vibrational frequency must be in alignment with our desires in order to manifest them in our lives."
The one word, vibrational, ties this otherwise purely spiritual concept to the most recent advances in the study of physics, string theory.
http://www.pbs.org/wgbh/nova/elegant/everything.ht
It is my hope that by reading the book with this information in mind I may be able to get beyond the seemingly theatrical aspects of the subject.
This kind of thing is very hard for a pragmatist to simply accept on its face. It slips too easily into a pigeon hole with things like palmistry, psychic readings, mentalists and other "paranormal phenomena". Although the jury is still out on most such subjects there is such a long history of fraud and chicanery associated with many of them that the first reaction of a person like me is to dismiss it out of hand unless it is accompanied by verifiable documentation. Because of the respect I have for you personally, I will consider your experiences acceptable as that documentation.
I'll get back to you after I've read the book.
Hi SweetiePie! Thanks for your comment! I agree with you about the power of positive thinking--it is amazing how many good things can come into our lives when we continually focus on the good and maintain a positive attitude. Thanks for the kind words and best of luck with your creations. :)
Hi ColdWarBaby! Thank you so much for offering your perspective. I feel honored by your respect for my views and your willingness to suspend your disbelief based on my experiences. Thank you also for the link to the book! I encourage anyone who is interested to check out the online version.
I do believe there is a science behind this, and I wish I understood more about the mechanisms that make it work. I picked up The Elegant Universe a couple of years ago, but I've had trouble reading it, so I'm glad you provided the PBS link. The movie, What the Bleep Do We Know? does a good job of explaining the link between quantum physics and deliberate creation--I think much of it is tied to the way our minds work and the fabric of the universe.
As always, I appreciate your reserved optimism and pragmatic outlook. I think there is much to be discovered through an empirical approach to this subject, and I wish you much success in your experiments with manifestation.
I hope you enjoy the book and I look forward to hearing your thoughts on it.
Thanks for your comment! :)
And thank you for mentioning a book--yes, it's something I've thought about often, but the subject is still unclear to me. Any ideas? :)>>>>
By the way you write, how about a book on inspirational or motivational essays, the way Wayne Dyer does at times?
Hi VioletSun,
Thanks for the recommendation! I've thought about that, but then I wonder what unique perspective I can offer to the bulk of work that's already been done in that department. One subject I'm particularly fond of is personal empowerment, and whether it can help individuals in the developing world rise above their circumstances. I'll be writing a thesis for my grad program that will focus on dependency versus empowerment, and hopefully in my research I'll discover an aspect of this puzzle that can be expanded into a book.
One subject I'm particularly fond of is personal empowerment, and whether it can help individuals in the developing world rise above their circumstances. I'll be writing a thesis for my grad program that will focus on dependency versus empowerment, and hopefully in my research I'll discover an aspect of this puzzle that can be expanded into a book>>>
Oooh, this feels good! Had little chills. LOL! Its unique.
You think so? Cool! Thanks for the encouragement! :)
OK Melissa. I've started the book four or five times. It's definitely an uphill battle for me. Maybe I'm just an agent of the dark forces! Or maybe I'm just not ready for a transcendental experience.
One of the first things that occurred to me when reading "The Basis of Your Life Is Absolute Freedom" was the strong similarity to Alistair Crowley saying "Do what thou wilt shall be the whole of the law".
Crowley is considered by some to be a master of Magick. A somewhat dark form of spiritual manipulation was all I could gather from reading him. I didn’t read much. Gibberish, IMHO.
I’ll keep trying but the book doesn’t seem to be saying anything to me.
I’m actually considering a chapter by chapter response to the book as a Hub sometime in the future.
All I can say is, if it works for you, go for it!
Hi ColdWarBaby,
Sorry to hear about your experience! I thought the message flowed very easily. I guess it's not for everyone!
What would you hope to accomplish by writing a chapter-by-chapter response?
And even if you can't get through the book, I hope you'll consider practicing the law of attraction by visualizing how you'd like things to be and choosing thoughts that feel good.
I've been visualizing positive change in the world for fifty years. There must be an art to it that I simply don't comprehend.
I wouldn't necessarily hope to accomplish anything other than publishing a possibly interesting, multi-part HUB. I rather doubt I'll do it anyway. I'm not much in the mood for "Hubbing" these days. I seem to have entered a state of creative and emotional lassitude.
I was down for most of two weeks with some sort of virus and now my wife has contracted it. Our grandson was also afflicted with some kind of stomach bug which knocked him for a loop for a couple of days.
Maybe that's what's got me dragging. Don't know. Just have to wait and see.
I've been visualizing a world of peace and prosperity for as long as I can remember. That thought has always felt very good to me. Unfortunately it remains only a thought.
Hi ColdWarBaby,
I'm sure you're not alone in those visualization exercises, yet it's a very lofty goal, which requires the support of likeminded individuals throughout the world, investing more energy into a vision of peace and prosperity than they squander on feelings of despair over the current state of things.
I've read that we can't create anything within the experiences of another, we can only create change within our own lives, and hope that others are touched by our example. From that perspective, peace will come when a sufficient portion of our global population holds a shared vision to bring it about. Here's an interesting article about a medication experiment in DC that demonstrates the potential impact of collective will on creating a more peaceful society: http://istpp.org/crime_prevention/
There are many organizations, foundations, and initiatives that are dedicated to global peace, so I believe we'll get there eventually, with a little faith and patience.
I'm very sorry to hear about the virus! It's hard for me to feel optimistic about anything when my body is out of balance. I hope your wife and grandson have a complete and speedy recovery, and that you start to feel more energetic and creative soon--I miss your hubs! And I'm sure I'm not the only one.
With that said, I understand how you feel. I've been in a bit of a funk recently and considered deleting my hub account yesterday... it was a culmination of factors, including feeling stuck, under-appreciated, and underutilized in my job, and a general sense of impatience and frustration. It's hard to explain how that translated into wanting to quit this community, but that's how I felt so I know where you're coming from regarding the creative and emotional lassitude.
Maybe it's post-election blues? No more eager anticipation as people discuss the many hurdles we'll need to overcome with cynicism and doubt.
Or maybe I'm just feeling sorry for myself. :)
In any case, thanks for the comment. I feel like I gain greater clarity through our exchanges.
Hi Melissa - came back to this hub and oh boy - it's quantum physics time? I wonder if you and ColdWarBaby followed this theory:
http://etresoi.ch/Denis/hologram.html
Somehow for me, the String theory, the ancient 'music of the spheres', the concept of the microcosm and the macrocosm and Plato's Idea and Reality seem now to come together in some fashion with this.
Hi Shalini,
Welcome back! :) Thanks for adding to the discussion. I've heard about the theory of a holographic universe, yet haven't taken the time to really familiarize myself with it. From the little I know (some of which I just learned by reading that article--thanks!), it makes sense that the whole is contained in each of the parts, and that everything is interconnected. It also reminds me of Plato's allegory of the cave.
This is funny--while I was skimming the article, my mind started to wander when I was reading the part about how our minds work, and I started thinking about what time I was meeting a friend for dinner tonight--about 5 second later, I received a text message from her! It really is amazing to think of how connected we all are. :)
Thanks for your comment!
Melissa. Your positive voice is something that's sorely needed today.
I push back against the darkness by being a conduit for all the negativity that is thrust upon us every day. It's the only way I know. It is my calling and I can no sooner deny it than stop my heart beating. I absorb it. I consume it. I explain it. I identify its cause. I try to make people look at it and come to terms with it rather than live in denial of its existence while it consumes them.
What I generally can't do is raise peoples spirits in the process. That is a gift that you have in abundance. You are able to see what I see, understand and accept it and still maintain you positive outlook. You can be very inspirational.
It would be a great loss to the community for your voice to go silent. If anything, you should be spreading your message of light far and wide.
ColdWarBaby, thank you.
Everything you said here, I value and appreciate. Thank you for the kind words, the encouragement, and for helping me believe I can make a positive difference in people's lives. That is my calling. It energizes me and fills me with a sense of purpose and possibility.
I work from home and at times it seems like network-based interactions have a dehumanizing effect, where people begin to treat me like a robot more than a person. But the kindness and encouragement I encounter from others in this community is astounding. The sense of kinship and understanding is nearly overwhelming.
Thanks again for your kind words. They are much appreciated. And despite your calling to explore the darker aspects of life, I believe you're an optimist at heart. ;)
This is an excellent and inspiring article. I will look for this book! :) Suzanne
Thanks, Suzanne! ColdWarBaby provided a link to an online version in his first comment, in case you wanted a sneak peak. I hope you enjoy it!
Melissa - Glad to know that now your life has been sorted out with no problems. Btw what stuck me was your quote "If only I was white," Is that really a problem. I mean if one grows up their kids in California will they have better self esteem surrounded by kids from more diverse backgrounds. It is troubling scenario but Iam not sure how much of your childhood problems were mentally "imagined" by you and how much is due to actual ground reality around you.
Hi countrywomen--thanks for your comment! In retrospect, I think much of it was imagined. I remember being upset on my way to a party because all the kids in the car were laughing and calling me "brown"--but really, I AM brown, so I don't know why it hurt me so much. I often made a choice to be upset over things that didn't need to upset me, and I assigned much greater importance to my skin color than probably anyone else in my life.
So, yes, I think it's great for kids to grow up in diverse areas, and I generally felt more comfortable in California than I did in New Jersey (where I grew up), but I also think there are countless other factors that will influence a person's self esteem, and our thoughts play a significant role in our self conceptions.
It's all such an interesting puzzle! :)
Thanks for revealing this. Even Iam brown but all around me others were either slightly more fair or like me hence never felt like this in India. But if I settle down here and raise kids I was wondering that scenario. Glad you answered my query. Iam happy for you that you have regained your self esteem and happy now.
This is truly a beautiful hub. Thank you for sharing your experiences with us. It's much like "The Secret" which I heard on the Oprah show. I think I'm going to go purchase the book you mentioned. Another good one I heard about from Oprah also is Eckart Tole's A New Earth. I need to purchase both of them-It's amazing the power we have within ourselves to change. They always say you can do anything you put your mind to, and I always believed it, but never believed it for myself. Thank you again
YES!! thanks for the reminder. Ask and It is Given is a wonderful book, the power of our thoughts to create our present reality is so powerful. our emotions are powerful guides to what we want, how we feel about a particular situation. I know, i can spend so much time in my head, thats why i love yoga, it helps to keep me in the present moment and reconnected to the Greater Good. I have just run upstairs to get my copy of Ask and It is Given and asked for guidance to improve my earning potential. I opened it up on page 184 (chapter on the process of meditation) and marvelled at the synchronisity (excuse spelling!) I am a Yoga and Meditation teacher, so obviously there is a lesson in there for me! Thank You. Be Well Ntathu.
PS. In my journey, it is a process, but I'm learning to see beyond the colour, age, race, religion of others and connect on a much deeper spirit level. Life is so rich and rewarding when i allow others into my life.
Thanks, Miss G! Sorry for the delay in my response--I just saw your comment today! And I highly recommend both this book and A New Earth. They are both quick reads and full of practical, life-changing advice. And yes, we have powers that we're just beginning to understand, and the more I learn, the more amazed I am.
Thanks for your comment, Ntathu! It's interesting... I love yoga, I really do, yet I have a very hard time with my practice. I think it's because I pushed myself too hard in the past, which has left me with some residual negative feelings about it. Lately, I've been thinking about how to recharge my practice, so if you have any advice in that area, I'd love to hear it! Meditation is another wonderful tool that is under-utilized in my life, for a similar reason--I think I'll need to go get my copy of the book and revisit page 184!
I'm glad to hear your journey is going so well--life is magical when we can move past the surface and connect at a spiritual level.
Hi Melissa - to one of the most wonderful hubbers I know - Merry Christmas and may the new year bring you everything your heart desires :)
Thank you, Shalini! That is so kind of you. :) Best wishes to you and your family as well!
Hi Melissa,
I'm very happy for you. I really have to buy the book. L.O.L
Btw, i think you know by now how beautiful you are! : )
I got the ebook. L.O.L
Hi Sheena, thanks for the kind words! :) I'm glad you downloaded the online version. I hope it's helpful in manifesting your desires!
Hi Melissa, when I read your hub on the book "Dreams from My Father", I thought that just because you have gone through that book so you thought to write a review on hubpages, but here I see yet another review. Now it gives me a feeling that you could be one of the people who I can request for hubs on different book review. Very soon I will make a request to you. Hope that's cool with you!
For this hub, I found that there are two beautiful things that you have mentioned.
Firstly, "... If you are offering a vibrational match for your desire, you will feel good, optimistic, and energized ...." It is very important to have a desire to feel good, only then you can be happy. No one can help you if you don't want to help yourself.
Secondly, "....We didn't come here to suffer or struggle with our desires, we came here to remember who we are and engage in joyful co-creation with source energy....." This is the most simple and yet so important thing that we often forget. The moment one looses faith in oneself, it's all over.
Melissa I must agree you are a very good book reviewer. Keep it up!
Thanks, packerpack! There's a bit of a backlog on the books I'm reading these days, so it might take a very long time to answer a review request for anything I haven't read, but if you're interested in books on a particular subject that I have read about, I'd be happy to help out!
This book is full of simple and practical wisdom like the two examples you gave above. There are so many things we realize about life and simply forget to practice from time to time. Whenever I start to feel sorry for myself or angry at things I can't control, a little voice somewhere inside says "reach for the joy!" and thought by thought, I find a way to climb out of that hole.
Thanks for your comment!
KCC Big Country says:
14 months ago
Congrats! I found the Abraham-Hicks material 5 years ago and it has greatly changed my life as well. I've started a website to help others learn more about the law of attraction and have a book in the works.
In the meantime, I found Hubpages and have enjoyed writing hubs.