Have you ever wondered how we "do it?" Isn't it gross? Doesn't it hurt? Do you have trouble matching your necktie to your shirt? Do you suspect that your girlfriend is a little too close her roommate? Are you confused by the difference between mousse, pomade and gel?

Do you ever find yourself wondering, "What would a gay guy do in this situation?"

Are you looking for advice with a "pink" angle?

Well now's your chance to find the answers to all your questions!

What is the gay agenda? Why DO we want to get married anyway? What about GOD? Doesn't the Bible say that you are all dirty awful people who deserve to be stoned to death? And what is it with all these closeted Republican hypocrites anyway?

No question is too silly or offensive. I promise to give your question serious consideration.

Submit your questions, comments, and issues to me via email (or comments here) and I'll get to work supplying you with FABULOUS answers.

I am 32 and I have been out since I was 21. I have been fired for being gay. I have had my heart broken. I have had sex with a woman before. I have had my share of club experiences, traveled the country, and I'm an expert on weeding out losers from the online dating field. I have been in a relationship for the past 5 years. I was raised in a religious home in the Midwest, but now live in northern California, not far from the Gay Mecca of San Francisco.

To put it simply, I've seen and done nearly everything and I can't wait to share my wisdom with you.

So bring on your questions. I dare you!