Gray Hair Is Sexy
88
Notice I didn’t just say beautiful.
That’s because I think the word beautiful has lost a lot of its value over the years. We use it for all kinds of things now, and many of them have nothing to do with my interpretation of the word. This is about sex appeal, in the strictest sense of the phrase. I truly believe gray hair can have it.
Oh, I didn’t always feel this way. I started noticing gray hair when I was about 23. My mother was almost completely gray by the time she reached 34. So I’ve been preparing for it by biting my nails and agonizing over old age setting in. And it has. I am now 31 and officially graying at the temples.
But, guess what?
Now that it’s here, I kind of like it. Actually, I like it a lot. A friend asked me if I was going to dye my hair and I said no – why should I? Men don’t, and their gray only adds to their sex appeal. Look at George Clooney.
My friend replied by telling me society views gray haired women as old, and not sexy. I paused and had a think. That couldn’t be completely correct. Could it? There had to be at least a handful of sexy women with gray hair out there in Hollywood. Women who weren’t looked upon as old but, rather, glamorous and dignified. Right?
Wrong.
I spent nearly five hours searching the internet for photos of glamorpusses with anything from a sprinkling of gray to the whole nine yards, and I came up with four results. Four. I couldn’t understand it. How could that be? And then it dawned on me: We don’t have sexy, gray-haired women running around, because they're all dying their hair.
Hello?
How are we supposed to view graying or gray-haired women as sexy, if the only visual we have is 90 year old Aunt Martha? I’d blame the media for this, but y’all women who touch your grays up every week only let them know you don’t really want to see any sexy gray-haired women. Not in the mirror, and not in the media.
Now, I realize, as we age, we want to retain our youth. I’ve been using eye-cream preemptively since my early 20’s – I’m all about retaining my looks as long as possible. The issue here, is that I don’t view gray hair as detracting from them. Mind you, I’m not opposed to color boosting your grays. L’Oreal used to make a product called Gray Chic, but as far as I can tell, it no longer exists. I’ve tried to find similar products but wasn’t successful.
However, there are still a few things you can do to naturally boost your grays.
- 1. Give yourself a nice scalp massage. Better yet, have your man give you one – that way you can relax and really enjoy it. This will keep your circulation healthy and supply your roots with the nourishment they need.
- 2. Use a shampoo and conditioner specially formulated to keep your grays in line. Vitamins and goody supplements will keep them from getting too wiry, dry and haggard. These can also help keep your hair from going bronze.
- 3. Increase your protein intake. Not a lot, just enough to feed your hair. I always notice a marked difference in my own hair when I do this. It’s not a miracle cure, but it can help.
Some people say you should change your hairstyle when it goes gray. I’ve even seen it suggested that you not let it grow past your chin. Horsehockey! Just because your hair’s turning color doesn’t mean you suddenly have to look like your grandmother. If it looks good on you with full color, it can look good without. So come on, ladies. Embrace the silver. You’ve earned the right to be sexy whether or not you’re gray. And if you believe you are, other people will, too.
xx Isabella
PrintShare it! — Rate it: up down [flag this hub]
Comments
Ooooh. I'll be sure to drop by when I've gone completely silver. ;)
So far I've been loving mine - nice little winks from the crown or temples. I've seen silver, grey, and white, so my hair ought to have some depth and highlights when all is said and done.
You should post some piccies on your blog!
I agree..My hair is on it's way to being nearly all gray and I get lots of compliments on it. It is graying in streaks which is kind of cool
Drop by my Myspace page and give me your support as I let my hair go gray :-)
Mmm. To go gray or not. I think it depends on one's facial structure, the color of the gray coming in, how you dress, wear makeup, and more, In other words the whole package. Certainly Emmylou Harris and Merle Streep look stunning; Faye Dunaway and Judi Densch less so, in my opinion. I think the more "premature" gray you are, the better it looks. But when your hair is gray and you're decidedly older as well, so to speak, it may take some work to carry it off. I've done the let it go gray thing and I get compliments, but I much prefer having some other color highlights. For now I think I will wait until and "I'm old and gray" before "going gray."
I am salt and pepper gray. My younger friends love it. My older friends love it. I think it is very attractive on anyone, who takes care of themselves. I hate seeing and obviously older woman with bright red or harshly dark hair. Let the gray show....... you have earned it. Are we all suppose to be in "breed mode"/no gray plumped up lips for our entire lives?! Men dyeing their gray hair ........... even worse. *shakes head in disgust* I do think one should be fit, dress nicely and leave the gray alone. We all age. Let's do it gracefully. It can be attractive. I am always disappointed when I see an older person with dyed hair. More important than gray hair on the outside........... Are you alive on the inside? Or is the hair dyeing to hide that you died a long time ago from within........... clinging to your youth, while being an inflexible dead person psychologically?
I was a delightful "peanut butter" color and oodles of compliments in my 40's - -
very 'NATURAL' highlighting as I called it. You just can't hide these Irish genes.
Now in my 60's - the hair is "pristine white" and I am so "WASHED OUT" and no one likes the longish hair - - and I am so tired of "short hair". What does one do?
Kat - It looks great! Good luck!
Paula - Well, I think you can give it a boost, it's just that there aren't many products out there for boosting gray right now..
Merrick - All very good points!
Eileen - Pristine white can be lovely! You just need a good styling to pull it off. I dont know what type of hair you have, but the mid length styles look great on women in their 50s and 60s. That style Meryl Streep has in that photo is fantastic, can you try that, maybe?
Gray has the sexiness of authority in it, I think.
you go, graygirls. Time to get real. Here's a new site for graygirls everywhere.
Kenny, I think you're right, very well-said.
Jane - Gray is good! ;)
I'll continue to say that, Isabella, as I'm all gray now! Till the day I dye!
Men look really sexy in gray! My doctor had gray hair ...what a dreamer!...until he dyed it ......he's dumped! lol
I have been coloring my hair since I was 25 years old. I have always admired people who let their hair gray naturally but I was too vain to try, that is until recently. I am 52 years old with a very young looking face and have decided to let the gray take over. It has been a slow process of getting hair cuts every four weeks, but I am almost there. So far the reactions have been positive. Most of my friends said they wish they had the courage to go for it too.....probably one more hair cut and I will be snow white......
Thank you for being so beautiful and real. I am 52 and I have been trying to find any information and pictures for women with beautiful gray white hair. My 2 daughters are hair dressers and they don't want me to let it go. But I have seen whats under the brown and blonde and I think its beautiful. I always wear a nice hair style and do my best to look good for my husband of 30 plus years. I watched him go gray and what a doll he has only gotten BETTER. The hardest part for me is growing it out. I like looking like a hag. Well thank you for your site I'll keep checking in to see what hair products people found and look at the pictures for insperation. Thank you Chiqui
Barbara and Chiqui - I think its wonderful that you're both letting your hair go gray - gray hair does not mean you're not sexy!! Good for you both! :))
AHHHH.....52 must be that magic age as I too am being 'brave' (??) and growing out the gray that has been there 100% since I was in my early 30's. I too encounter many different opinions - mainly from women - that say they couldn't/wouldn't do it - even my 82 year old mom! Why do people think we are 'letting ourselves go'? I am hoping I can look stunning - brighter makeup (no more running to the grocery w/out any). Baby boomers unite! I'm tired of putting smelly chemicals on my hair 2 times a month and seeing myself an others look harsh with too dark hair. I've got short hair and my daughter and I are putting in frosted highlights to get it through the growing out stage - it helps that in-between stage. I'm proud of us all.
Jennifer - Good for you! Im sure you will look beautiful! :)
Isabella, I was curious to know if you have grown out your gray and if you had any updated pictures to show it. I have also been trying to find anything on young women going gray and still there is just not anything out there. I am 31 and seriously considering growing out my white hair...I have no idea how much is white because I have been coloring my hair since I was 21. Thanks for the post.
Great role models you have there- definitely sexy women. I think Paula Deen exudes sex appeal, actually. I have to admit, though. I hate my gray strands and still keep it undercover. Maybe someday I will liberate myself.
As I am 50 something, I find mature women with gray hair very sexy. I have always found Judy Dench sexy. I think the world is ready for a new revolution: 60 will be the new 40. We mature people take care of ourselves, eat right, and exercise. Remember Tina Turner at the Grammys? That's one sexy granny. I'll gladly lift a glass of wine to salute older women who like fine wine just get better with time.
Let me share my own experience with my gray hair. I am 57 and two years ago I decided to go gray. Right now I have silver and white gray hair. It took several months to learn how to take care of them, that they would be shiny, smooth and attractive looking. I gave up some of my favorite colors, like beige, camel and green but I learned the beauty of different shades of gray, red and brown. I like to be me. I believe that a women with gray hair can be stunning and sexy.
Olga
I am 52 and proud of it! I have stopped coloring my hair and I now have natural highlights. I'm so over it. Since the big craze is everything going natural now, maybe we could say we're going "green", not gray!!!
Back in October of last year.....we had family photos taken. I had the regular chin length hair with bangs.....As I looked at the family photos and saw the gray 1 inch growth peaking out from between the caramel color hair, my daughter thought it would be a good idea to cut it off about 1 inch all over like Dame Judy Dench. I never received soooo many compliments. I was aghast and disheartened when it was cut...thinking I had lost my femininity. Low and behold with a lovely set of big hoop earrings and some product to make my hair look a little more with it, MEN of all people and WOMEN loved it! Funny the difference the cut makes. Gray forever at 51.
gray haired women look fantantic
I would add Annie Lennox to the list of women who look absolutely stunning in grey. I've always noticed women who look great with grey hair - probably bc deep down I really don't like the idea of covering my white hair with dye...And someday I plan to go grey/white.
I am 44, and I quit coloring my hair due to financial reasons. Many women tell me they admire my courage. No one looks me in the eye though when they tell me it looks good. I read Anne Kreamer's book. I had courage to go and be grey. Lately, I have been told by my children, clients, and others that I need to color it. I want to look my best and if this salt and pepper isn't it. I may have to wait until its all white - I know that looks stunning. I want to ignore others, but I also want to look great. Ugh! Any advice?
I am have been using lighter and lighter semi-perm gold to cover my gray in prep to let it go. So that it would not be as shocking a line of demarcation. I am chicken though and end up applying color before long. i cannot color now as i just got out of the hospital. The thing is...i have waist length hair. I always have. I am not prepared to go short. i guess i can't shake the fact that i will look ....Old. :0( Though i always loved how Emmy Lou Harris looks. My husband has always loved brunettes and he says i am too young to be gray (44). I just really hate coloring my hair (and I am a trained & licensed though non-practicing hair dresser.) I do remember from my color classes with Redken that there are colors for Gray hair. Ways to make Gray look wonderful - and if you think about it...regrowth would not be a problem...you could probably go for a long time before recoloring - it makes it a shade of gray that you would like - both shiney and wonderful...and you would not be trapped into doing it forever but you may feel like you like your hair better that way w/o a monthly color committment. i suspect the folks we see with LOVELY gray - color it that way. I was online tonight looking for the very same things...photos of lovely long salt and pepper hair.
By the way....any thoughts on long hair styles that would look young but still long on salt and pepper hair welcome.
I just turned 50 in January 2008 and I have medium brown hair with red highlights-ALL NATURAL and I have freckles to prove it and I have some grey coming in, more on one side than the other and I have decided that I would not color it! I think healthy hair is better than dyed hair that looks trashed, so a few greys in a healthy head of natural color is the way I am going to go. By the way cherokee girl, I am 50 and I say go salt and pepper and grow it long. Mine is at my brastrap and I am going to grow it longer and longer!!!!!
Gray is graceful and sexy look is graceful look.
Excellant daring Hub.
at 42, i decided to stop coloring my hair, which i had been coloring since my early 20's. years of coloring and perms had left my hair damaged and i didn't want to go short to have all the damage cut out. so i just let it grow.
as it grew, it grew to be more and more beautiful. it took a year until my shoulder length hair was completely gray. now it reached midback and is more silky than it has ever been in my life. i get tons of compliments everywhere i go.
I am sixty years old and have finally been successful in letting all my silver shine!! I have
always worn my hair short and now it is short and silver and I love it and so does my hubby
and my children. It makes me feel more genuine, and a bit gutsy, to stand up and be who I am. I think it's important to keep fit, eat well, exercise and stay mentally engaged. I take classes, volunteer and feel more alive than ever. Going gray helps me stay real and know that life is finite and, whether I color my hair or not, this is where I am in life, so I might as well stand up straight and show my colors (in this case, silver) :o). To all of you who feel comfortable with it -go gray - I am so happy I did. Lots of luck to all of you.
I am 50 years of age. I have let my hair go completely silver. It is a very libertating feeling.
I have had more compliments on my hair then I have ever had in my life from both men and women. I would encourage any women to give it a try.
I am 42 years old and my hair is over 75% grey. I have finally decided to let it go completely grey because I am tired of coloring my hair every 2-4 weeks. Most of my friends tell me to go for it because I still look young and the grey is not aging me but enhancing me. So, I say laadies go for it.
women with grey hair look sexy .
You forgot about Anne Bancroft the legendary Mrs. Robinson. My gray hair is like hers, a white lock of hair in from of my forehead. I have to dive it, I still didn't find the corage to let it grow, will see...
I think grey hair looks stunning,at the moment my hair is mid-brown with quite a bit of grey highlights,thats how i like to term it,i cannot to wait to go grey all over,a lot of people seem to have hangups about this issue,i like the natural look and proud of it.people are prepared to pay for highlights,thankfully i have already got mine.
I have to go grey because I've had chemo and colourant makes it break off. I have about 2 months to go before I can have the last of the dark cut off. My style is short & spikey, I'm surprised at how nice the grey is looking, and how much more comfortable I feel with my new self-image. Somehow it looks 'right'.
I HAVE A GRAY HAIR AND I DON'T KNOW HOW TO GET RED OF IT, is there anything i can do resror it to my natural hair?
Hi, Cherokee Girl; what kind of products by Redken can ENHANCE grey hair? I am 47, and sick and tired of putting chemicals in my hair. I want to work with the silver/grey, not fight it anymore. Thank you!
After yet another color job on my hair where I nearly passed out from the stinky fumes of the mess, dripped the goo on my carpet, and ruined another towel...I looked in the mirror to find my curly tresses not "cool blonde", but......blue. Yes my hair was light brownish with a sickly bluish tone to it. It made me look....dead. I looked online for support in my quest to go gray. Only thing is....I dont look as good as Emmy Lou Harris or the others pictured here. She doesnt even look that good, her picture has been touched up. But..I AM 50, newly divorced...I'm going for it. Its just hair.
Fortunately, I am one of those rare women who have never found gray hair to be anything shameful; the females in my family never felt any shame because of it, and that's how I reared my own daughter. I liked gray hair long before it became the "fashion statement" that Meryl & Helen have caused it to become. I celebrate everything about aging-- I've earned it ALL!
Although I've colored my hair for many years, it was not because of any gray hair - as a matter of fact, it was because my naturally dark hair was so drab. Now, at 55, I've had the color grow out, had my barber cut my hair down to my natural color, and lo & behold, I found silver sprinkles! I am now officially Salt & Pepper!
What I need to know know is how does one go about emphasizing the silver/gray in salt & pepper hair? I still have mostly black hair, but I'm pretty much done with hair color now that I've got silver-gray to show off.
Can someone please help me with this?
Robin, The Bronx, NY
Eileen:
Try a nice cut that suits your facial features and your personality - the older we get, the more youthful we look with a suitable cut, believe it or not. Long hair just like jet black hair is better carried off by young(er) women, but tends to make us look "witchy & haggard".
If you're one of those women who is stuck in her long hair (and maybe your man/husband is stuck on long hair) try silverizing it, especially if you're a more pale-skinned Caucasian, which might cause you to look washed out.
Try it..
Robin622
I couldn't agree more... Women who have grey / white hair I find extremely sexy. I know most of these women believe a younger man could not possible find them sexy but that is the furthest thing from the truth. Take a chance on younger men who show interest in you. You could be very surprised how many of us are out here wanting to meet a woman who is both beautiful / sexy inside and out.
Christopher
I am a proud silver haired woman of 39. If you are considering transitioning away from the colour and to the natural grey, look at this book for encouragement, "Going Gray, Looking Great!", by Diana Lewis Jewell. She also has a website where great grays share photos with each other.
I am delighted to read so many comments from other women at age 52 like me, and 50s generally, all feeling the same way and letting the grays go.
I am nearly there with mine growing out and plan to let it grow long, because thats how I like it. Ill look at putting it up etc when it gets there - just below chin level now.
What I would like some help with - my hair is very thick and tends to frizz out (this was always better when long as the weight helped), now that it is gray it is also wiry and individual hair curl out in all directions. Is there any help for this? i would like it to be smoother and less frizzy.
thanks everyone.
i am 50 and having a hard time not coloring my hair, i really would like to but, i have never seen my own mom with grey hair. what kind of products can i find to help my hair look better too when i am grey? i think eemy lou is beautifu as is paula dean and others who have gone grey. i really enjoyed reading on this site about going grey.
Ohhh to gray or not to gray.... I'm hearing you all. I am 53 and have tried to let the gray go. I have a young looking face, and my hair in front would be white like Emmy Lou's is. The back is still dark. I personally think that you can pull off gray hair younger if the cut is young and stylish (again, like Emmy Lou's) Her shag makes her white hair beautiful! She looks 20 years old in that picture, so that brings me to the next question.... to resurface or to lift.... hahaha!
Just had to chime in. I'm 44 and I've gone gray. I was coloring my hair dark brown until February of last year. I started to notice that, although I had almost no facial wrinkles, I was starting to look kind of "hard". AND, I had to touch up the roots every 2 weeks. So, I gave myself a buzz cut, right down to the wood. It wasn't easy, I felt like a freak. My best friend said I looked like a fuzzy white tennis ball. I thought I looked like Mr. Peanut Head. My mom cried when I told her what I'd done and said she wasn't old enough for me to have gray hair and that I would look awful with it. Then it started to grown. I've never gone back to coloring. My hair isn't so much gray (which sound so drab) as a gorgeous shimmering pewter / silver. I love my hair. It feels good to touch, has movement, shine and I get compliments all the time. Oh, and the last time I saw my mom, she accused me of wearing a wig. My hair is THAT gorgeous. Anyone who is interesting in transitioning to gray should check out the website www.goinggraylookinggreat.com. Diana Jewell wrote a book by the same name, and it's fab.
I am 51 and have grown out my hair so that I am about 50% gray and getting many compliments from ithe look I recently had the last cut that rid my hair of any coloring and my students wondered if I "colored" my hair. I've been using Pantene shampoo and conditioner for gray hair and it tames the wiry texture and makes the grays more silver in tone. I am also finding I need to stay away from wearing yellow based colors around my face. I stay with cooler tones that work.
My favorite part was including George Clooney in this hub! What you said is very true!
I'm 53. I've been letting myself go gray for the past 6 plus years. (I did have a few blonde streaks -- about 10 -- put in early last year but won't be doing that again as it ruined the condition of those bits of my hair without making much difference).
I was wearing it long for the first couple of years. Then I had this big 'fall out' of my hair and it became very thin so gradually I got it cut shorter and shorter. Plus my hairdresser, who is very good likes short hair on women. I had my last cut in late Feb of last year and since then have been letting it grow (I did have a fringe -- bangs cut in mid July but won't do that again). It's now down past my shoulders and the layers are growing out beautifully. Plus it's thickened up a bit -- I seem to have more hair. I've found that if I wear it up -- loosely with slide combs -- it looks very pretty on me. I also wear a black mascara and a nice gentle shade of red lipstick when I go out. The whole look is great for me. People comment on how good I look with my hair messily arranged (takes me about 5 minutes) on top of my head with soft bits hanging down. I have to 're-arrange' it a couple of times during the day (i aslo have fine hair so the slide combs tend to slip a bit).
I can also brush it straight down and it looks rather 'chic' but not 'me.'
I was sitting in a doctors waiting room and picked up an article on women with grey hair. Women from their 50s to their 80s. And there was 'me.' Only this women was in her 80s. Her look? Gray hair with mascara and red lipstick? And she looked great!
Hi there
I have had gray hair for at least 20 years now occasionaly going back to dark when someone would say I looked older with gray hair. Finding the confidence not to listen to others who have dyed hair and not always flattering in colours not complimenting their skin tone and often giving an older and harder look than the softness that gray hair can bring to the skin and the features. It also allows the wearing of lovely pastel shades and strong colours also. i find a silver rinse compliments my hair (not blue) but the very light blonde shades do nothing for me at all as I have tried them all. Being gray has given me compliments over the years that I would never consider being tempted to just go and buy a dye or listen to hairdressers who are keen to colour you up and then the roots are showing in a very shot time.
Keep your gray hair on girls - you not only suit it, you have earned it.
Liz
Ok, I'm 35 & decided to Go Gray about 8 months ago. I started by just letting the front temple area come in, but it proved too difficult with hair colorists constantly slipping some color on my gray bits! So I decided to let the lot go gray. I have to say it's looking pretty bad right now. My hair is pretty white & I've been dying it since I was 18, so frankly I've had enough with the dye! However, my freinds have been politely silent on the subject & I saw some photos recently & I look 45 not 35. I am starting to wobble. I've never really been a fan of wearing makeup every day either, but perhaps this would help. Some advice please fellow Silver Foxes!
I have been colouring my hair since I was 16 and am now 57 and back looking at this site yet again! I love my white in the front and brown at the back. My husband likes it but my daughter says it is a no no. I loved Grey Chic when it was out. The colours were great. Meanwhile I go back and forward, to grey or not to grey.
isabella,u a great.am a guy of 38 and i hv began 2 hv gray hair.am not feeling bad because there is nothin i will do t make it perfectly black.
At the age of 39 I decided I had enough of dying my hair (found my first greys in junior high school). My dad was completely grey by the age of 20, and I was the only one in the family with grey hair at that young of an age. My second husband loves grey hair, thinks its sexy so I decided to grow mine out. Got all of the dark color stripped from my hair, highlighted and lightened so it would blend (hair salon is a must for this). It took me over a year to grow it out and when I started it was half way down my back. About 6 months in I went and had it cut to just above my shoulders and love it. I waited about 8 months and had the rest of the color cut off. I have been all grey for over a year now and letting it grow out again. I love it and get a lot of complements about the color. I look at it this way, nobody else has this color, it's my own personal color. Let go, be yourself.
Thanks to all of you. I have never colored my hair. I told my sons it takes courage to stay natural. I love my hair, but have felt that others have started to treat me older than I really am, 57. Reading all these wonderful comments has renewed my spirit to continue my quest to embrace my silver streaks...
I recently found some pictures of my old brunette self and realized I liked my silver locks so much more...and yes they speak to who I am, who I have become, and who I am to be...Courage is a wonderful place to dwell....
Kudos to ALL of You Lovely Silver Foxettes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
JamesRay says:
2 years ago
I agree. I think gray can be very sexy.