Fear presents more than one face. There is the unhealthy fear that overshadows your whole life to debilitate and isolate you from living, restrict you as a person and prevent you from enjoying your existence. Healthy fear on the other hand can provide safety parameters and guide you into a less dangerous existence.

The government fears for the safety of its' military forces, its' people using the roads, the health of the nation, anarchy, uprisings - all justified fears that if left unaddressed could lead to a complete lack of safety in matters of health and security. The government has also been known to use the fear factor to control voting outcomes. Projecting our fears to assuage theirs! These fears lead in the main to wise laws. In some ways the infliction of a dictatorial governmental fear onto the public can be seen as a form of bullying. Fearing outcomes, to be arrived at via the breaking of laws, is of course another fear that brings about behaviors that seek to contain the wildest and most desperate among us.

A mother fears for the safety of her child and introduces a series of do's and don't into her household until said child can reason for itself and is permitted to make its' own mistakes. A father will normally aid and abet the mother in this process, but being of the male gender will normally be more adventurous and allow the child some leeway to experience the fear of finding out what happens if they ignore reasoned suggestions.

If a fear is caused early in life and not faced then unfortunately this identified fear can grow unreasonably to curb one's enjoyment of living. In my early years I experienced three car accidents within a 12 month time frame. In my first accident the car rolled down a slippery slope and left me with my head through the rear glass window onto the grass outside; people were urgently calling my name while bizarrely the music was still playing. The second was the typical sandwich accident with the car from behind coming too fast around the bend to push us into the car in front. The third was the most scary involving a steep Brindabella mountain side, a sports car, and a very narrow road with a large family station wagon coming down the mountain as a speed definitely faster than the allotted 15 miles per hour. The outcome was that the car that clipped us did not stop, and we were partially pushed over the side of the mountain indeed left by the other driver with our front wheel and passenger side door half over the side of the mountain. As the passenger I had to get out of the car very gingerly, a little red Honda sports, all the while hoping that I was not going to take a wrong turn down to my death instead of up to safety. The result of these traumas is that I definitely do not like to travel along mountain roads on the steep side of the road! This fear limits me. I am quite unable to enjoy the view, the tops of the trees, the mists or indeed the beauty of place. I just have a requirement to be off that mountain road as soon as is practicable.

But as I said earlier, fear can be a healthy safety device if listened to. I remember another incident which could have had unhealthy results if the fear factor had not crept in. It occurred when I attended the wedding reception held at a restaurant in town. I happened to live in the same suburb as the bride and groom and was asked at the end of the evening if I minded giving their house guest a lift. Happily I obliged although I had not spoken with this person at all during the course of the evening celebrations. I had observed however as we left the restaurant that said house guest had bought a number of bottles of champagne which he tucked under his arm. We arrived at the house where he deftly leaned over the steering wheel of the car to remove my keys. He informed me as he went inside complete with champagne bottles, that if I wanted my keys back I would have to come into the house to get them. So much for an act of kindness. I asked a couple of time for my keys to be returned to me. Requests denied. Thoroughly annoyed and fearful by this stage I said that if they were not returned I would put my hand on the car horn and not take it off until all the neighbors came out to investigate. At this point the keys were roughly thrown through the car window into my face, relieved I drove home. Next day I wondered if the horn worked without the key inserted and the engine on. They did not! This I would call a healthy fear - a small incident where a fear fuelled imagination achieved good outcome.

With fear good outcomes are not always the go. Fear can personally cripple, limit and break down one's living skills. However if you can face your fear you must by definition become a better and wiser person.

copyright: a.a.gallagher 2008

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