Today, I'm on my third day in a row of significantly interrupted sleep. This will mean nothing for the quality of my day, other than I'll be cranky as all get-out and drinking too much coffee to try not to be too tired to think before I crab about something. I worry, though, about what it means for my daughter.

Naturally, she is the reason I'm sleep deprived today. . .and was yesterday, and the day before. She's not sick, no fever, no sign of even a sniffle. It's not fear; she's got a nightlight, and a humidifier to give a little white noise to mask the sounds of the city where we live. She always has her favorite blanket and her choice of stuffed animals without number to cuddle. And all that aside, she isn't waking up crying or distressed in any way. She's just waking up. . .at 3am, or maybe 4am. . .and not inclined to go back to sleep.

Now don't misunderstand. Suzi is my pride and joy. She's a two-year-old Virgo with my strawberry blond hair and blue eyes, and her dad's full cheeks and hilarious orneriness. She's BRILLIANT, I tell you! Knows her alphabet, counts to twenty, knows eight basic colors, and is really starting to talk up a storm, giving replies that clearly mimic us in the funniest ways. Really, she oughta be in pictures. . .and if I find out that America's Funniest is still handing out prize money, she will be.

Attachment parenting and co-sleeping are rather vogue right now. I studied a bit about attachment parenting and decided that I had a natural inclination toward as much of that as I could do. But co-sleeping was a no-go, absolutely. I loved her from minute one, but I decided before I even met my husband that I was not going to put my family through the trials with which many of my girlfriends struggled. Kids as old as 8 or 9, still spending half the night in bed with mommy and daddy. . .no one's getting a truly restorative night's sleep like that.

So I put Suzi in her own bed from the very start. As a result, she has been sleeping perfectly well on her own, with her only issues being when she's sick. That is, until now.

For the last three nights running, and for a few nights in a row about two weeks ago, Suzi's decided that if she can't sleep, then neither should we. Having recently mastered doorknobs, she just comes on in and lets us know she's awake. We try letting her sleep with us for just a few minutes, and it quickly becomes plain that she's not interested in going to sleep. She wants to talk, look out the window, and play the tent-in-the-bed game. So daddy and I take turns for the next two hours or so escorting her back to bed, tucking her in (again), kissing her goodnight (again), and telling her to go to sleep and we'll see her in the morning. Again and again. She put us through this routine no less than four times last night. I still adore her, but today, she's a little insomniac freeloader that is so lucky that I'm not trying to raise her alone.

This is how I've discovered that my jealous girlfriends have managed to curse me. I made fun of them for not being able to hold the line and put their children in their own beds, assuring themselves of quality sleep. I suppose this is my come-uppance. Despite my mostly successful efforts to walk the walk after talking the talk, my child is trying to change the sleep rules on me. And I don't even have a clue as to why. There's only one possible trigger, and that's daddy's schedule change. His old job had him here with us for breakfast and morning TV time, but now he has a new 8am-5pm routine. He's home more now because of it, but that doesn't seem to matter to Suzi. What apparently matters to her is that things are different. If that isn't the trigger, then I'm at a loss as to what's got my little darling losing sleep.

So, I'll be doing the only things I can do; holding the line, putting her back to bed over and over again, and looking for some way to vent my frustration without taking it out on Suzi. And these really are the only things to do! I've done the research, and even have first-hand anecdotal evidence that this is fairly common for toddlers. It's either a.) keep putting baby back to bed till baby stays there, b.) sacrifice your marital bed to the baby because it's "easier," or c.) just stay up and start raising baby on the graveyard shift!

The choice I'll make is plain, I'm sure.  What I'm NOT sure of is whether I'll maintain relative sanity for the time it will take to get my girl sleeping through the night in her own bed again.  But time will certainly tell.