I must tell you that I know everything about Ms Britney Spears.  And it's not because I want to.  My loving and thoughtful and career minded and educated bride seems to worship this pop-icon-diva-trainwreck.

I've been roped into watching news clips on Britney Spears, reading articles, watching youtube videos, etc, etc. ad nauseum.  I may even be an "expert" myself, without actually knowing.

When the love of my life, an addict for so called celebrity news, is asked why, she responds,  "It's like watching a train wreck.  I'm an educated woman with a career and I just can't turn away!"

To me that's not a reason to stalk Britney's every move via the news and internet.  After digging deeper my britney-spears-curiously-stalking-from-afar wife says, "She makes me feel better about my life."  There it is folks.

My wife and all of the other celebrity watcher stalkers who unwittingly support the paparazzi have continued to keenly watch and follow the Britney Spears meltdown saga because It Makes Them Feel Better About Their Own Lives. 

Somewhat ironic isn't it?

Which brings me to the point of my story.

As I mentioned, I've been exposed to the britney spears saga relentlessly for a number of years now.  As such, I've seen her go from spunky teenager to seductive vixen to flash dancer to relationship destroyer to bounceback married lady to mother of two children to divorcee to coochie flasher to party animal to mentally incapacitated overweight millionairess trailer trash to straitjacket patient to....RESURRECTED FROM THE DEAD.

I am completely convinced beyond a shadow of a doubt that Britney Spears is a Zombie, i.e. the Walking Dead.

How else can her career have been resurrected?  How else could she be winning awards?  How else could she get her body back?  How else could she launch another worthless (my  opinion) album?  

We all watched that chick melt down.  Her talent is questionable.  She's made some really strange decisions.  She's been used by some questionable people.  She's hounded relentlessly.  She was on drugs.  People did some really weird control stuff to her...and what? 

I'm all for people bouncing back.

In this case, I don't think Britney Spears exists anymore, except for a walking, talking, singing, dancing automaton zombie that exists to make money for the so-called music industry.

I feel sorry for the chick... But, we all make choices.

sidenote: According to the movies, Zombies like to eat fresh human flesh.  I wouldn't get too close to Ms. Spears.