Introduction

This is the first in a series of hubs about parenting based on wisdom and practice. My children are grown or almost-grown, and I teach high school teens. I have opinions about what can bring about desired behavior, yet I don’t portend to have always practiced the right strategies! Much of my early parenting was usurped in busy-ness, but my hope is that implementing these tips will save you time and energy, and benefit your family.

Values

We are sick of tossing around the “family values” football. But at the precipice of “empty nestdom,” I fully understand the significance of a genuine destination, and the ease with which one can parent with a focused set of standards. You can put a jigsaw puzzle together better if you have the replica propped before you, just as you can better gauge a race if you know the location of the finish line…

How do you answer this question from your child, “But why do I have to do that?” Save yourself power struggles and tongue tied moments by retrieving the response from your predetermined value manifesto. Each occasion to answer is an opportunity to further engrave valuable inscriptions in your son or daughter’s character.

In crystallizing my own values, I think ours would look something like this...(feel free to insert “Because…” as you commence reading each one...)

• We are loyal and faithful to those who have our best interests at heart.
• We value our spiritual, physical and mental health.
• We abide by rules and laws.
• We treat people, property and money with respect.
• We give our best efforts.
• If we fall off of our horses, we acknowledge what we have learned, make amends the best we can, and get back on.

Determining and mobilizing values in a clear and focused manner has definite advantages. Allowing for "slip-ups" takes the sting out of mistakes and failures.

What would your manifesto look like? Suggest that your children make a family crest, or pick a famiiar tune and create a family song!

• Caught Ya Doing Good!
• Uniqueness! Hooray!
• Spare the Mouth, Empower the Child!
• Consistency and Follow Through
• Teach Critical Thinking
• Diffuse with Humor! And Play!