Common Causes of Divorce

There are many reasons why people want a divorce. It could be easy to put a reason for the sake of supporting a divorce petition. In reality though, there may be hundreds of unique reasons why certain couples just want out. Sometimes, there is more that just one reason. Here are only some of the possible causes of divorce:

Communication Problems

Communications problems between a couple may possibly exist even long before they tie the knot. Expectations may not have been made clear or certain issues that could affect a marriage were not brought up. Discussing feelings about aspects that are personally important is also crucial but may not always be practiced by couples. Some couples may put little weight on pre-marital issues only to realize during marriage that they should have clearly set things in black and white or that hey should have been better listeners. Communication issues before marriage can get worse after getting married.

Financial Issues

Money or aspects related to it is of course a possible cause of disagreement between couples. Married couples could squabble over such issues as shared financial responsibility, unequal financial status, undisclosed financial state, over spending and lack of financial support. Evidence suggests though that money is not always the sole or primary cause of divorce. Nonetheless, it is still a significant factor. Again, the lack of communication over financial issues is the real culprit here and not money per se.

Forms of Abuse

There are many forms of abuse, all of which are possible causes of divorce. This does not just include intentional and habitual physical battery. Abuse may also come in the form of sexual abuse and emotional abuse. One partner may actively seek to degrade his/her partner through harsh language.

Drug and alcohol abuse as well as excessive gambling that is becoming detrimental to the marriage may also be used as a form of abuse. There may be no physical or verbal abuse but the other partner would understandably have a difficult time managing finances and daily life with an addicted spouse.

Marital Infidelity

The law on marriage that is common on monogamous societies states that marriage must be a mutually exclusive arrangement between two parties. This is of course unless both partners privately consent on their own to see other people while remaining married to each other. Otherwise, one may seek to divorce a spouse if evidence of infidelity is clearly obtained.

Sexual Problems

Sex is an essential aspect of marriage. Couples are expected to consummate or perform the act. That is unless a person knows and accepts before marriage that one partner has some sexual problems. In some cases, sexual dysfunction or disinterest may begin after tying the knot. If a couple is unable to resolve this, it may become a reason for divorce.

Incompatibility

This is often cited as one of the causes of divorce. There are however numerous kinds and forms of incompatibility. A couple may be incompatible in anything and everything. They may not be able to find a common ground sexually, intellectually and emotionally. In cases of incompatibility, it might just be unbearable to live life with someone you just can't fit with.

Steps on How to Get a Divorce

Filing for a divorce can be a highly challenging undertaking. And the task can become more daunting when you do not know where to start and how to get a divorce. If you are filing for a divorce, there are things that you need to take care of to make the process as smooth as possible.

Here are some things to consider before starting the process on how to get a divorce:

• Before you begin the process of how to get a divorce, make sure that you have all of your personal and business paperwork together. You will need to take care of certain things. If you have joint properties, like a house, you will need the deed or the mortgage contract. If you have joint debts, you will need the papers and documents for these. You will also need other documents like checking account records, retirement plan papers, and others. Place all of these in one file.
• Think about how you want to divide your joint properties. By the time that you will already be filing the divorce papers, unless a certain material possession is noted in the divorce decree, it is most likely that you have no legal standing if a dispute arises later on.

When you have settled the two concerns above, you are now ready to go to the next steps in how to get a divorce.

Filing a Petition for Divorce

The first step in how to get a divorce is to file a petition. Even in cases when both parties agree in getting a divorce, one party will have to be the one to file a petition with the court to specify the request for the divorce. The petition will contain the grounds for the divorce, which may vary depending on the jurisdiction. In general, all jurisdictions permit no-fault grounds. However, there are a number of states that permit fault grounds for divorce. You can ask your lawyer about the fault grounds available in your state.

Temporary Orders for Support and Custody

The party who depends on the other for financial support or will take custody of the children can ask the court for temporary orders for child support and custody. Usually, the temporary order is granted within a few days and continues until such time that a court hearing is started. If the party asking for the temporary order for child support and custody is the one filing for the petition to divorce, he or she should file them both at the same time. If the party who is asking for the temporary order is not the one who filed for a petition, he or she should file the request for a temporary order the soonest possible time.

Filing the Proof of Service of Process

The spouse who files for a divorce is required to file a proof of service of process, which is a document that indicates that the other party has been given a copy of the divorce petition. If the petition to file for a divorce is a decision that is agreed upon by both parties involved, it is recommended that the spouse who files for the complaint be the one to arrange for service of process to the other spouse's lawyer. However, there may be times when a process server will have to be the one to deliver the papers.

Filing a Response to the Petition for Divorce

After the spouse who was sent the petition for divorce receives the papers, he or she will need to file a response to the petition. In the response, the receiving party can dispute the grounds stated in the petition, that is, if the divorce was filed with emphasis on fault grounds. The response can also assert a defense to the grounds or the facts described in the petition. Other issues, like disagreement as to the division of properties, child support or custody, should also be stated in the response to the petition for divorce.

Negotiating Sticky Issues

In cases when the issues are not satisfactorily agreed on, a negotiation of differences may ensue. For this purpose, the court may schedule settlement meetings that will attempt to motivate both parties to arrive at a final resolution with regards to issues brought up. Other matters to be discussed in the negotiations should also include property division and spousal support.

Going to Trial

People are often advised against going to trials as the process will take longer, is more costly, and have less positive outcomes. However, this step in the process involved in how to get a divorce becomes necessary when contested issues cannot be resolved during negotiation.

Order of Dissolution

The last step in how to get a divorce involves the Order of Dissolution. This order ends the marriage and provides details on the division of the property and debts, child support and custody, among other matters. Upon compliance of all requirements and both parties have given their consent, the judge will give his or her approval. In some cases, the court will issue an Order of Dissolution after the trial ends.

"Divorce should always be the last recourse..."