OK, so I chose a controversial topic but it's been on my mind for years and I never spoke out because I was unclear on many facts or supposed facts. I have been reading, watching and learning so much about this country I call home. The more I learn, the more I get scared and discouraged. America is a great country for many reasons but it's cons are more then pros it seems. Ultimately we have our government to blame and only faith to fall back on.

I watched many sobbed love stories in my lifetime and never cried or felt mushy. I've watched movies of families getting slaughter to slaves getting beaten and a nerve never struck. I always thought I was a bit cold inside, but that was until recently. Last night I watched JFK (by Oliver Stone) and basically witnessed JFK's murder via real footage and I was furious because of what Americans and the world abroad was lead to believe. It wasn't until Robert Kennedy got shot that I finally cried for someone in a movie. It took a second brother to get shot on national television for me to bitch up and start crying.

Now I know a lot of you out there might not believe that there was ever a conspiracy. For you skeptics, I offer you facts and not emotions. I didn't cry because I got 5 brothers and can relate. Nor did I cry because his children got to watch their father's heads get blown off on TV. I cried because I had just learned what fascism was. I cried because JFK, Martin Luther King Robert Kennedy, John Lennon and so many people like them had all died striving for change. I cried because I now see a pattern and our government hasn't changed much as far as war is concerned. Whether it's here in America or across a sea, we stay at war just to survive economically. If you know about the facts then you know what I'm talking about. If you know the facts then you know Kennedy was going to pull them troops out Vietnam and the price was nothing compared to the price on his head. If you know the facts then you know why Jack Ruby did what he did. If you know the facts then you know why American and British troops are in Iraq. If you know the facts then you know about the lies. This democracy (supposedly) stuff is hard to come by, and I mean that internationally. All over the world people have been dying for standing up for many. American Government has a bigger influence over any other country. I keep learning and keep learning and I tell you I'm scared. I'm scared because I feel like JFK or Martin Luther King. I feel like I want to stand up and reach out to help millions of people. I want to speak out and fight for some rights, f*** yeah, but I'm scared. I'm scared because death is for certain when you go against your government's policies. I'm scared because I'm a writer, (rapper, of all things) and I can only write about the knowledge within. Now I can only write about what I believe in but that seems to be a popular way to end your life. I'll stick to my rapping about my war here in these streets. I'll defend my purpose but speak out, sorry. Call me a sucker or a bitch because I'm scared but I wouldn't care. I really, really, really want to raise my son. When that's said and done with then maybe I'll do it or maybe the world will be a better place. Maybe the world won't even exist at all. If I (or we) survive to see the day when those Kennedy files are released to the public in the 2028 (if you know your facts) then maybe I'll have a change of heart. For now I will just believe. For now I will just keep learning the facts, learning about more people who died for what they believed in. Conspiracies from America, its why some other countries hate us. Whether its politics or religion, you better not believe, or someone will get you. I am learning too many facts at an alarming rate that by the time I know it all will be a change man, but for now I'll just raise my son.