Crooked Mouth
77Crooked does not mean a crook.
I have been thinking of writing about this subject for some time now and just want to make sure it is presented in a way that will not be disparaging or offend anyone who may read it. I have always watched a persons mouth when they talk and have noticed through my life the many differences in lips, teeth and the expressions one's mouth can make. There is a lot of emotion that exudes from one's mouth and one that has intrigued me has been the crooked mouth.
My surname is supposedly derived from this very subject. I personally do not believe the legend but I give it to you now. It originated with one of my great grandfathers way back in Scotland and his name was Dugald of Lochawe. I think he was my 37th great-grandfather. He was given the nickname "Cam Beul" since he apparently had a crooked mouth and was prone to speak out of one side of it. I think we all have known someone like him. Now Cam Beul in Scot Gaelic means curved, or crooked mouth. Well I reckon old Dugald was so loved by the clan they all adopted this nickname as their own surname and it gradually became Campbell and the clan held on to it even beyond the land of Argyll. This legend has been disputed by many but it is a wonderful family tale.
Greta Van Susteran Oh my
Jennifer Griffin not too bad
Some people we know
Now I have a few personalities that has this trait of my Clan's namesake. The mouth that is this crooked has just driven me nuts and I can hardly stand to watch them talk. I personally can't fathom ever kissing a mouth this crooked. Now don't get me wrong, they are all probably wonderful people, but why so many on just one news channel? Of course I saved the worst of crooked mouths for last and he moves his mouth in such strange ways as he speaks. I get a kick out of watching him talk, I like him, it's just the mouth that is so strange.
Do you remember when we were introduced to Greta? Oh my god. Her mouth is so bad for a woman and I just can't watch her ever. She did kind of get prettied up after joining Fox, but the mouth just don't fit.
Jennifer is another one that drives me nuts, but I like her and she has put herself in harms way over there in Israel. I do respect her a lot, but the mouth thing again. Oh well, tell me what you think.
I only hope I don't get sued! So Jennifer, Greta and Dick , in case you see this I do like you all and this is just all in fun.
Dick Morris
PrintShare it! — Rate it: up down flag this hub
Comments
Hi jiberish, my I never knew that! She must have been young, but she was a mess during the OJ trial regardless of her crooked mouth. She's a good talker but I don't always agree with her opinions.
Rawlus, there are very few people anywhere with whom I agree 100%, but then that's what makes the world go round.
I'll never forget the bad guy (I forget his name) from Key Largo. He's the guy Warner Brothers' Looney Toons always made fun of, as he was always a gangster named Bugsy..."Yeah, see, yeah!" He had the most crooked smile in the history of crooked smiles.
ha ha i am amused at the thought how one cannot kiss a crooked mouth ha ha
Hehe, jiberish I don't seek agreement in all things, but does Dick's mouth do anything for you? Have you watched him as he talks? I guess I'm just too weird about it, but it drives me almost insane so I now watch his eyes. LOL
Hi dohn, I believe you are referring to E. G. Robinson, yeah he had a weird mouth too with those lips and cigar. It was of a rubbery consistency too. LOL I was amazed as a child that he never lost that cigar as he spoke. thanks dohn
Hi ya bingskee, glad to amuse you then. Is it just me? LOL I guess I'm fortunate old Dugald must have been kissed by a lassie. hehe thanks now
LOL, I have never noticed crooked mouths before...now I'm going to be all eyes!
Hi Ash. Ya never noticed them before huh? Well they are among us. LOL have fun now. thanks dear hugs and peace, CC
I'm with Feline Prophet, now I'll be staring at mouths for days. LOL, I got a giggle out of this! :D
LOL k@ri. Glad to give you a giggle. have a good day now. LOL
ralwus - lol you're mind swims in strange waters! We have a woman like that in th YooKay - Anne Robinson. Not only does she have a crooked mouth but it's so tiny!
Weird ;)
Hey FD, then I am not the only person who watches the mouth. LOL Oh I may drink strange waters now and again, but swim in? well maybe I do. LOL
Funny lil pet peeve to have. Tom Cruise has a interesting smile to me due to one of his front teeth align perfectly in the crest of his upper lip. (It's all off center). What about Lyle Lovitt (now theres a whole unique definiton to facial feature) lol... Thanks for the laugh, Mr. Creamy! lol :D
You are so funny....I don't know anyone who talks with a crooked mouth but my Step-Brother always smiled a crooked smile. And it was kinda creepy!!
I am glad I don't do that! People always stare at my mouth...no one can get past my pout !
Seems to me you are supernaturally observant. I do have a crooked smile but I don't think I talk sideways. LOL.
That would be too strange to look in the mirror and talk.
:D
Only you could have thought of this topic lol, loved it and hope you are well !
Yes Invictus, these two fit right in also. LOL yeah, creamy. hehe I do notice the teeth as well. I think Dick M is a smoker.
Pachuca dear you have a lovely mouth and I do notice all mouths. I think it is the first thing I observe. Yeah I know what you mean about crooked smiles too. hugs dear.
Am I Raven? Not really, it's just a wee quirk I have, always did have. I find it useful now as I am losing more and more of my hearing. I tend to lip read more. I have observed my mouth in the mirror to see if I talk crooked, but I am naturally biased so I say no. LOL
Well Art, I never run out of ideas. LOL Glad ya enjoyed it, now go watch some crooked speak. hehe same to ya friend.
Ralwus, very few people have fully symmetrical features. That is to say, for most of us the left side of our face is NOT a perfect mirror image of the right side. You may notice it more in mouths, but if you study the faces you will see that other features are affected by the asymmetry as well.
Well hi ya Aya. yes being artistic this I know too well. I'm just sill I guess. My face is crooked along with some other bits. LOL like my mind
Ha, and I thought I was the only one, AND I thought you looked at feet first. (I still owe you a pic, dont I?) What about the people with upside down smile? They are smiling, but the corners of thier mouth go down. like a frown. that has always bugged me. And Maria Shriver...sheesh...OH!! And I hate it when people's mouth's move when I am talking,like they are saying what I am saying at the same time. It makes me forget whayt I am saying..I really cant stand that.
Hi dennise. Well I look at the toes if they are exposed. LOL Yes you do, I need to do my toe hub again, need some good pix. So you are like me in this respect. Yes I too have noticed the frowny smiles and my one brother-in-law not only moves his mouth along with me as I speak but I can hear him repeating my words in anticipation of what I'm going to say next. LOL drives me nuts also. I do have fond memories of Herman Munster[Fred Gwyne], his mouth was so rubbery and evocative. thanks for stopping by.
very nice hub different type
LOL it is, but it is one of my 'things', thanks dear.
I am now all eyes on mouths... nicely written.
LOL, I know what you mean Rebecca. thanks
hee hee hee...this is actually very well written. I too have a sensitivity to people's smiles, although crooked teeth are down on the list under missing teeth and grillz. oh boy.
Thank you again cosette. Well written or not it is nice and brief and to the point. Yeah, bad teeth in any form is another. Some just were born that way and many were just neglected. I can live with crooked teeth, even buck teeth to a point, but Dick Morris' convoluted lip thing is just way out there. You never know it until he speaks. Nice guy though.
Dick Morris does drive me crazy when he speaks--and yes, crooked mouth and speaks out of one side of it from time to time, but how else could you explain him being a "Republican" and working for the Clintons at one time.
Hi Pamela. I am pleased to meet you. Hehe yes I often wondered about that myself, but he did do a great job consulting the President dint he? Thanks now for stopping by.
Love these observations! I notice these type of things too and then can't focus on what the person is saying :-) That's not always a bad thing...
Hi Aqua, nice to meet you Aqua. Isn't it funny? Are we strange for that? LOL Thanks for stopping by now. And No I guess sometimes it is a good thing like you say.
OMG a mouth expert. Charles 'The Ralwus' Crooked-Mouth, that's some funky name. lol
LOL hi ya Pacal, I was just going to sign off for the night. I will sleep on this as my final comment and remember the chuckle you gave me. Funky indeed. Nice to meet ya and thanks for stopping by. g'nite now.
Herman Munster!!!Oh yes, but that was a loveable frowny mouth. :) I was going to take a picture for you yesterday, when I realized I have been wearing my sandals all summer, and right now, my toenails are quite disgusting. Due to a long rather traumatic weekend, I am now this new person, btw, and I am about to go take a long bath, and maybe send you clean toe pics later. Hope you are well, and I like your new avitar.
I do love to visit you when you start on a topic ever curious, but I thought that you were giving compliments and sensual connotations about the mouth, but ah, you have a peeve to discuss! I think a person's mouth and smile are just those features to a face I find most intriguing as well!
Well now, looky here all new and spritzed up. haha Love it. Now you b sure to get that picture to me I need it. See ya in a minute.
Hi ya Aidy. I love to have you visit me too. Yeah, I have always been drawn to the mouth first. Funny my surname came from that isn't it? LOL thanks now I got to come yer way soon too. peace
You do come up with the oddest topics, ralwus! There are lots of crooked mouths where I come from, mostly folks too cheap to get sunglasses, so in the summer they talk with one eye squinted totally shut and the other just barely open.
But whatever it says about me, I fell for a couple of crooked mouth blokes. One (R.I.P) had the cutest single dimple because of it. The other...well, suffice to say kissing a crooked mouth has certain advantages that a symmetrical mouth does not. ;D
Well Jama, I'm an oddball. hehe Now I hope you understand this is all just in fun, and we can do that with celebrities, right? Have you never watched Joe Cocker perform? I could go on, and on about him. He made an indelible impression one day at Woodstock on so many. John Balushi did a great impression of him. It takes all kinds doesn't it to make a world. I just never saw this through your eyes. Squinting eyes would make a good hub too, shades of Popeye. thanks now, peace CC
You know, I might have noticed someone's mouth being crooked but just never paid further attention to it. That's an original topic for sure, lol. Makes for interesting reading material.
Hi EC, so nice to meet you. Thanks for stopping by and commenting. Yes and it's fun, I think so. Surprised someone like Whoopi hasn't brought it up.
Wow C.C thank goodness I have the most luscious lips in the world ROFL. xxox
Hi Deb. Hope you're doing better dear. IMO your lips are not the only luscious things you have. xoxox
Hey C.
Crooked or not, it's what comes out of the mouth that matters...I think :D
Hi Cris. Yes you are so right. LOL
Hmmm...any of your family member present with a crooked mouth? I'm sure you'll enjoy a small conversation with them.
Yes May, this thing is in our genes. We have family members with that trait and joke about it. No problem at all.
Nobody in my family with a crooked mouth, but have many in my family that give me a lot of mouth!
Hi Cindy! Good to see you about. Yes, I have heard you talk of that. LOL I think you may be good at that too. hehe
Ah, CC, me? Never, only good things come from this mouth!
Well, OK. Just don't point it at me when you're pissed. OK? LOL Ants in yer pants yet?
Sorry but I'm not familiar with any of these people. I guess I have an excuse being from Australia. Strange but accurate observation about people nevertheless.
Hi awsydney. Well, they're not all that important as they think they are, 'cept for Jennifer maybe. I have the utmost respect for her. Just having some fun is all. Thanks now.
If I ever meet you in person, I'm wearing a black veil, a long-sleeved coat that reaches my ankles, gloves and boots. (Then you'll probably write a hub about women who dress weird. Just more grist for your mill.)
Haha Margaret,I have a hub about a woman in a long black veil. I need to put it up for Halloween. Dear, this is only a roast ya know? Only in jest. I don't try to be mean and yer just so pretty. thanks, do you have fat ankles?
Hi, Ralwus. I look at people's teeth. Are we weird, or what?
Naaaah...we're just interesting!
Nice to meet you habee. I do also and I don't know if we are or not. Very interesting I think. hehe thanks now and do come again.
Hi
I kinda got that most of what you write is in jest. As for me, I hardly ever wear a veil. Yeah, I do have fat ankles, so that's why the long coat. I'll be waiting for your story about the woman in the black veil.
Haha, OK Margaret. I will have to hunt that down in my files just for you. I think it is named Limbo. I was just jesting, yes. When don't I? LOL
Hi! never been so aware of this crooked mouth. Thanks for this hub.
Hi ladyeagle, so glad to meet you and thanks for commenting.
Just great ralwus! Now you've given me something ELSE to be obsessive compulsive about. Before this, the "crooked mouths" I've always looked out for have been "figuratively speaking."
Hahaha, so sorry lgc. I never thought about that. LOL Thanks for stopping by now. I must from now on consider these things. sheesh! peace CC Stay away from Dick or you will go nuts,
I am reading your work backwards now, so I'll be seeing you as you are and reverting back to from wence you came....what I love about your work is that I can get a cup of coffee and a fur wrap, sit by the fireplace and it's like having a relaxing conversation about any old thing...and as always you are a delight to spend time with.
I love your approach dear and I love you! all I can say is, Little Toothpicks. thanks so much
the crooked mouth syndrome! Ha! and I notice it for some reason speshully on women on tv - but do you also notice in movies & tv people's extra extra white teeth? It bothers me to the point that it can ruin a good movie sometimes. just bein so picky - Now I'm gonna be your fan so I'll get to read all your marvlous writin - Thankyou for providin some relief from all the Hub seriousness!
Helloe SoftCornHippo, yes I have noticed th e teeth, so artificial isn't it? Thanks for reading and I try not to be too serious. Much obliged.
You crack me up!!! The thoughts that go through that head of yours is unfathomable!! You must have at least, oh, idk....a dozen personalities!!LOL!! Not a bad thing, makes for very intriguing stories!! I'll have to say, as an ex- fashion photographer, I of course notice the mouth too, as both the mouth and eyes are what makes great "Beauty Models." The "Cover Girl" types. But....have you ever noticed, I'm sure you have Drew Barrymoore's mouth. When she speaks, it is slightly crooked, but I believe her mouth is one of her great attributes to her beautiful face. Just an observation. Thanks for the fun read. Now I'm on to the next personality.LOL!! Blessings!
Do I really Kim? LOL My head spins at times to tell the truth and I take a lot of meds too, plus my sippin' whiskey. I mebbe do have a disorder of that kind, never really thought about it. Drew is a beauty and yes, I have noticed. Thank you for reading.
Hey Ralwus great piece clever and unique, along with an intriguing profile pic, is that really you? There is something appealing about a female with a crooked mouth to me and it is less so for a man, though still there's something to both. It's as if with those people you're getting a curve ball. For women on the other hand, any reason to focus on their mouth makes me forget what I was looking at them for in the first place!
Hi Ben, nice to meet you and thanks for stopping by. Aww, that man in the avatar is just a nut and only a youngster. I'm much better looking. ;P Yes, I love a woman crooked mouthed or more symmetrical, it's all the same really. Yes some men I have known with a crooked mouth were devious in nature. Thanks for the comment. CC peace
Something creepy about a crooked smile. It's like they are only smiling with half the face so it seems very false. However, just a crooked mouth suggests neuroligical impairment. (Does a total inability to spell, even with spell check indicate some kind of impairment?)
You are right on that assessment Dolores. Spelling? I don't know, but my wife suffers from it also. LOL Thanks for visiting.
Some people think a crooked smile on a man is sexy
Hi Cindy. I reckon that leaves me out. LOL
I don't think I could work up any kind of desire to kiss Dick Morris, but as for the other two... I wouldn't let a little ole sideways curvature of the mouth slow me down at all! Nice work, CC. You bring genuine good cheer to HubPages.
Me either NW. Well, in a pinch I might do that with Jennifer, but Greta, I don't know yet. I could just put a flag over her face huh? Thanks my man. Salude!
Hi Ralwus. Just snooping around and found your quirky Hub. You are a hoot..enjoyed this one > :/
Hi Green, am I really? thanks a lot. bye now.
ralwus,
Too funny! I think my smile is weird, but I always prefer a smile than a scowl :) Holly
LOL, crooked smiles are OK. I hate my teeth anymore. Merry Christmas now.
jiberish says:
5 months ago
Good Hub. I would just like to add that Greta had a stroke, hence the crooked mouth. Dick on the other hand.....