Date Killers

So you’ve asked the lady out, she said yes and it seems to you that the hard work is done. Not so. Trust me. The first few dates are crucial to leaving a good impression, showing something of yourself and making sure she says yes in the future. I have spoken to many women who have dated for many years and compiled some information that I have mixed with my own experience. The ultimate goal of this article is to get her to see you in the best light possible and to help you be yourself in the best possible way
You have asked her out. She said yes. Now what do you want from her? Just a casual acquaintance? A more serious relationship if all goes well? Once you decide what you want you will know better how to proceed. And let’s be clear:
:we are talking about a real date here, not going for coffee in the middle of the day or taking her to your favorite auto parts store because you need a few things. If you take the time and effort to ask a woman out and she takes the time and effort to clear her calendar of everything else important she has to do you are expected to take it seriously. I know she will!

Date Killer Number 1: Not dressing for the occasion.

Many years ago while still in my 20’s I asked many happy older women what they prefer in a man: Good looks or good manners. The happily married ones said good manners. Most of them said that how a man dresses is more important than biological good looks. If you look like Brad Pitt you still can’t show up in dirty torn clothing and be a hit. Let’s go into detail here. A man who cares enough about himself to clean up and at the very least wear clothes that fit and show him off at his best definitely gives the impression that his life is going well and he will be easy to spend time with. Don’t know what looks good on you? Do what we women do. Ask a friend! Let’s face it. You asked her out for many reasons, but a big one is because of what she looks like. She may be thinking the same about you.

What Every Man needs to Know About being Successful With Women - Get The Missing Manual on Dating Women~ and Become a Master at getting a Womans Number!

Date Killer Number 2: Not having anything planned out.

Many of my lady friends have said to me that if a man calls her up day of and says, “I don’t know, what do you want to do” they are put off and almost offended. Think about and do a little research related to what you want to do. What does she like to do? This can be tricky because many women feel it is important that the gentleman make the arrangements for the date but you may not have the opportunity to ask her what she likes in too much detail. My honest suggestion is to choose something that you regularly do or attend that you think a woman would also like. Dinner and a movie may sound overused and boring but the truth is if you do this tried and true combo it provides for the right amount of conversation and opportunity to get to know each other. Let’s break it down to a few details here

1. Have a few things to do planned. If you speak to her and leave it open and she makes a suggestion you are free and clear to do what she wants to do. Just remember that if you choose that route you are required to do what she wants! No backing out.
2. Make arrangements for her transportation unless you hear otherwise from her. In many cities it is both practical and safe to take the bus or train and meet each other. This is okay, but don’t assume that she is fine with that unless she tells you.
3. Plan on a time that works for both of you and stick with it. If you are late, or have to postpone or cancel please do so as soon as you can and politely as possible.
4. This is more a suggestion than a killer. The first 1 or 2 dates I recommend taking her places that are affordable to you and that you would happily do with friends. If you take her to a fabulous and expensive restaurant she may think you can do that all the time, which is fine if you really can do that all the time. If you take her to the Opera because you were told she loves it then plan on going to the Opera often in the future. You see what I’m getting at here. Be yourself.

Date Killer Number 3: Expecting her to pay for the date or generally whining about money.

Whining about not being able to afford things isn’t the best way to start out. Remember you picked the place. If you pick a place that you can’t pay for both of you even once it’s not just about money. It’s about looking irresponsible. Contrary to what everyone says in books and movies women are not only out looking for money. If it were that important to them they wouldn’t be messing around with dating. They would be working overtime and plotting the overthrow of the CEO of the company they work for. I will let you guys in on a little secret that you may not know. Women spend huge amounts of money before a date. They get their nails done. They get their hair cut or at least played with. They may buy new clothes if they think they need to. Sometimes they even try hard to get off work and lose money that way. I don’t imaging you guys do all that. So to ask her to pay on the first few dates is a little presumptuous. Later a nice and generous woman will pay for something, buy something for you or at the very least do something nice to save you money. Just don’t assume she will do that on the first few dates.

What Every Man needs to Know About being Successful With Women - Get The Missing Manual on Dating Women~ and Become a Master at getting a Womans Number!

Date Killer Number 4: Talking about an Ex.

I will admit that when I was 19 years old this was a very important rule of mine. Why is this man sitting in front of me doing nothing but talking about her? Did he really want together with me to complain about the past? After that happened to me one too many times I made it a hard and fast rule that if a man talked about an ex-girlfriend on the first 3 dates he was out. I have since relaxed that rule, but only from a practical point of view. It is alright to tell a woman you have to pick up your kids from your ex-wife, or explain that you still run a business together, etc., but nothing more than that. No memory lane stuff, good or bad. The reason for this should be obvious. Do you want her to do that to you?

Date Killer Number 5: Having too much to drink.

Yes, we live in a society where a nice bottle of wine is expected and almost everyone has their favorite cocktail, but even if your date is a drinker do you think this will put you at your most charming? Some people get more fun with a glass or two of alcohol, but if you end up having to explain yourself later that does not make a good impression which is what you are all about right now. A few months down the road it might be appropriate, but not now. And again, something to think about. Almost every woman I know has told me at least one story where after a date they refused to get into a car with a man because he clearly had too much to drink. I repeat: do you want her to do that to you?

Date Killer Number 6: Making comments that are far too personal or downright inappropriate.

The first few dates you are trying to show yourself in your best light. Making a negative comment about her is simply crossing that line. If she needs to lose weight in your opinion she probably already knows this without you having to tell her. If you don’t like something about her don’t point it out. Simply don’t ask her out again in the future. And ditto with making comments that are positive but still far too personal. If you think she looks great, tell her! Just don’t go into individual body parts and what you would like to do with them. And again, she knows this without you having to tell her.

Date Killer Number 7: Out and Out Lying

Television is full of sitcoms where someone tells a lie to a date and spends weeks unraveling or worse, covering it up. If she can’t accept you don’t go out with her. She’s not worth it. Do not lie for favorable impression or because you feel ashamed of something. You will get caught later and have to explain why you did that. We all know that writers embellish the truth to make it more entertaining, but at a certain point it’s just called fiction. The ancient Hawaiians have a saying: Tell the truth” there is less to remember.

Learn How To Pickup Women And Score!

Learn how to pickup women -Great articles, dating tips and guides on meeting beautiful women!