Yes that is correct, hiding or keeping deadly secrets will kill your man. Everyone who has ever been involved in a relationship with a man knows that men do not discuss their secrets with women nor are they willing to share them with another man. Ladies, your significant other may be keeping deadly secrets that can literally kill your man. As you know getting a man to go to the doctor is like getting him to stop and ask for directions. It’s just NOT going to happen! He’s going to be pig-headed and defiant when it comes to doing either one of these tasks.

As you may know, Oprah has discussed male issues, and has even allowed Dr. Oz to take over her stage; but who knows what percentage of males have actually started going to see the doctor because of those shows. Well this past Monday, Dr. Oz, one of America’s favorite doctors discussed this subject matter again and discussed the 3 biggest secrets that men usually keep to themselves and still do not seek medical help.

Dr. Oz began the show by saying that, “Secrets are the number one thing that tears couples apart and it is one of the main reasons that sends men to the hospitals. The secrets that men keep from women are dangerous and often times they are deadly.” One of his guests, Dr. Jeff Gardere a psychologist that is studying the way men think stated that he believed, “Men keep such deadly secrets because their egos are tied into their health and their performance. So when men become ill they tend to think of themselves as being weaker or less than a man and start keeping these very deadly secrets that they should be talking about.”

I’m sure most can guest what the number one topic is that no one wants to talk about - Erectile Dysfunction (ED). Another guest, Dr. Harry Fisch, an urologist, stated that, “Men equate their virility with the ability to have an erection. The ability to have an erection is very important to men and when there is a problem it is a kick in the amour and they feel bad about themselves; thinking it is a psychological problem when in reality it is a medical problem nearly all of time.”

Estimates range from 15 million to 30 million, depending on the definition used. According to the National Ambulatory Medical Care Survey (NAMCS), for every 1,000 men in the United States, 7.7 physician office visits were made for ED in 1985. By 1999, that rate had nearly tripled to 22.3. Erectile dysfunction or impotence is defined as the inability to attain and/or maintain an erection suitable for intercourse. According to Dr. Oz’s website, ED affects more than half of men over the age 60, and nearly 20 percent of men over the age of 20.

Erectile dysfunction results from medical problems such as high blood pressure, diabetes, obesity and smoking, could be keeping your sex life from being healthy. Causes of erectile dysfunction include diseases affecting blood flow, such as atherosclerosis (hardening of the arteries); nerve disorders, psychological factors such as stress, depression and performance anxiety, or injury to the penis. Some chronic illnesses, certain medications and a condition called Peyronie’s disease (scar tissue in the penis) can be other causes that contribute to ED.

One of the prostate’s functions is to squeeze fluid into the urethra as sperm move through during sexual climax. This fluid helps make up semen, energizes the sperm, and makes the vaginal canal less acidic. However, scientists admit to not knowing all the roles that the prostate may play in a healthy man. The prostate continues to grow throughout a man’s life; however the enlargement doesn’t usually cause problems until late in life. Benign Prostatic Hyperplasia (BPH) rarely causes symptoms prior to the age of 40, but more than half of men in their sixties and as many as 90 percent of men in their seventies and eighties have some symptoms of BPH.

A normal part of getting older is that a man’s prostate (the walnut-shaped gland that helps produce semen which is located under the bladder) begins to thicken, compressing the urethra and making it difficult for urine to pass through. Many symptoms of BPH come from an obstruction of the urethra and gradual loss of bladder function, which results in not completely being able to empty the bladder. One of the most effective means of detecting prostate cancer early is through a screening, which involves a digital rectal exam and measuring the amount of prostate-specific antigen (PSA) in the blood.

This added pressure causes men to go to the bathroom frequently, however it takes a long time to actually urinate or finish; only to wind up to feeling like they have to go again. Even Dr. Oz was surprised at the number of men in his audience that admitted to carrying bottles around in their cars just in case that urge happens while traveling a far. One guy admitted that he was very embarrassed by this problem and felt like his wife would see him as less than a man.

Everyone will begin to forget things as we grow older and begin to suffer from memory loss in old age, however, men are less likely own up to this issue. Often men are afraid to speak up because it is confirmation of aging and can be scary to contemplate. Men according to Dr. Oz, memory loss can be a symptom of another underlying cause as well. Prostate cancer, cholesterol, epilepsy, dementia, early Alzheimer’s disease, aging and injuries to the brain may contribute to the loss of one’s memory. There were several articles on the website Wellsphere that seem to discuss that possible causes are decreases in testosterone and andropause, which is a male’s equivalent of a woman’s menopause

According to EmaxHealth, a study by the Mayo Clinic in Rochester Minnesota examined 2050 people from the ages of 70 to 89 and found that 15% of the participants had mild cognitive decline. Men were found to be 1.67 times more likely to have both memory and thinking skills to decline earlier than women. One article in Men’sHealth titled Think Faster, Remember More provides 10 secrets to better brain use, which discusses the affects of alcohol on the brain and how testosterone may help you remember. .

There appears to be small studies being conducted however, I could not find a centrally located website that provided concrete information as to the cause of memory loss in men. The male that felt he was having memory loss on Dr. Oz’s show at times would argue with his wife that he had told her to do something when he actually never had told her. His wife said that it begin to happen so often that she begin thinking that she was having a memory loss problem. Women, Dr. Oz and his guest speakers all agreed that women should stop blaming themselves when they suspect their men are sick.

Dr. Oz told the men that were on the show that they really needed to start talking about medical issues because, “Women being the maternal ones begin to take the blame feeling that it is their faults that the men are having problems.” If a man is suffering from ED, his mate can easily start believing that she is not good enough, pretty enough, or he simply does not desire to be with her any more. Such thought can ruin a woman’s self-image and self-esteem which in turn will make it even more difficult for a couple to have a normal sex life.

This was a very interesting show because a few brave men were willing to show just how vulnerable most men are when it comes to something being wrong with their bodies. Numerous times throughout the show men stated that they haven’t went to the doctor because they are afraid of the outcome, or even afraid of what the solution may require.

Women, Dr. Oz and his guest doctors all agreed that it is important for you to show your love when your man is having health issues. The experts believe you can show love and support by getting things out in the open, by beginning the conversation, by explaining that you love your partner, and want them to take care of themselves because you do not want to live without them.

Make sure that you pick the right place and time to address health issues. Ladies, please, please:

• Do not attempt to have a discussion about ED in the bedroom this creates too much vulnerability and discomfort on the both of you.
  
• Do not attempt to discuss such a sensitive topic without first explaining that you love him for himself and not his physical performance.
  
• Do not bring this up in front of other family members or his buddies.
  
• And do not attempt to discuss memory loss right after he has forgotten something.

Part of a couple’s intimacy is to be able to talk about anything and to be supportive of each other. If you and your man have never experienced this type of intimacy it may be scary at first, however, it is important to get things out in the open so that you can live the best life together as possible. Women, it is important to remember to be firm, but don’t become a nag. To be supportive without yelling, arguing, and crying. It is important to remain calm, kind, and resourceful in getting your man to open up with you.

It is important to start and end your sentences with “I love you.” Discuss such sensitive matters on neutral grounds. Listen to his concerns and remain supportive. Ask if you can make a plan together, and that the first step should be to visit a doctor to check for underlying health problems and get it treated.

Men keeping deadly secrets will kill your man (Peter, Dick, Joe, Buddy, Big Man, or whatever you’ve named your penis). So please, please:

• Do attempt to have a discussion about your manly secrets that may be keeping you from being that brawny guy with the eagerness of your past. If not with your loved one at least with a doctor after getting a thorough check-up.
• Know that discussing such sensitive topics is not a reflection on your manhood. However hiding it and not discussing it is a reflection that might be killing you.
• “Pretending” will not miraculously make it go away and chances are the only person you are fooling is perhaps yourself.
• And remember that “Cool Men Wear Gowns!”

There are numerous remedies that can assist you with whatever ailment that maybe troubling you. However, most ailments cannot heal without some medical assistance. So, it is important to seek help to save yourself in order to be around for your loved ones, and help your “man” fulfill those sexual fantasies…