QUESTION: What do you do when your best friends decide to leave you, all alone, in the most boring town on the planet, while they jet of to bloody Land of Big Brick Walls (aka. China)?

ANSWER: Very little.

Atleast, that's what I'd usually say. Except that I don't want to do very little. I want to do something very big... I don't know why. Maybe it's to kind of prove that fun stuff can happen to a person who is Beyond the Valley of Boredom (totes stole that form Angus, Thongs, and Perfect Snogging), because she lives in a town that is so boring it should not be called a town. It should't even be called a ditch... it's like a ditch multiplied by 10000000000.......0000000000000000000000......00000infinity0000...000.

I mean, on the surface this town is nice. It has the beach, and sunshine, and a fairly nice quiet main street, and all the lawns are green and the hedges are kept neat and tidy, and it is generally orderly and pretty. But then you stay for longer that that weekend camping trip, and you start to see that the population consists of retirees and bogan children, who find throwing rocks at cars exciting. You start to see that it actually rains more than it doesn't and that the ocean goes weird and brown in stormy weather (95% of the time). After a while, you start to see that even good friends, hot surfers, and Grease rehearsals (CHARLIE!!) can't save you from being bored in a ditchy, holey town like this one. And why aren't there any footpaths??? I DONT UNDERSTAND.

So anyway, I want to do something big while they are away. I want them to come back and say "Wow! The Great Wall of China was cool, but compared to what Jess has been doing here, it was, like, tres dull!" I want to do something radical, crazy, unexpected, impressive!

Hmm... I already got all my hair chopped off....

I'll get back to you when I think of something.

For now though,

Tata!

Love J.P