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Diaper Discipline, What it is, and why it's dangerous to use on children

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By Stanley_19802


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Hello Readers,

I have to appoligize, the below article is going to sound a bit off. Because of rules and regulations from Hubpages, google and other companies that are part of this site, I had to make a few alterations. I did have people I had planned on naming, and sites I wanted to mention by name. However, because it is also against Google AdSense's terms of use to publish content related to "advocacy against an individual, group, or organization" I can't name the person I am talking about or the web site(s) I am talking about. So please bare with me and excuse the odd feeling of the article. I tried to write it the best I could without naming any person or web site. If there is any mention of a person or website that I missed, please let me know. If this article interests you and wish to talk more in debth about the topic or have questions, feel free to e-mail me at Stanley_19802@yahoo.com and we can talk more. If you want to do your own research, simply typing "Diaper Discipline" on just about any search engine will give you results. You would be looking for the sites or communites mostly. I found for me, most of the more meaningful sites were on the first and second page. The more pages you go back, you end up with things like people asking questions about diaper discipline, not so much information. Aside from that, below is the article on the topic of Diaper Discipline. What it is, and why it's dangerous to use on children. Have a great day!

-Stanley

Diaper Discipline - What is it, and what has to be done to get it?

      Diaper discipline, also called diaper punishment or "DD", is a type of psychological punishment that involves shaming and humiliating a child/teen (typically used on children between the ages of 2-18. But rarely it is sometimes used on children younger then 2 and older than 18.) by forcing them to wear diapers like a baby. Diaper discipline is administered by the child’s parent(s) to manage the rebellious behavior of children and teenagers.

      It is similar to diaper domination used on adults, a form of BDSM play rather than legitimate punishment. Many AB (adult baby) or DL (Diaper lover) sites have countless stories regarding being forced to wear a diaper and otherwise be treated as if they were a baby for such things as their parents find out they wet their bed, crying "like a baby" and so. Treating the submissive as baby with the idea of "If your going to act like a baby, I am going to treat you like one". It is sometimes difficult to distinguish AB/DL fiction from the actual real life use of diapers and/or baby items as a punishment. Diapering is an effective punishment for many reasons; the shame and embarrassment of being dressed as a baby, physical discomfort from the diapers' bulk and heat, and the psychological ramifications of being forced to wet and soil oneself.

      The discipline can be carried out in a variety of ways and can be either a short-term punishment or an ongoing arrangement to deter future misbehavior. In most cases the child is kept in diapers day and night (24/7) and is required to use the diaper for their intended purpose rather than a toilet (which is often locked during the punishment); leaving the child/teen no choice but to wet or mess the diaper. This in turn leads to questions regarding how and when the child/teen should have their diapers changed.

      Some parents use a fixed set of times for changes (for example: the child is changed after breakfast, after lunch time, after dinner and right before bed). Other parents prefer to check the diaper once or twice an hour and just change it when the parent feels it has been used enough. However, many go with the stipulation that if the child asks for a change, that the diaper change should be postponed for an hour each time they ask sending the message that it’s up to the parents to choose when the diaper is to be changed and not the child. That the parents are in charge. Diapering is an obscure and controversial form of discipline which some describe as a form of abuse that hinders a child's development. Others believe it to be a preferable alternative to corporal punishment, with an online community promoting the concept.

      Diaper discipline is carried out for various reasons and in a variety of ways. Often, it is simply a retaliation to immature behavior with the mind set being that "if you're going to act like a baby, then you'll be treated like a baby", One person on the board is now 19 years old. Her parents put her in DD and regressed her to that of a toddler, all because she didn't get a job after high school. Her parents admit that they did it because they didn't want her to grow up. Many parents on the site deliberately expose their kids to family members and friends while only in diapers and a t-shirt, and even change them in front of visitors. It's vey embarrassing, any adult that's been seen nakid can confirm that. It's not any easier for a child/teen. I have heard parents say they use restraints (similar to those used in mental hospitals) to keep the kid on the changing table and prevent them from fighting. And to restrain them into the crib for the night so they can't get out of the crib. Or spank them until they agree to go along with it. And I have heard of a few parents taking pictures of their child/teen in diapers or in a crib and threaten to expose it at school or online to get the child to go along with the punishment with the least resistance possible.

      There was even 2 posts I came across on another site a long time ago. Parents poured bleach into the child's diaper and applied locking plastic pants to prevent removal of the diaper as part of the diaper discipline. So far I have only come across 2 people who have done this to them. They say it's to make the diapers uncomfortable or to give the kid diaper rash faster. The parents said they did it to make the punishment more effective, and make the kid think twice before breaking the rules again. I have to admit, if I had bleach in my diaper (I am incontinent so I know where these kids are coming from to a point), I would want to kill myself before I let that happen again. The bleach diapers are abuse of the worst kind I have come across. In other cases the reasoning behind the DD punishment is more complicated.

      There is a major message board out there that is a online community of parents (and some children currently being punished with diaper discipline) who encourage each other on the use of diapers and/or baby items (crib, baby bottles, play pen, high chair and so on) as a punishment for their children. "A pro-DD site" I was told. The message board provides several guidelines detailing how and why they believe the punishment should be administered.

      Many discussions are about such things as how long the punishment should last, how to keep the children from removing the diapers, how to make the punishment worse if a child is resisting or breaking more house rules, and several of the parents post with weekly updates, or force their children to post updates about what the child did to get the punishment, how their current punishment is progressing and how the child is acting during the punishment (depressed, crying, hitting, resisting, and so on).

      One Diaper Disciplin's sites owner comments on how diaper discipline should be done, saying to the parents who are new to DD: “First when you finally decide to use diapers you can not back down. You must be consistent and unwavering. Diapers go on, no ifs, ands, or buts. Diapers should be worn immediately after school. No pants are to be worn in the house. The child may not cover their diapers up at home. Out in public they need to have pants on but the bathroom is still off limits. Diapers must be used for intended purpose. I recommend once diaper discipline starts, pull ups be worn to school, and their regular underpants be removed from their room or put in the trash. When they come home from school, they trade in those pull ups for regular diapers. Of course on weekends they are to stay diapered. Pretty much once in diapers they have no rights or privileges. What you want to do once diapers are on is up to you. You can be super strict or let them live their life but in diapers. Still recommend spanking bare bottom when needed”

      When it comes to diaper changes, only the parents, another family member or family friend can change the child’s diaper. Rarely a sibling is permitted to change the diaper of a child in diaper discipline. It’s mainly kept as a job for adults. Some families have a strict rule that children in DD cannot ask for a diaper change. They have to quietly wait for a parent to come and check them and it’s up to the parent to decide if the child needs a diaper change or not. If the child does ask for a diaper change, typically he or she is punished for asking for a change by having to sit in the wet/messy diaper for an additional hour. Parents who have this rule claim it’s to send the message that the PARENTS are in charge, not the child. And it makes the child further depend on the parent(s), which seems to be a common desire of the parents on the diaper discipline site.

      Sometimes the families just don’t care who sees or knows about the diaper discipline. The parents don’t care who see’s the child in a diaper, and in fact think being seen in the diaper will be a deterrent to breaking the rules or resisting the punishment again in the future. To maximize the shame and embarrassment of the punishment some parents choose to change a wet or dirty diaper in front of company. Some parents invite other family or friends over for the sole purpose of seeing the child in the diapers and causing more shame and embarrassment. If the family goes and visits their aunt and uncle and cousins for example, some parents make the child drop their pants and expose the diaper and tell the family member(s) why they are in diapers. At that point the pants are taken away and the child is told to go play in the diaper and T-shirt as if they were at home. Not all do this, but a few do. And rarely, if one of the child’s friends come over the parents will let them in and then have the child tell the friend why he/she is in diapers before they can go play (while in just a diaper and T-shirt only).

      The site, and others like it, which is not connected to diaper fetishism and will ban AB/DL's from it’s community, claims their goal is to discourage youths from misbehaving by offering them protection from the world in the form of diapers. The owner of one site feels, "Too much rebellion is defensive, and that diapers can provide substitute protection which will curb this behavior" in a manner preferable to corporal punishment. However, they also highlight the controversy of using diapers, and clarify that it will not always work for every family.

      The first question parents ask is what the child has to do to deserve being diapered; the site's answer is continued behavioral problems (most common issues are: low grades in school (typically they are diapered for low grades until their grades come up), bed wetting, talking back, throwing tantrums, fighting either at home or at school, getting suspended from school (kids suspended from school typically are in diapers and/or treated like a baby for the length of the suspension), teasing a sibling being punished with diapers (the child teasing the other in diapers finds themselves also in DD), and the list goes on).

      One parent on one of the diaper discipline sites posted saying that they make sure while their son is inside the house, that he only wears diapers and a t-shirt. Saying that the whole point of DD for them is to make sure that their son understands and is made somewhat uncomfortable. But says he wears pants or shorts over the diaper while in public.

      Another parent one of the diaper discipline sites posted saying their son is not allowed to wear pants or shorts in the house while in diaper discipline. Saying it makes it easier for him to see if his son has removed the diapers. He also says it makes it easier to check and change his son. While outside he wears disposable diapers with pants or shorts over them, and is sent to school in pull-ups.

      Another quote from the owner of one of the diaper discipline boards, the board’s owner tells parents to remember when using DD on the child, that they know why they are being diaper disciplined and understand that they will be in DD until their behavior changes. He also adds that it's important to make sure that it's not pleasant to be changes so the child will not have many accidents in the diaper. Many of the parents make the diaper changes uncomfortable for the child by doing it gruff and fast, changed in front of the child’s friends or family or not using powder in the diaper or choosing not to use any other rash protection methods. Most parents add a week to the length of the child’s diaper discipline if the child argues, fights or complains about being changed, or resists having their diapers changed or checked.

      One parent from one of the diaper discipline sites says that they change their son when THEY decide it needs to be done and that the child has to submit to being changed without any complaints. Adding that the child has no control over their diapers and the rules are set up to make the child feel that. Because of the diaper changes are being made as uncomfortable as possible, the children sometimes try to hold the urine and bowel movements as long as possible as to try to keep from having to be in a messy/wet diaper or to avoid being changed as long as possible. The retention of urine can cause liver damage, kidney damage, UTI’s (Urinary Tract Infection), or bladder damage which can cause loss of bladder control. Holding back BM’s can cause constipation, impaction, a bowel obstruction which requires surgery to correct. Not all parents make the diaper changes uncomfortable, but some do.

      I came across one post that just made me cry. A parent of a 8 year old and a 6 year old. According to the poster, they have been in diaper discipline since December of 2008, and are going to remain in diapers until they leave the home and get their own place. These children are some of the ones I think about often. Who are treated so harshly. The poster described how the two are in diapers for the rest of their childhood. That the 6 year old is diapered the second she comes home and is only out of diapers during school. The 6 year old is made to wear Pampers baby diapers since she is still small enough to fit. The 8 year old is diapered all the time as well except for school and sports. The poster was describing that one evening the parents came home to find the 6 year old still up at 11:30pm and had refused to put on the diaper. Because she wasn't in bed, and wasn't diapered she was hit 3 times with a leather strap and was diapered and put to bed.

      The poster also said the parents ordered velcro wrist and leg restraints for the kids. The 6 year old has them put in place on the crib the 6 year old is made to sleep in, and the 8 year old has the restraints put on her bed. If the children resist being put in diapers or take the diapers off, they are put in restraints. If they keep getting out of bed/crib without permission, they are put in restraints. It made me cry when I read that post. The poster who takes care of the children says it will be nice to have the restraints when the children are with her for when they refuse to be diapered. It's so sad to hear what the parents do to their children. And to say "it's for their own good". How is being restrained to your bed and forcefully diapered against your will "for your own good"? Or made to sleep in a crib, and restrained to the crib if you don't stay in it "for your own good"? 

      Some parents use baby powder with a strong babyish scent such as Johnson's and Johnson's “to make him smell like a baby”. Often times baby diapers are used because of the babyish print on them. If the child is too big, there is/was a topic on the message board with detailed instructions on how to tape two diapers are end to end to make them fit the body of a older child. Baby diapers are used as much as possible if the child is small enough instead of youth or adult diapers, in part because baby diapers have the baby theme designs on the front tape panel where as cloth diapers and youth and adult diapers do not have infantile tape panels. This was because the baby diapers help enforce the feelings of shame and embarrassment for “acting like a baby” as well as make them feel and look as such.

Picture that shows what two baby diapers tapped end to end would look like. (and no that's not me. I wish I was that skinny...lol)
Picture that shows what two baby diapers tapped end to end would look like. (and no that's not me. I wish I was that skinny...lol)

     There are some parents who feel that cloth diapers are the best way to go. Mostly because you are limited with disposables on how thick you can make them, and once your child is too big for even altered baby disposable diapers, cloth diapers are the only choice to use infantile designs with. Cloth diapers also make you feel wetter because they do not have the liner or gel cores that disposables have to make you feel dryer. There are many plastic pants with very infantile designs printed on them. With cloth diapers you can double them up for added bulk between the legs, and thick diapers are easily seen through pants and shorts. Adding doublers adds to the thickness and can extend the times between changes (heard being used for children only being changed 4 times a day).

     Parents who use cloth diapers use babyish diaper pins and infantile patterns on the plastic pants to make the diapering experience as embarrassing, shameful and uncomfortable as possible. Those who use cloth diapers for diaper discipline use them because there is more involved during a diaper change such as pinning of the diapers and pulling up of the plastic pants and of course the look and feel that is unique only to cloth diapers. Some parents who use cloth diapers for diaper discipline also include having the child wash their wet/messy diapers they used as part of the punishment. Those children who are unlucky enough to have a clothes line in the back yard often find themselves in the back yard hanging their diapers on the line to dry to add additional shame and embarrassment to the punishment. How public the exposure is, or being put in a position (having to grab the mail, or take the trash out to the bin in the driveway) of possibly being seen seems to depend on the nature of the offence or how much resisting they are giving to the punishment.

     Why don’t children just resist the discipline or just not go along with it at all? Ones who resist having the diaper put on or refuse to take a bottle the parents give them, or who refuse to get into the crib are either spanked till they submit, are held down and diapered, tied to a bed and diapered or restrained into the crib. Or in extreme cases, drugged with sleeping medication or other sedative medication and then diapered once they fall asleep or a combination of the above.

     Some parents have even taken pictures of their children in their diapered state and threaten to show it off to friends or post it online to force the child to go along with the punishment with the least resistance and to prevent future acts of resisting. Or some parents will take the child outside in just a diaper and T-shirt in the yard or other place where there is a chance to be seen as a punishment for resisting, although being taken out in public in a diaper and T-shirt anywhere is extremely rare. Parents often prefer to just have the child wear a short T-shirt that rides up a bit to expose the diaper if they bend over or reach for something. Or diaper them thickly so it’s noticeable through the pants so as to not bring any unwanted attention. Just enough to make people look at the child, but not enough for someone to step in and say something. How bad the punishment and the amount of exposure seems to depend largely on the severity of the offence.

     Why not just take the diaper off once the parents leave the room? Kids who try, or have taken the diaper off just make the situation worse. Parents will add duck tape over the tabs to prevent the removal of the diaper or add it anyway to be able to tell if the child has tried to remove the diaper. There are also plastic pants some parents order online that has a small chain or cable sewn into the waist band and a pad lock to prevent tampering or the removal of the diapers completely. There are locking diaper pins too, however they are difficult to find or locate a site that sells them. The plastic pants however are much easier to find, mostly on BDSM sites, sometimes on some AB/DL (Adult Baby/Diaper Lover) sites and a few on select cloth diaper sites.

     Some kids who resist or rebel find themselves tied to their bed or some parents order leather wrist and leg restraints online, similar to those used in mental hospitals and restrain the child to the bed or crib if a crib is used. Others skip the restraints and just spank them multiple times until they are bawling and submit to the parents request for a diaper change, or to get into the crib. For those who choose the restraints, the children/teens are tied/restrained to the changing table. Typically if the child/teen is tied/restrained, it's done until the child agrees to submit to the punishment or until the parent believe that the child has learned not to attempt to remove the diaper or resist any other part of the punishment. Not all the parents restrain their child, but it is done. Below is a picture of the locking plastic pants found on a cloth diaper site that one diaper discipline site owner has recommended to parents (http://www.plastic-pants.com/big/lockpants.htm). There is a link as well to the site who sells these locking plastic pants on one of the diaper discipline boards.

Pair of infantile plastic pants with a cable or chain sewen into the waist band with a small pad lock to prevent the removal of the diaper.
Pair of infantile plastic pants with a cable or chain sewen into the waist band with a small pad lock to prevent the removal of the diaper.

     The owner of one of the diaper discipline sites feels that the discipline should be administered before the child becomes out of control, before they have even done anything. Parents are encouraged to start this punishment over summer vacation as this way the children can "get used to how the DD works faster" without getting time with the diapers removed. And for the ones getting the full baby treatment, they have no hope of going to school and getting a break from the constant baby treatment. Parents seem to like this because they can keep a constant eye on the diapered child and prevent them from “cheating”. Many parents also sit in the bathroom during baths or showers to prevent the child from using the toilet during shower time or otherwise "cheat". In some cases the parents insist on giving the child/teen their bath for them, Washing them as if they were a baby and unable to do it themselves.

     The diaper discipline site claims that the initial reactions such as "Crying, Anger or Depression" are to be expected as the child adjusts to being back in diapers. Saying that they should come to accept being in diapers and/or being treated like a baby in time as they realize it is for their own good. What they don't say is there are countless side effects that children have with DD. They can range from Depression, Anger, Resentment, Multiple Personality Disorder (MPD), Dissociative Disorder, Self Injury (AKA: SI, Self Harm, self-mutilation), Suicide and other mental conditions that stem from the abuse. A few of the children this is done to became TB (Teen Baby) or DL (Diaper Lover) as a way to cope with what happened or is still happening to them. A way of turning something negative, into something positive to be able to deal with it. The mind has many tricks for surviving trama.

     I recall some time ago, I came across a story in the news paper about a child being punished with diaper discipline. He was about 8 year old and had been wetting his bed. The parents, upset that he couldn't stay dry decided to start punishing him for it. He was diapered and put in the play pen on the front portch in just a diaper and T-shirt and a stuffed animal and a baby bottle was put in the play pen with him. At some point, friends of the child's passed by and saw him in the play pen and diapers. He was teased a bit, but when he got to school the next day, all the children knew about him being diapered in a play pen and teased him. Later that day on the way home, he jumped off a freeway overpass and died. It was just too much for him to take. I want to prevent anymore children from choosing death to make abuse like this stop.

     Diaper discipline can be a short-term or long-term arrangement. Some children are diapered for only a Weekend, others for a few weeks at a time, and other parents choose to keep their child/children in diapers on a more permanent basis (typically till the child is 18 and/or moves out). When children are finished with thier particular session of diaper discipline, one site’s owner suggests that parents keep a stack of diapers on the child’s dresser to be a constant reminder of what will happen if they break the rules again. Diaper Discipline Site describes it as ongoing, with most adolescents being re-potty trained and transitioned out of diapers after they finish high school.

     One site also recommends that diapers are worn at all times and used for thier intended purpose (no use of the toilet at all), but suggest the use of pull-ups during school hours to allow the child some discretion amongst peers and to keep a low profile at school. Most families won’t take the risk of anyone finding out about the “Family Secret”. Or being caught and turned into the police or children's and family services. So the parents institute a hush hush about the punishment. They make a rule that the child/children must never tell anyone outside the home (Friends, teacher, school therapist and so on) about the diaper punishment (AKA “The family secret”) or face a very harsh punishment.

     For example, one parent on one of the diaper discipline board wrote about her family saying they keep diaper discipline within the family except for family and close friends. She says she recently started a rule that if anyone tells a outsider who doesn't know about the diaper discipline, it automatically gets the child 3 month in diapers 24/7. The rule applies if they tell someone about the other child's diaper discipline. She says only one of her children have broken the rule by "blabbin" to one of her friends and it got the child 3 months in diapers 24/7. So far, no more of the children have told anyone else about the punishment. However, if they do tell anyone again, the second offence she says earns the child double the time (6 months in diapers 24/7).

     As you can see, the “family secret” is heavily guarded. Once the friend who found out leaves, the child gets it worse and for longer. Imagine having to wear diapers, then because you told someone, now you have to lose your bed and now have to sleep in a crib. Have your cup replaced with a baby bottle. Be forced to wear a sleeper or onsie because you told someone about your punishment, or your brother/sister’s punishment. The kids are afraid, ashamed and embarrassed to tell anyone about being made to wear diapers, having to use a baby bottle, sleeping in a crib….or worse, making the punishment worse by telling anyone. And what an awful thing to see, a child afraid of their parents. It’s not right. Children are supposed to feel safe and loved at home. Not dread coming home everyday knowing what they will have to deal with.

     Most children just deal with it until they can move out and away from it. For several, that’s the only way it will stop as several parents have decided to make their children wear diapers and get the baby treatment until the children leave the homeas an attempt to prevent any further bad or unwanted behavior until the child leaves the home. And the emotions kids feel during this “punishment” or “lifestyle”. Depression, hopelessness, feeling like they are not loved, the damage to their self image, thoughts of suicide for the severe ones, anger over being teased at school for those going to school in diapers, and the list goes on.

     There was a time several years ago when I was about 16. I had been bed wetting for a few years already and been wearing diapers secretly to manage it as I was afraid I would be punished for my bed wetting like my brother. Diapers were my choice, they were not forced on me or punished with them and I still had a hard time wearing one. My aunt however did use them as a punishment. She made my brother go to the store and pick out plastic pants and then stand in line and pay for them. Then after dinner he had to go and put them on, and show my aunt before he went to bed to make sure he had them on. Obviously since there was nothing inside to absorb the urine it leaked. It went on for the 2 weeks we were visiting.

     Then on a visit to our grandparents, he had wet the bed and my grandma went to a neighbor’s house and got a diaper. She told him that if he wet the bed again should would diaper him, and then left it on the coffee table for him to look at all day. That night she made him sleep in the bath tub. So after seeing that I was terrified to tell my parents about my wetting for fear of similar treatment.

     Anyway, I had a friend over and he discovered my diapers. I told him why I wore them and he swore he would not tell anyone. The next day I got to school to find he had told several people that I not only wet the bed, but wore diapers as well. I got called several names and comments such as “baby”, “are you wearing a diaper right now?”, “bed wetting baby” and of course the “ha ha, you wear diapers” taunt. And I only wore at night. Imagine what these kids have to deal with having to go to school diapered. Not because they have a wetting problem, but because they got low grades on a report card, or because they got home too late, or talked back.

     School is hard enough without adding the stress of a high profile thing as wearing diapers to be teased about everyday. I say high profile because in many kids minds, diapers are for babies, and only babies wear them. And most kids, especially the younger kids have a horrible habit of saying exactly what they are thinking and those things are normally very hurtful. School is stressful enough without the shame and embarrassment of being diaper disciplined at home, and then sent to school diapered.

     Punished, and sent to school in diapers too? Wouldn’t someone notice? One would think. But the parents on the diaper discipline site post the excuse they used so their child can be diapered at school and a few are even being changed by the nurse. They don’t even get to use the bathroom at school. It’s true that there are children who truly do need diapers due to a medical condition or mental retardation for example, and there is nothing wrong with wearing protection because you need it.

     It's quite another to be forced to wear a diaper when you have no bladder or bowel control problem. I am not a parent, nor did I need to wear diapers at school myself. But I would think that to have a student in diapers, or to even have the nurse change a student's diaper there should have to be a letter from the doctor explaining the illness that requires the child to need to wear diapers at school and/or have that diaper be changed by a nurse.

     One of the parents on the board used the excuse saying her son needed to wear diapers for an "emotional problem". And had the extra diapers in the nurses office for when he needed a change at school. Another parent uses that her child has frequent bladder infections. And another parent uses the excuse that her child is having frequent wetting accidents and that's why he is being sent to school in diapers.

     Ask for notes from doctors saying what’s going on and that diapers are required and for how long. Look for those red flags. Kids can’t stand up for themselves or protect themselves. That’s what adults are for and supposed to do. And I know of no "emotional problems" that cause the loss of bladder/bowel control. Kids with ADD/ADHD have been known to have wetting accidents that’s true.

     But aside from that, what possible emotional problem could possibly cause the loss of bladder and/or bowel control in a child that was coming to school say, last week with no bladder problems? And wouldn’t it seem strange to anyone that one week the kid is fine, the next week he’s coming to school in diapers, and then next week no diapers, then diapers again. Doesn’t that raise any red flags at all? Come on people, ask questions, Get involved. These kids need someone to speak up for them.

     When the question was aked if diaper discipline might be against the law, the owner of one of the boards said to the parents that are punishing their children with diapers that it is not abuse, and not against the law. First off, if that was true, why worry about anyone else finding out? And also, if this punishment was ok and such a success why doesn’t every parent use it? Or way doesn't child services teach it in their parenting classes if it produces such great results? Clearly there is something wrong with doing this to a child….or anyone for that matter.

     I contacted a branch of children's and family services (DCS, CPS, DCFS...whatever it is where you live). I described in much details to them about how a typical diaper discipline “session” is done. About the rules of locking the bathroom door and making the child wear diapers and making them use the diapers. About making them sleep in a baby crib, eat in a high chair, drink all liquids from a bottle and so on.

     Sending them to school in diapers when they have no bladder/bowel control problem. I asked if it was against the law or not. What I was told is that although there isn’t a specific law that covers diaper discipline, there are two laws it would fall under should someone be found doing it and charged with it. Those two laws are:

PC 11165.3: As used in this article, “The willful harming or injuring of a child or the endangering of the person or health of a child” means a situation in which any person willfully causes or permits any child to suffer, or inflicts thereon, unjustifiable physical pain or mental suffering, or having the care or custody of any child, willfully causes or permits the person or health of the child to be placed in a situation in which his or her person or health is endangered.

PC 11165.4: As used in this article, “Unlawful corporal punishment or injury” means a situation where any person willfully inflicts upon any child any cruel or inhuman corporal punishment or injury resulting in a traumatic condition.

     Should a parent be found doing DD and child services get’s a report about possible child abuse the child or children could be removed from the parent’s custody in addition to criminal charges being pressed bases on the level of abuse.

     Some kids don't have to wear to school, however, they must give up their pants/shorts when they return home from school and must be returned to diapers immediately after school and remain diapered all day on weekends and holidays. Parents are told if the punishment is ongoing, all of the child's normal underwear should be taken from them and thrown away or even cut up and disposed of to "help them accept their diapers".

     The site explains that, while pants and shorts need to be worn in public, diapers should be kept in plain sight at home (typically the child is only in the diaper and a T-shirt when at home); the child may not cover them with other clothes. They cannot cover the diaper with blankets or anything else. When in bed unless it’s cold they are put to bed in only the diaper and/or T-shirt, no blankets. This is done to maximize the shame and embarrassment of being in a diaper by not being able to hide the diapers from sight. Having them exposed, keeps them in mind constantly, you can't forget your in diapers.

     When the pants/shorts are not in use, they are locked up. Minor public exposure can be inflicted through household chores such as retrieving the mail or hanging out the laundry. Some parents choose to elaborate on diaper discipline by administering full baby treatment with pacifiers, cribs, playpens, onsies and sleepers in their size (some parents who use baby clothes in their child's size order sleepers with the zipper in the back to prevent the child from removing the article of clothing), baby bottles for all liquids, and rarely they make the child drink baby formula and eat baby food, although this is not always the case.

     Some parents make the punishment worse by dressing their children in shorts and a short T-shirt so when they bend over to pick something up or are forced to hold their parents hand, the shirt rides up and exposes the diaper. Some parents pick out all their childrens school clothing each day that they will wear out as if they are a baby and are incapable of picking out clothing or dressing themselves.

     One member, a parent of 3 children made a post about how he performs the punishment along with the rules of his household. His oldest is 15 years old and he says he will be in “DD” until he graduates from high school.

Normal DD Rules

1)Cloth diapers only at home; never disposable (No pants at home)
2)Disposable diapers out of the house
3)UnderJams under a pair of colored briefs to school; the potty may be used at school. School is the only place Matt may use the potty
4)Diaper checks occur every hour on the hour, no exceptions. Diapers are checked by me looking down the back for poop and putting a finger down the front for pee. If we are out, Matt must put his pants around his ankles for diaper checks. He can ask for neither a check nor a change.
5)Changes occur at my discretion only. At home they occur on the changing table in his room or in the living room. Out of the house they occur in the men's room on the floor or in the car
6)Bedtime is 9:00 p.m. On weekends it may be extended to 10:30pm provided good behavior and a nap of at least 45 minutes.
10)He must start getting ready for bed an hour before, in other words 8:00 p.m. His last diaper check/change occurs then; afterwards he must wait until morning (even on weekends). He must bathe before bed. He may sleep only in a diaper. He must have his teddy bear, pacifier, and bottle with him in bed. He must have his daily "us" time before bed. During this time he must drink the whole bottle I give him.
11)During swimming time (we go every Saturday) He is to wear a swim diaper
12)All homework must be completed before bed
13)Standard decency and etiquette rules must be followed. Failure to abide will result in a spanking and a loss of privileges and stricter rules

Stricter DD Rules
1)I choose what clothing he wears
2)I feed him his breakfast and dinner (lunch on weekends)
3)Outside of school he may only drink from a bottle
4)I give him a bath (instead of allowing him to take it with his little brothers and then inspecting them)
5)Bedtime is 7:00pm
6)He must have a pacifier in his mouth at all times at home in which he is not eating
7)Homework is to be done at the kitchen table starting as soon as he gets out of school”

     Another parent of a 16 year old posted and said when she found her daughter having intercourse at 16. She put her daughter into diapers for that. She says she is now 19 and will be treated like a baby until she moves out. She is also made to use a pacifier, drink from a bottle, and sleep in a crib. Since being placed back in diapers, her mom says the child has not looked at another boy since being put into diaper discipline.

     One child commented about his punishment saying whenever he mouths off/talks back he is punished by having to wear and use a pacifier. He says it makes the punishment worse because not only does he have to be dressed like a toddler and put in diapers, but he also has to have the pacifier in his mouth at all times during the punishment.

   Diaper Discipline being used on children has been around for many, many years. It was often used on children who wet the bed by parents who felt their child was "acting like a baby" by wetting the bed, or felt their child was just being lazy and not going to the bathroom. Or was doing it for attention or to get back at them for something the parents did.

     Back then, and even now in some places, the thought of parents is that children wet the bed because they are lazy or to get back at a parent or even to get attention. Parents who had their child checked out at the doctor and the doctor cannot find a cause, some parents take that as proof that their child is doing it on purpose or for attention.

     The parents who diaper the child as punishment for bed wetting would put the child in a diaper normally after dinner or after their evening bath. They would have their child stay in the diaper until after breakfast the next morning. Or the child would have to wear diapers during the day and at night (24/7) until the child could produce a dry bed/diaper 7 nights in a row. The parents response when the child asks why diapers is that since they are wetting the bed like a baby, they will be treated like a baby.

     For the children in diapers day and night, the child would have to let the parent know they had to go. The child’s diaper would be removed so they could use the bathroom and then it would be put back on with exception to overnight where they would be expected the hold it till morning. Diaper Discipline is not like having a bed wetting child wear a diaper to keep the bedding dry and to give the child a better night’s sleep. Clearly the above is to give the message that the child is acting like a baby and should be treated as a baby by wearing a diaper.

     Because bed wetting can last several years, and sometimes into adulthood the child has no way to stop it other than staying up all night or moving out and away from the abuser. And it has been proven that stress can make it worse. Such as the stress that comes from the threat of being spanked in the morning if they wet. Or yelling at the child. The stress can increase the length of time the child would have stopped wetting, and make it go on for months to years longer than it has to.

     Using DD for bed wetting is just setting the child up to fail. The child knows they will wet the bed if they fall asleep, and it causes unneeded stress knowing in the morning they will either be spanked for the wetting, diapered or both.

     Diaper Discipline first became popular in the S&M/BDSM community as a way to dominate or humiliate the person (or Sub) they are punishing. People in this group also enjoy being whipped, spanked, and diapered with the intent to embarrass or shame the person. Typically people engage in this activity as a way to give up responsibility for those in a commanding profession, or to be punished for things they have done since the last “session” or just for fun.

     However over the years, using diapers to punish someone started to be used on those who didn’t want it and couldn’t stop it….Children. As mentioned above, the commonly heard use of Diaper Discipline or DD is used on children to get the desired behavior. And it’s used for as little as a weekend or used sometimes until the child moves out of the home. DD typically uses shame, embarrassment and fear to get the child to change their behavior to what the parent(s) desire.

Diaper Discipline – The effectiveness of Diaper Discipline:

     Because the use of diaper discipline has never been observed (as far as I know of) by a therapist or psychiatrist, it’s unclear how safe it is mentally. Some say it’s simply marginally abusive considered to things like spankings or beatings. However it does threaten the child's dignity and sense of maturity as well as his/her self esteem and self image. Care must be taken when evaluating stories of DD use, and to separate parents and children who might be involved with the practice in reality, from AB/DLs who advocate the practice purely because they think they would have liked to have had this experience when they were a child. The big difference is, AB/TB/DL's enjoy it, but children not in the lifestyle, it's pure tourture. There is no other word for it.

     Upon being forced back into diapers, a person's/child's most immediate concern will usually be the unfamiliar physical feelings caused by the diaper between their legs and the look of themselves in the diaper. Children seem to believe that diapers are ONLY for babies, and no one older than about 2 or 3 should be wearing one. And if you do, those who wear one are typically called a "baby" by other children. Heck, even when I was using diapers for my bed wetting, I found it very hard to get the thought that “only babies wear diapers” out of my mind. And I wasn’t being forced into using diapers. So it makes you wonder what a kid with no wetting or messing problems is thinking of himself/herself being put in a diaper.

     For a child just being put back in diapers, they will find it an uncomfortable feeling for a child unused to wearing them, and this discomfort is a important part of DD. It seems it's important to feel uncomfortable as it serves as a constant reminder of the child's diapered status. Diapers are thicker than normal underwear (and can be as thick as a inch thick with the overnight disposables), and the bulk between their legs typically alters a child’s walk and cause them to waddle slightly.

     Trapped body heat also causes diapers to feel much warmer than underwear and perspiration can cause a diaper to feel wet even if it has not been urinated in. On a superficial level, the appearance of a diaper will also cause the wearer to be concerned about their personal image, whether it's simply the outline of the diaper on their figure or the diaper being fully visible. Passing a mirror in the hallway and seeing themselves in a diaper can be upsetting. Doubling diapers up is an easy and effective way of increasing bulk, heat, and visibility to enhance the discipline. And also extend the time between changes.

     In terms of using the diapers, toilet training is one of the most significant events in a human being's life; children are taught at an early age that wetting and soiling themselves is not acceptable, and this plays a crucial part in their psychological development. Therefore, returning a child to diapers and forcing them to basically reverse their toilet training causes much emotional turmoil. It also deprives them of the most basic level of privacy and independence; they no longer have any control over where and when to relieve themselves.

     Males react differently to diaper discipline than females do. As an external part of his anatomy, a man relies on being able to access his genitals to confirm their presence and state, and putting him in diapers deprives him of this. Females on the other hand, are accustomed to their genitals being internal, and so diapers will not affect them in the same way.

     Women also experience a form of incontinence in the menstrual cycle; having no control over a bodily function and relying on diaper-like products for personal hygiene and discretion. A man, on the other hand, lacks this experience, and so being in diapers will be more foreign to him.

Diaper Discipline – Diaper use and diaper changes:

     Whether or not a child being disciplined has to use their diapers, is the decision of their parent or guardian. Some children may be allowed to have their diapers temporarily removed for access to the bathroom for both urine and a BM, some only get the diaper removed for a BM and have to use the diaper for urine, while others may be denied access to a toilet completely and forced to urinate and defecate inside their diapers instead.

     One of the Diaper Discipline Site's emphasizes the importance of children and teenagers using their diapers for their intended purpose. While acknowledging that diapers should be kept hidden under normal clothes in public, they maintain that the bathroom should be off-limits at all times and children should use pull-ups at school. Responding to questions about any long-term medical problems, the site explains that some people may lose bladder and bowel control as they get used to diapers, but claim this can be quickly re-trained within a week after the discipline is over.

     It is common for teenagers to refuse to use their diapers out of defiance; while they will not be able to avoid wetting their diaper for long, messy diapers are much easier to hold off due to bowel movements being naturally less urgent. The article "Diapering Techniques: Dealing with a Stubborn Teen", which refers to diaper use in disciplinary, medical, and recreational situations, sympathizes with teenagers in diapers, pointing out that being forced to wet or soil yourself and then sit in it until you are changed is an unpleasant experience for most people.

     Nevertheless, it stresses that they do not have a choice in the matter, and offers several suggestions for encouraging a dirty diaper. Communication between parent and child is emphasized, with medication such as enama's, suppositories and laxatives recommended as more drastic solutions for forcing the child to mess their diaper. It further advised that children are allowed to spend time in their messy diaper to explore the feelings and record their thoughts in a journal.

    Soiled diapers are a particularly effective aspect of the discipline because of their unfamiliarity; a wet diaper feels similar to a wet bathing suit but the sensations of being in a full diaper (messy diaper) will be quite alien to the wearer as they will probably not have experienced such a feeling since infancy. Spending time in their soiled diapers will be a traumatic process for the person being disciplined and they will likely be unable to concentrate on anything other than the content of their diaper, making them feel like more of a baby, the whole point of the punishment. “You’re acting like a baby, so you will be treated like one”.

    One of the sites explains that diapers should be changed regularly and both parents are encouraged to take part in this "social and intimate exchange"; fathers who were reluctant to change diapers when their children were babies are advised that participation is "very important". However, for some families, they believe that having preset times for being changed (after breakfast, after lunch, after dinner and before bed), makes the punishment more effective. Parents should check diapers regularly, even out in public, since children may not always approach them for a change.

     Older children will not necessarily need changing after wetting their diapers, but it is important to change them soon after they have a bowel movement for health reasons. The existence of pubic hair can make clean up difficult, so some parents choose to shave it off for hygiene; shaving also serves to enhance discomfort as the wearer will be unable to scratch the subsequent itch through their diaper.

     Rarely is the person being disciplined allowed to change their own diapers and in some cases measures are actively taken to prevent this through the use of restrictive clothing such as locking plastic pants (picture of plastic pants shown earlier in article), blanket sleepers made with the zipper in the back to prevent removal, onsies like a baby or toddler would wear and other types of restrictive infantile items.

Diaper Discipline – What others say about this form of “Discipline”:

     Diaper discipline as a parental practice can be controversial. At the website Child Abuse Effects, one user described a situation in which a seventeen-year-old boy had been kept in diapers since age twelve, asking whether this was legal and would be considered abuse. Violence and abuse prevention educator Darlene Barriere responded by saying that forcibly diapering an adolescent as punishment was not illegal, as far as she knew. However, she claimed that treating a teenager like a small child would fall under a form of abuse known as "rejecting", describing it as a "humiliating, and cruel and unusual punishment". She speculated that it may also be considered neglect, physical or sexual abuse depending on where, when and how the boy in question is being made to use diapers.

     Upon being contacted by another reader, who detailed his own experiences with diaper discipline, Barriere once again addressed the issue. She explained that people who administer diaper discipline are experimenting with a controversial psychology known as “regression therapy” that can be emotionally devastating even when administered professionally, and that parents would not consider the practice were they aware of it’s consequences.

     The reader in question, Robert P., offered his own opinions regarding the appearance of diaper discipline versus it's actual effects. He claimed that children being disciplined may appear calm and well-behaved, when in reality this obedience is a result of their self-esteem having been destroyed and their social development severely hindered. Robert concluded that diaper discipline is "the killing of a human soul". In contrast, One Diaper Discipline Site described keeping children in diapers as "relatively safe" when compared to other common methods of discipline such as spanking, screaming, and medication such as Ritalin.

     On my own community web site, I am a vocal critic of the use of diaper discipline and sites that support it. I explain diaper discipline as "making children wear diapers without pants, they can't change themselves, bathroom is off limits just to name a few stipulations. And this can go on sometimes for months all over things like wetting the bed, talking back, bad school grades, fighting with siblings and other similar things."

     I believe that the punishment is too extreme for the offences it is used for, and that using humiliation as discipline will cause psychological damage. I just fail to see the logic behind the punishment. Infact, the former Yahoo 360 page (Recently Removed) owner, *******, had a motto saying "Diaper Discipline. All teens should have diaper rash. Thick diapers for you." The page claimed to help parents whose children were out of control, but "How is getting a B in math out of control? And how is being put in diapers for a month supposed to help? And how is keeping them in a wet/messy diaper until they get diaper rash discipline?"

     In a short conversation with one owner of a diaper discipline site over instant messenger, we talked about it's use. He said on more than one time that if he had children of his own, he feels he would use diaper discipline on them if they misbehaved. When asked about diaper rash, he says he feels letting a mild diaper rash develop is all part of being in diapers and sees no problem with it.

     It should be noted that putting a child or teenager back in diapers—even against their will—because they wet the bed is not generally considered diaper discipline, but rather a practical solution to a medical condition. At the very least, a plastic sheet on the mattress. Only if the child is actually being punished for the supposed offence of wetting their bed would their diapers be seen as a form of discipline.

     Issues regarding the child's independence, privacy, dignity and self esteem usually play a far more vital role in bed wetting cases than they do during diaper discipline, and the diapers themselves are often disguised as regular underwear (Goodnites or Underjams for example) in order to reduce the child's embarrassment. Whereas diaper discipline is a fairly obscure practice, using diapers to manage bedwetting is relatively common, with mainstream products such as GoodNites and UnderJams marketed specifically for that purpose.

Diaper Discipline – In Popular Culture:

     Diaper discipline is often featured in many AB/DL fiction as a plot device to get older children, teenagers, and adults into diapers. "Poor Little Rich Boy", one of the Diaper Daze series of AB/DL comic books, tells the story of Erik, a seventeen-year-old boy who is put on a "baby discipline programme" by his step-mother after the death of his father. Erik's step-mother decides to blackmail the rebellious teenager by denying him his inheritance unless he agrees to live as her helpless baby. The comic depicts Erik being subjected to various humiliations as he is paraded in front of his amused aunt, who begins to consider baby discipline for her own son.

     Diaper discipline is portrayed as a form of child abuse in the independent film "Redemption" by Michael Bryson. When a girl accidentally causes her father's death in a car accident, her mother—who already resented her daughter for the close relationship she shared with her father—begins punishing her for wetting the bed by making the twelve-year-old wear diapers. The girl is beaten until she submits to being diapered. The girl has to wear diapers, suck a baby's pacifier, and drink from a baby bottle in plain sight indoors. The girl is taken out (just showes the girl in a dress and her mom leave out the front door) with her mom after her mom checks to see she still has the diaper on under her dress and her mom is carrying a diaper bag on her shoulder as they walk out the front door. Later in the movie her diaper is changed and the girl is dragged out the back door into the back yard with the girls mother saying “time to go outside, that’s where little girls go who don’t behave”. The girl grabs onto the door frame to try to prevent being pulled outside for all to see while crying and begging not to be taken outside. Eventually she can't take anymore humiliation and kills her mother with a gun. Years later, the girl is now married and feels compelled to relive her mother's punishments by wearing diapers and drinking from a baby bottle. Of course I do not endorse killing someone to get out of this punishment. The child or witness should instead call the police (911) or child services abuse tip line at (1-800-4-A-CHILD/1-800-422-4453), or tell a teach or school therapist for help.

     Your able to download the movie "Redemption" if you like. You need to also download and install a video program called DIVX. You can download it by going to “http://www.divx.com/en/win". Then after you download the movie you will be able to play it. You can download the video to watch by going to the address below. Click on the text button “Download Original (201,380,020 bytes) to get a copy of the movie:

http://www.myotherdrive.com/dyn/pv/812.043015.
26042009.72584.6a64fi/Redemption.avi

     In the 2005 series of UK reality series Big Brother, contestant Maxwell was humorously diaper disciplined by Big Brother. As punishment for setting fire to a pair of underpants, the twenty four year old was forced to dress up as a baby and sit on the "naughty step".

Diaper Discipline – Closing:

     What I found interesting and shocking was that the owner of one site, *****, does not have children. He has never used DD on any children, and DD was never used on him. But yet this man gives out instructions on how parents should punish their children with DD. He has no idea what psychological damage is being done by doing this. In fact many of the children who are in DD long term, lose much if not all of their bladder and/or bowel control.

     What is also interesting is several people I have talked to who were punished with DD said they left home and moved away, some to another state and never had contact with their parents again. Many are also in therapy in hopes to undo the damage that was done. Some felt that they deserved the punishment. Feeling that bad grades and talking back got them the punishment they deserved, that they should have been good.

     It’s true a child should be punished for disrespecting their parents or breaking rules, but not like that. There are plenty of good ways to discipline a child without tearing them down with shame, fear and embarrassment. Time outs, grounding them, taking away toys, taking away cell phones or computer, having to do extra chores around the house, having to go to bed early. Punishments that do not shame, embarrass or otherwise tear down a child. But instead the parents turned to DD to make their children behave better. What went on that caused these children to feel that what they did was so bad, so horrible, to deserve such a cruel punishment like DD? To think it was fair and what they had coming to them.

     And as much as the site owner and other parents tell me it doesn’t happen, DD can (and in several children) has cause the child to develop a fetish for the diapers and/or baby items that are being used on them. They become what is known as a TB or DL. Not because they wore a diaper, or drank from a bottle, but because of the situation it was done in. It’s a way to cope with the trauma of what happened, or is still happening to them. Not everyone punished with DD will end up being TB or DL, but I noticed a pretty fair amount did. Of course I don’t know every victim, and didn’t talk to everyone who ever was punished with diapers and or baby items so I don't know the exact numbers. But those I have talked to over the years who were punished using diaper discipline, have seemed to turn to being TB or DL as a means to deal with it.

     If you are being punished with diaper discipline, or know of anyone who is being abused using diaper discipline, you should call your local child protective services and make a report. If you are a child and being abuse, please call the police (911) or tell your teacher at school or a therapist if you see one, what is going on. They have to report the abuse by law, or they can go to jail. You can also make a child abuse report by calling a child abuse tipline at (1800)4-A-CHILD/(1800)422-4453.

     You can also e-mail them at "dcfsqualityassurance@co.fresno.ca.us". They should be able to send it to the right office that handles your area. Be as specific as possible. Weather you e-mail, or call to report it, make sure you include your first and last time as well as your address where you (or the child being abused) live. Include as much detail as you can about what is happening so they can get you/the child the help they need to make it stop. No one deserves to get a punishment like this. No one!

The worst pain, is the pain you don't see. Emotional pain. There is no pill or Band-Aid for the hurt a child feels inside.

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gypsy12143 profile image

gypsy12143  says:
3 months ago

It is disturbing to know there are parents who find this punishment acceptable. How can you say you love your child and then humiliate them? I would punish my children with groundings and no game system for a night. Take away privileges not their natural instinct to use a toilet. I do wish these parents would think about the long term effects- emotinal and psychological. Maybe if this practice is talked about more, the pointlessness of it will become clear. So you taught your child to mess himself- is that what you want for your legacy? Is that what you want on your tombstone- here lies Mom, she taught me to crap myself at 14 Thanks for nothing. Just a thought.

Stanley_19802 profile image

Stanley_19802  says:
3 months ago

Hello Gypsy,

Yes, it really is. I do alot of crying over the children I hear are abused with this so called "Punishment". I have seen it done with my own eyes, have had friends it's been done to and have been threatened with it myself. The fear is pretty intense. I know when I was threatened my heart felt like it was going to pound out of my chest I was so scared. And all these images were running through my mind. What I would look like in a diaper, wondering who was going to change me, what would they do to get the diaper on me, how long would it be for....just thought after thought. It's scary. I can't imagine having it not only happen, but having to deal with it for a few days, let alone those who have to deal with it every day till they move out. It's horrible. Your child should fear you. Respect you yes, but not fear you. It's given me nightmares. Call me sensitive, but coming from a abusive childhood, ANY child abuse really bothers me alot. I hope this form of it can be ended in the near future. Some law passed that is specifically for diaper discipline. That will be a happy day for me I can tell you.

-Stanley

kbennett51770 profile image

kbennett51770  says:
3 months ago

You know, I couldn't read your entire article but from what I did read I got sick to my stomach. There is no reason to make a child or adult wear a diaper unless its for medical reasons. How barbaric and inhumane!

Stanley_19802 profile image

Stanley_19802  says:
3 months ago

Hello Kbennett,

I am with you. When I first discovered the site about it, I thought it was some kind of joke, or some kind of BDSM site or something. I didn't think it was really being done to kids. What I found when I joined to learn more was a complete shock. I found post after post from parents about different reasons why each parent was using it. Post after post of weekly reports from the parents about how well the child is going along with it or what they had to do to make them go along with it. Such as putting the locking plastic pants on the children who attempted to remove the diapers. Or putting restraints on a changing table to keep the child from fighting being changed. I honestly cried when I read the posts. It was done to my brother for his bed wetting, not as bad, just the diapers, but it was still so hard to watch him go through that. And it wasn't being done so he could wake up dry, it was being done to teach him a lesson, to punish him for something he can't control. It was my family's treatment of my brother that I hid my own bed wetting. I still have a wetting problem (started at 13 years old), it wasn't till I was 20 years old that friends of mine told me I should get it checked out. I was terrified if my parents found out, that I would get the same treatment as my brother. Yea I am in diapers to manage the wetting, however the big difference is, it's my choice, not forced onto me. And when I read about kids being forced into diapers, not because they have a wetting problem, but because they got a D in math, it just makes me angry to no end. I cannot stand child abuse. I came from a very abusive childhood, and I get extreamly angry when I hear about child abuse, especially stuff like this. It makes no sence. How is a diaper and having to sleep in a crib going to make the kids do better on tests. The crib and diapers are not teaching them math. It's pointless. Get the kid a tutor. I mean come on. I hope by this hub being here, that people learn of this horrible so called "discipline" and put a stop to it. Report it if seen. The only reason it's able to happen, is because people don't know it really happens. It's true it's not as common as beatting a child, but it happens. Currently on one site, they have over 130 members last I checked. So, you figure atleast 130 children are waking up to another day of this. And some parents have 2-3 children. It makes me very angry, and as you, sick to my stomach. I just want to cry when I think about all these children are going through. I just hope they get help soon. No child should have to be treated like that.

-Stanley

Ronaldf  says:
3 months ago

Hello stanley I'm glad you were able to put this article back on line. Every time I look into this subject. It makes me up set whats being done. There a lot I could say. And as you know I do. Do not want to get you in troble so I will stay quite on here just droped in to say good article.

Ronald

Stanley_19802 profile image

Stanley_19802  says:
3 months ago

Hello Ronald,

Me too. I have read many posts by parents doing this and it makes me cry sometimes. Not just because of the form of the punishment, but because it's typically used for such trivial things. It's very extream, and as wrong as it is, I can see it maybe being defended if the child was like in a gang, or drinking or doing drugs. But most often, it's for things like talking back, no cleaning their room or bed wetting. Things a simple time out or grounding. As far as the bed wetting, no child should be punished for that for any reason. Children can't control it no matter how embarrassed, shamed, or beatten.

-Stanley

ghostwritermsc07 profile image

ghostwritermsc07  says:
2 months ago

Ok diaper punishment is pretty sick in my opinion. Anything that is degrading to a child is wrong and will end up blowing up in the parent's face. My own Mother was verbally abusive toward me and it had a very negative impact on how I grew and developed. Kid's need to be made to feel good about themselves which leads to high confidence and more successful lives.

Stanley_19802 profile image

Stanley_19802  says:
2 months ago

Hello,

Thanks for your post Ghostwriter. I am so very sorry to hear your mom has abusive to you. **hugs**. I hope you know that it wasn't your fault. No one, child or adult deserves to be abused. I came from a pretty abusive childhood myself. Both my parents and much of my family, abused by staff at school (name calling, locked in a solitary room, restrained on the floor and having an elbow into my shoulder blade till I was screaming because I needed to quietly step outside the room to cool off, ect), and abused at the psych hospitals my mom used to punish me including a spinal injury while there. It is because of what I have experienced in my childhood is why I feel so passionate when it comes to the topic of abuse. I admit, I turned out a bit better than some I have seen coming from abuse. And specifically regarding diaper discipline, I have seen what the children often turn into, the side effects of it's use. They last WELL into the adult years. I have had some friends it was done to, and seen it used on my brother more than once, and was threatened with it by a school teacher. Fear, embarrassment and shame is not how you discipline a child. It's how you be a bully. Your kids are supposed to be able to trust you, to know you have their back, to know they will always be safe at home. Since I was 10 years old, I have feared my parents. I was always afraid of what they would do to me. Most punishments were not spankings, there were branches off trees, belts, fists on my back while curled into a ball, my mom liying and telling the hospital I was suicidal so she didn't have to punish me, had staff let students attack me while they stood guard at the door while I had defend myself. My life, I have rarely felt safe, I could never have trust in my parents to keep me safe, and I was always terrified to be around them. At one point, my mom tried to get rid of me while my dad sat and did nothing. When she couldn't get me into a group home, she lied to child services telling them I beat my mom and my brother and they were afraid for their lives. I was about to be taken away forever. That is till my parents saw the price tag of $600.00 a month child support. Then all the sudden I wasn't violent. It hurt me alot that my mother would make up such lies to get rid of me, and that my dad wouldn't say anything in my defence. I never want a child to grow up the why I did, or the way others have. It is no wonder drug and alchohol use is in such a high rate. What happened to families being there for eachother? Loving each other. Doing what they can to help, even if it's just to listen. It's truely a sad world we are living in right now, and things really need to change. These kids need love, not to be beatten into fear. A child should respect their parents, not fear them. I know for some it means the same thing, but there really is a difference. Most of what happened in my childhood, could have been prevented with a discussion. But like most children, they are not heard. Parents, teachers, adults...they believe they already know the whole story and see no reason to ask the child what is going on. Listen to your children. When something happens, ask why they did what they did. You may be missing some very important piece of information. I got in trouble alot of fighting. What my parents didn't know and didn't care to ask was, that I was fighting to protect myself from a bully. Most schools have a "If I didn't see it, it didn't happen" rule. And rarely do they see the first hit, they almost always see the bully's target fighting them off and so the target get's in trouble and the bully get's off scot free. ASK!!! That is all I can say. Sit down, and talk with your children. It's not hard. You would be surprised how easy something is to fix, if you know the WHOLE story. And if it was the child at fault, make the punishment reasonable. Being sent to school in diapers for a week is NOT REASONABLE.

-Stanley

a mom  says:
6 weeks ago

i have used cloth diaper and rubber pants punishment on my 16 year old daughter for two years now and it is effective.when she has to be punished,she has to lay on her bed and i pin the diaper on her then put the rubber pants on her.she is made to wear them around the house and to church.

janddplus4 profile image

janddplus4  says:
6 weeks ago

I am glad I happened upon your hub. My five year old daughter (will be six in two months) has been having problems pooping in her pants at school because she is having too much fun and doesn't want to take the time to go to the restroom. It took considerable conversation with her to find out the cause of her accidents. I didn't know if they were actual "accidents", as in she didn't know what was happening, or whether they were by choice, as in she didn't want to take time to go to the restroom. Either way, I wondered whether I should send her to school wearing pullups, since this was happening two or three times a week. I discussed this with my husband, and he was for it, saying "if she's going to crap her pants like a baby, she needs to wear a diaper like a baby." That is when it hit me that it just didn't feel right. It might feel like punishment. It had not occured to me to punish her for her accidents. I just wanted to deal with it properly. I didn't know if there was a physical problem--I took her to the doctor, and the doctor asked about her diet, and even physically examined her, and concluded that it was not lack of bowel control. I considered taking her to a psychologist--maybe there was a deep underlying cause. I had a conference with her teacher to make sure that my daughter was not afraid to ask permission to go to the restroom. Finally, I sat down with my daughter and asked her how she thought we could fix this problem. I asked her whether she wanted to wear diapers to school. She was shocked at the thought. She didn't want to. I pointed out that it would be easier for me to clean her up in a diaper, and a diaper would at least keep it from running down her legs. I asked her whether she planned to keep this as an ongoing habit, or whether she could stop. The discussion seems to have fixed our problem. It has been over a week since she pooped her pants at school. It frightens me to think that someone may have seen it as child abuse had I decided to send her to school in a diaper. But it frightens me more after reading your hub to think of the psychological repercussions it may have had on her if she had felt that it was a type of punishment.

Ivorwen profile image

Ivorwen  says:
6 weeks ago

When I saw the title of your article I thought, "Oh great! Another person who has bought the diaper companies cr*p about not training a child to use the toilet until 3 1/2 or 4 years of age." What I read was much worse...

I had no idea this was a wide spread sort of punishment, though I had heard of it before -- in a very mild form. i.e. a potty trained child decides to poop in their dresser and is made to were a cloth diaper so that they have to tell an adult when they need to use the bathroom, in order to have the diaper removed (not so they can use a diaper).

I don't think children should ever be punished for bed wetting. If it is an ongoing problem, then get them the help they need, be it diapers for night time or an absorbent pad, and if they are big enough, teach them how to use the washing machine and make a bed.

To be punished in such a manner for low grades or back talking shows a serious problem in the parents. There are much better ways to deal with such things!

Sorry for rambling on.

lmn profile image

lmn  says:
6 weeks ago

I received it as a punishment ONCE and that was enough! I was bed wetting every night, and for me I THINK it was an attention seeking thing (from the story mum told). I was placed in a diaper that morning and used the 'if you want to act like a baby you will be treated like one'. When I did need to go to the toilet though, she removed the nappy and then placed it back on again. Mum was doing day care at the time and I remember her showing one of the other parents my punishment. I was mortified. She removed the diaper later on that afternoon and after that I never wet the bed again!

Was it an effective punishment? It worked. Was it suitable? NO! This is a mild case compared to what you wrote about before. It is a humiliating practice and straight out CHILD ABUSE. Until I read this I had no idea that it was a practiced form of punishment.

Stanley_19802 profile image

Stanley_19802  says:
6 weeks ago

Hello,

Let me say again, that diapering a child because the child/teen has a wetting or messing problem is one thing. There is a reason for the protection. And even still, it should be done not as a punishment, but as a tool to manage the child's wetting and/or messing accidents. The same reason we put diapers on our babies. A tool for containing the accidents. But to put a diaper on a child for such things as low grades is cruel as clearly low grades in school, not cleaning their room or doing their chores is NOT acting like a baby. Babies don't go to school, babies don't have to clean thier rooms because their parents straighten up the child's room typically till the child is around 2 years old, and of course we don't send our 4 month old's out to take out the trash. Bottom line is to purposely embarrass and shame children is cruel, mean and NOT being a loving parent. But again I will say, there is a huge difference between having a child with a wetting and or messing problem wear protection (diaper or goodnites/underjams for the older children age 8-18), and making a child wear a diaper for a non-wetting or messing problem such as low grades in history or not taking out the trash tuesday night. It's cruel to use shame and embarrassment on the children we are supposed to love. You just don't hurt the ones you love. Not like that. The lasting effects are life long and deeply painful. Even though it does not look that way.

-Stanley

Rachel  says:
5 weeks ago

I found out about this a number of months ago. it made me feel physically sick. Thank you for taking a voice against this horrible and disgusting abuse.

no one you advocates this punishment should be allowed near children. The psycological effects are devastating and unless the effects of the punishment get more publicity and a larger fight against it i will not stop thinking of all the children out there who are suffering.

Stanley_19802 profile image

Stanley_19802  says:
5 weeks ago

Hello Rachel,

Thank you for your post. That's the whole point of this hub. To raise awareness about this awful method of abuse. I couldn't imagine doing this as a parent. Yes punish a child when they need correcting. But not this way. This is WAY too far. I just couldn't destroy my childs self esteem like this. Nor put them through so much pain. I understand the use of protection if a child was having accidents. And if protection was used, I would go out of my way to prevent his/her friends or the rest of the family from finding out. It's not something that has to be made public outside the home. And of course they would be able to wear whatever they were comfortable wearing over the diaper. But to make my child sit in a diaper and t-shirt and lock the bathroom door to force them to have an accident is cruel. And to diaper them for something other than an accident is wrong. Diapers are a tool to manage accidents, not a tool to inflict fear, shame and embarrassment. Thank you again for your support in ending this form of abuse.

-Stanley

Mrs. Obvious profile image

Mrs. Obvious  says:
5 weeks ago

wow, people really are sick. I thought that child abuse in general was a thing of the past. It amazes me that someone could rationalize this as appropriate in any form. Definitely cruel. Maybe they should be sent to prison and had this done to them! I don't blame those kids for never speaking to the parents ever again. Yuck. Thanks for the excellent info.

Stanley_19802 profile image

Stanley_19802  says:
5 weeks ago

Hello Mrs Obvious,

I do hope we as a people do get to the point where we no longer hurt each other. Let alone hurt a child who can't protect themselves. I have no respect for someone who would hurt a child who can't even fight back. Hurting a child is being a coward. I am also with you on your thought of sending them to prison and have the abuse be done to them. I also feel child abusers should have to have them same thing done to them, for the same amount of time, and with the force equal to what they used. I can say for pretty sure, if there was a law in place where the abuser got what they gave, there would be very few who would abuse a child. The other problem is the laws in place make it to where the child has to admit abuse or unless there is clear without doubt abuse before child services will act. As far as the child talking about it, most are told if they tell it will be worse or something will happen to someone they care about. In fact as I mentioned above, many parents who use DD have that rule if the child talks, the punishment gets much worse and is typically extended for a additional 6 months besides how ever long they had before. So they keep quiet in hopes it will stop. Not to mention, I don't know many kids that would tell anyone at all that they are in diapers, let alone the use of any other baby items like having to sleep in a crib and use a bottle. As far as seeing injuries, there are none with this form of abuse in exception to the once in awhile diaper rash. And for those who are beatten, it's normally not until the child is nearly killed or does die before there is enough proof of abuse. And by then, it's too late. I think about the children having to deal with abuse every day. I have had some children who have been punished either with diapers, or been beat for bed wetting, and it took me several hours to talk them out of suicide because they couldn't take it anymore but at the same time were terrfied to turn their parents in. Those times are some when I have cried the most for them. It hurts me to the core when I learn of a child in pain. I know the pain well having come from a abusive childhood myself, and not by one person, but many. I was told I was lieing when I tried to report my abusers. And like many others, I also turned to suicide to make the abuse stop. I was one of the lucky ones that failed and I am here now to stand up for those without a voice. I hope more will do the same and report an abuser when they learn it's happening. Thank you for your thoughts about this Mrs Obvious. Take care of yourself.

-Stanley

ivori profile image

ivori  says:
4 weeks ago

I didn't know about this diaper thing. How awful. Seems the so-called 'adults' should take the time to explain, reason, and treat children as human beings. What right does anyone have to belittle and degrade another? It's wrong, just wrong!

kerrinicoles  says:
3 weeks ago

I just have to say that this was an article that made me cry. It is such a shame that there are parents that really think this is anything besides abuse. I think that every social service office should be all over these websites finding out who these people are and arresting them. I have two children and I could not wait for them to be out of diapers, why would anyone want to make their children feel ashamed like that. I want to say thank you for all the information, this is a topic that I have never seen before and I think it was wonderfully written. You also provided a lot of information to all of us about a very important topic. Hopefully there are people out there now trying to shut down such sites and protest againist this type of abuse!

spiceyfood profile image

spiceyfood  says:
2 weeks ago

I think this is the sad part of life, I feel childern are made to be loved and in most case's it is that way. I could even read the artical I stated to cry and it sick. We are all human and if we have childern we should do our best to love them, that is all a child know how to do is love you so why not just love them back it is not right for all people to have kids, I feel if the child is being abuse by the parents and a person know's this they should step and try to fix the problem. CPS isn't always the answer we as americans can work together and save a child if we know it is going on. Life is short we should get involved and make noise for the helpless kids, I get sick everytime i hear about a child getting hurt. I feel there is a better way. CPS is just as bad and I know there is other options it's called American stand up and take action againest parents who abuse the kids. I love all kids and I know, and it shouldn't hurt to be a child. But we don't always get it. I will fight for what I beleive in and it is make some noise for all the kids.We can if we just keep it in our back yard and stay in the loop. Kids are our knew America. So please be aware we are the ones who can fix it, after all they look up to us for every thing. I feel it is a sign for all of us to make a differnce when we hear something bad, I feel god is telling us we are all connected love you child more then anything for god gave them to us. It's our gift so we should love our babies and love the ones that aren't are to. there is a better to save a child life we just need to do it. Melinda Bocook

guess  says:
2 weeks ago

this is just too disturbing for me to even finish reading im border line bipolar and and just something about reading the first few lines are pissing me off

Stanley_19802 profile image

Stanley_19802  says:
2 weeks ago

Hello,

The whole point of this hub is to bring awareness of this form of abuse. The main reason it happens without others knowing is people just don't know it happens. When they see a child out and about in diapers they assume the child is delayed or is in diapers due to an accident or something. The thought of the child being in diapers as a punishment just doesn't enter ones mind. I am not saying every kid in a diaper is being punished. I just would like to see people keep an eye open for it. Such things like a child coming to school or day care in diapers all the sudden with a strange excuse. Or if the child says it's a punishment, take them serious. At least check it out. If you can, straight up ask the child, in private of course. If a doctors note seems off, call the doctor and check it out. Follow your gut. If you feel something is wrong with the situation, it most likely is. I would rather have someone call child services or the police to check it out, than to do nothing and have this form of abuse go on for years as I have seen happen. There are children right this second going through this. Their posts I read online but can do nothing because you need a name and address to file a report. So I can do nothing but try to get the parents to understand the damage they are doing, or encourage the child to call the police themselves. It's hard not to be able to do nothing. I have reported the web site that these parents meet at and swap idea's but was told there was nothing that can be done about it without a name and address. It makes me very angry. I just hope by making this hub, people will learn of it and step in for a child they learn are going through this. I know this stuff is upsetting to read about, but think of the children who are LIVING this every day for such small offences as not cleaning their room the first time asked, or a C in math. Stuff a tutor or a grounding for breaking the rules would be good enough for. It's sad that child abuse runs rampart. People are so used to hearing about it that people don't even blink an eye at it anymore. Things need to change. I like a line I read not long ago that says it all "It shouldn't hurt to be a child".

-Stanley

Emily  says:
8 days ago

I was diaper punished as a child. I was never exposed to anyone, just my mom. Restraints were never used. After a good hand spanking and a lecture about why i was being diapered I was willing to cooperate. I think as long as its done with love and trust between the parent and child ONLY that DD can be an effective tool.

There is a fine line between punishment and abuse. I never felt abused by the way i was punished because my mother always assured me and taught me with love.

Suzanne Alicie profile image

Suzanne Alicie  says:
6 days ago

Wow, this is appalling! I have two boys who are 12 and 16 now and like any parent I'm sure when they were little and had accidents or wet the bed, I told them that if it continued they would have to go back to wearing baby diapers, but never in a million years would I dream of putting any child over 4 in a diaper- as a punishment!

Stanley_19802 profile image

Stanley_19802  says:
6 days ago

Hello,

Thank you for your replies Emily and Suzanna. Emily, I am not sure why you were put in diapers as a punishment. I am not saying that being put in diapers for bed wetting is a punishment. As most parents who do this is done with love in that it's being done to keep the bed dry so their child isn't waking up in a cold wet bed and the child can get decent nights sleep. How it becomes a punishment is when it goes from doing it to help the child, to doing it to punish the child. Such as locking bathroom doors leaving the child/teen no other choice but to wet/mess themselves. Diapering with the intent to cause shame and embarrassment. Taking away pants and shorts to make the diaper visible to company and others in the home. Using diapers on a child who doesn't have a bladder or bowel problem, such as parents who use DD for things like talking back, low grades and so on. Issues that have nothing to do with wetting or messing. Wearing diapers isn't going to make a child suddenly smart to get that A. If anything it causes lower grades because they spend the day worrying about what will happen when they get home. or the kids who are sent to school in diapers, spend the day worrying if friends or other kids will find out and they will become the laughing stock at school. DD is one of the cruelest forms of child abuse I have come across. I have read message after message from parents on www.diaperdisciplinesite.com. The parents describe how upset their children are, what methods can be done to make it worse. Such as where to get locking plastic pants to prevent the child from taking the diaper off. Or where to get restraints to put on their childs baby crib to keep them from getting out on their own. It's made me cry more than once to read the things these parents do while the whole time claming to love their child and how it's "in their best interest". The owner of the site tells all the parents how it's not against the law. And they believe him. I checked with child services, it IS against the law. True there isn't a spacific law just for the use of DD, but there are two laws that do cover it. The parents who do this are those who are at their wits end and desperate for something. They just don't know what it does to children. It's true that some can take it and come out ok on the other end, but most are not so lucky. I have read where more than a few kill themselves because they can't take it anymore. I run a website for the support of those with a bed wetting problem. I have had 5 kids come to me in messenger telling me that they can't take the punishments done to them for their bed wetting. DD is one thing done to children who wet the bed. One child was being tied to his bed with a metel screen under him with a model railroad train trasnformer hooked to it, when he went he got shocked. These kids have come to me telling me of the pain done to them and how they have pills in their hand, razor blade ready to slice their wrist to make it stop. I have spent hours talking to these kids trying to give them hope, that they done have to die to make it stop. I am not mad that these kids came to me, I am mad they were pushed to suicide to begin with. If the kids do manage to make it through it, the come out with serious problems. My brother was punished for his bed wetting, once with DD, and threatened once with it. He drinks often, has a SERIOUS anger problem, depression and that's just to name a few. I put this hub out to try to educate people that first this happens, and second, what can happen by doing it. The damage that's done. You can punish a child without the use of shame, fear and embarrassment. I have dealt with kids of all ages and not once had to hit them, not once did I have to resort to the threat of DD for those who wet the bed. With the bed wetting, I told them it wasn't their fault and that I wasn't mad. For those that stay overnight (family and friends) there is a plastic sheet on all the beds in the house. Mostly for the kids, but I have had some adults stay over and have an accident. The only thing I require is they let me know so I can take care of it. For kids I know wet the bed I use the "double bed method". Basically you put a plastic sheet on the bed, then a fitted sheet, a top sheet and blanket. Then you add the second plastic sheet, fitted sheet, top sheet and blanket. That way when there is an accident overnight, the first set of bedding can be removed and the second set is ready to go and also warm from being slept on so your not getting into bed with cold sheets from a cabinet. It's also faster to remove the first set of bedding so your only up about 10 minutes and then back in bed and asleep. I know this is another long reply. I have so much to say on the topic of child abuse and bed wetting. So I tend to go on a tangent on these topics. So again I am sorry for the long reply. Thanks for your replies everyone.

-Stanley

Stanley_19802@yahoo.com

Adrian  says:
2 days ago

Reading through that DD site I have come to believe that most of the people there are just perverts creating stories to fulfil sick fantasies but, unfortunately, even if a minority are true it is tragic.

I have seen this flagged on a child abuse site and it does breach the Convention for the Rights of the child.

Cruel and unusual punishment and developmentally appropriate clothing and toys to name just 2 breaches.

Unfortunately, the USA has not signed this declaration and many countries who have signed it do little to enforce it. This is something that, even if reported, I feel will fly below the radar in terms of child protections. It's not beating or sexual and therefore it will be registared but not acted upon... Just like neglect and emotion abuse isn't.

But hopefully reporting it will shame parents into stopping it... If not there is always a nice piece of equipment that measures 2x4 to help parents understand that punishment hurts.

melanie holt  says:
31 hours ago

im 13 and i wet the bed when i was 5 and ive not been out of diapers since i wear them 24/7 im not aloud to change myself i have a dummie a cot a pram a bottle and bonnet and a high chair

Stanley_19802 profile image

Stanley_19802  says:
28 hours ago

Hello Adrian,

Many people find it hard to believe that this form of abuse can happen. They think that SOMEONE would notice. The truth is, most people just assume the child is autistic or delayed in some way. And they assume that's the reason the child is in diapers or being taken around in a stroller at a much older age. Yes, there are children in the world who needs diapers for one reason or another. And yes, some children who can't walk need a special stroller to get them around. The parents who use the particular punishment know this. When they send the kids to school in diapers, they tell the school "my son had a bladder infection and needs to wear diapers for awhile". And the school just takes it as fact without even asking for a doctors note. On the website for diaper discipline many parents post excuses they used to send their child to school in diapers for others to use. They swap idea's on how to force the child to go in the diapers, and how to make it worse for the child if they refuse to go along with it. One parent on a different site wanted to give the child a diaper rash on purpose to make the punishment worse and painful. She poured some bleach into a diaper and put the diaper on the child along with a pair of locking plastic pants to prevent the diaper from being removed. And of course, the child developed a severe diaper rash. It makes me cry when I read about some of the things these so called parents do to their children for things like bed wetting, talking back, low grades and other similar offences. Punishing a child for bed wetting is one that makes me so much more angry because they set the child up to fail. Bed wetting isn't something a child has control over. They are not doing it on purpose. And to punish them for something they do not have control over is not fair. They have no way to prevent wetting short of staying up all night.

To the comment of a 2X4 to the head to knock some sence into them, I get to feeling that way to. I have had a friend have it done to him for a little over 10 years, and have seen the problems he has now almost 30 years later. I watched my brother be put in diapers for his bed wetting twice. And have again seen the damage done. He has serious anger and depression issues. He blocked out that time in his life. He has no memory of being walked through the department store with our aunt to by the plastic pants and stuff. And he has no memory of our grandma getting a diaper from the woman next door to diaper him with for wetting the bed at her house, nor having to be made to sleep in the bath tub at night by our grandma. I think a law should be made that whatever child abuse is done, the abuser should have to take the same abuse they dished out for the same amount of time, with the same weapon/object used with the force equal to what was used. I really think if this was done, people would think twice about abusing a child if they knew they would get what they dished out.

And Melanie, I am very sorry your parents are doing this to you. Bed wetting is NOT your fault. There are millions of kids all over the world who wet the bed. Most stop around the age of 16. Even if you wear diapers to manage it, you are old enough to change yourself. And you should be allowed to change yourself. I was your age when I started wetting and was in diapers to manage it. My parents never diapered me, it was my job to make sure I had the diaper on before I went to bed. And as far as the other baby items such as the pacifire, crib, stroller, bottle, and high chair. Your NOT a baby because you wet the bed. And wearing diapers to manage the problem doesn't make you a baby either. Wearing protection doesn't make you a baby, or make you less important. Your just being responcible for your problem. If anything, that makes you mature. You do not deserve to be treated like a baby for this. I hope you know that. No one deserves to be treated like a baby, for this or anything else. If you didn't know, what your parents are doing IS against the law. To make it stop, you need to call the police or your school therapist that you are being abused. As hard as it will be, you need to tell them about everything they are doing to you. You need to tell them that they have you in diapers 24 hours a day even though you only need them at night for the accidents. Tell them they are making you sleep in the crib, that they make you eat your meals in a high chair, that they make you drink from a baby bottle...everything. They need to know all this so they have enough evidence to build a case to make this stop. You can contact child services by calling (1800)4-A-CHILD/(1800)422-4453. Tell them you are being abused and that you need help. Tell them about everything that is being done to you and for how long. They will send you help. If it's too scary and embarrassing to say, write a letter about everything that's being done to you in as much detail as you can. Give it to the police or your therapist. Let them know you wrote it in the letter because you don't feel comfortable saying it all. Sign and date it as well. If I can be of any help, you can contact me at Stanley_19802@yahoo.com. Take care of yourself Melanie, you have a bright future ahead of you. You don't deserve this and you don't have to live like this. It will be ok.

-Stanley

nigelking profile image

nigelking  says:
26 hours ago

Hello Stanley - I, and many people who first see this Hub, start reading with a little check in our minds that it may be some sort of weird paedo fetish Hubber, enjoying his own sick fantasy. However, having read the Hub and many of your answers, I realise this is probably not the case. However, I would like to suggest that you remove the picture of the little boy. It worries me that someone may find it distressing, or even worse, 'interesting'. The picture is also demeaning to the young boy depicted. I think your Hub text makes the point in a strong way and therefore does not really need the picture.

Stanley_19802 profile image

Stanley_19802  says:
20 hours ago

Hello Nigelking,

It's understandable people who first see this start thinking it's some sexual fantasy or something. If you do a search for it ones finds several thousand sites with fake stories using diaper discipline as a plot line, sexual sites who use diaper discipline as a turn on and so on. Very few listings are of actual events. Mostly because those that have it done typically don't mention it. I mean who wants peope to know about such an embarrassing incident in their lives. There is a message board, the only one I know of for the topic called www.diaperdisciplinesite.com where the parents meet and swap ideas on how to use it, how to make the child go along with it and how to make it worse if the kids resist. I have spent about 5 years on that board trying to give the parents alternitives to using this. Several times I have been kicked off the board for letting the parents know that it IS indeed against the law to do this. The owner keeps telling them it's not against the law and it has no side effects. I have seen the effects. The owner of the site doesn't care how much damage it does. I honestly think he gets off on hearing the weekly reports from the parents. As far as the picture, it was taken from the site under the topic of how to tape two baby diapers together to add to the child's embarrassment. I don't know who the child is, but I have done what I can to reduce any identifying marks from the picture. The whole point of the picture is for proof that it happens. So many people think it's fake and doesn't happen. The goal is, if enough people learn about this horrible form of abuse and know it's child abuse and against the law, when they see or hear of it going on they will report it. There is always going be someone out there who might find the picture "interesting" as you put it. I thank you though for your thoughts on the picture and the hub as a whole. Take care.

-Stanley

Peter  says:
6 hours ago

Diaper Punishment should be illegal. It restricts natural rights. I'm suprised that adolesants in "DD" don't comit suicide.

Stanley_19802 profile image

Stanley_19802  says:
5 hours ago

Hello Peter,

It IS against the law. I contacted child services and asked if there was any law against it. Though there isn't a law just for diaper discipline, it is covered by two other laws which are:

PC 11165.3: As used in this article, “The willful harming or injuring of a child or the endangering of the person or health of a child” means a situation in which any person willfully causes or permits any child to suffer, or inflicts thereon, unjustifiable physical pain or mental suffering, or having the care or custody of any child, willfully causes or permits the person or health of the child to be placed in a situation in which his or her person or health is endangered.

PC 11165.4: As used in this article, “Unlawful corporal punishment or injury” means a situation where any person willfully inflicts upon any child any cruel or inhuman corporal punishment or injury resulting in a traumatic condition.

As far as kids getting diaper discipline commiting sucide, it is already happening. About 3-4 years ago I read a online news paper story about a kid who was wetting the bed. His parents decided to do DD with him. They put him in diapers and put him in a play pen on the portch in just a diaper and t-shirt. Kids from his school walked by and saw him in the playpen in diapers and made comments about it. The next day at school he was made fun of. It seems the kids from the day before told many in the school about it. On the way home from school the kid jumped off a freeway overpass and was killed by a car. He couldn't take it. He's not the first to attempt suicide to make it stop, and sadly he probably won't be the last.

It just shocks me what parents will do to their kids. I run a web site for people of all ages with bladder and bowel control problems. I have spent many late nights talking with suicidal teens being punished for wetting the bed. And yea, some where getting diaper discipline, others spanked daily for it. I have come across news stories about how a dad tied his kid to the bed ontop of a metal screen and hooked up a model railroad transformer to it and when the kid wet he was shocked. And another parent made their kid sit in boiling water up to the waist every time their kid wet the bed. I will never understand why some parents go nuts over something MILLIONS of kids do. It's not the end of the world. Most grow out of it by age 15 or 16. And it shocks me that parents who take their kids to the doctor and hears they can't find a medical cause for it assume that means the kid is doing it on purpose. Clearly we still have a long way to go as far as public education about bed wetting. And we really need to come a long way fast on child abuse. As the saying I like goes "It shouldn't hurt to be a child". Thank you Peter for your thoughts and feelings about this topic.

-Stanley

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