It seems like everybody is looking for an easy way to lose weight, and a thousand scammers are out there trying to make money by telling you that their way is the quickest, the easiest, the most effective way - just look at the ads that display with this page, I guarantee one of them is a plan to get you thin in no time at all (and the advertiser rich).

The problem with weight loss plans is that every one works - for some people. Often they're created by someone who found the perfect way for them, and think it will work for everyone. If you're very lucky, you find the right plan for your lifestyle and mindset and get down to that magical target weight that you've been dreaming of. But many people don't.

The fact is that most diet plans work brilliantly for people who have bags of self control and discipline - they just need a solid set of steps they can follow. For those of us (maybe the majority) who aren't so fortunate, who get bored or distracted easily, those steps rapidly turn into a painful grind and we end up giving up or, worse, rebelling against the boredom by snacking and slobbing.

So here's a "Diet plan" for the rest of us, a set of ten ideas (five for eating, five for exercising) that'll help you lose weight without boring yourself into a muumuu. Like I said, no plan will be perfect for you, and some of these points just won't work for your life - that's why they're ideas, not rules. But I think out of the ten you'll find six or seven that do. Let me know how you get on!

1. Find yourself some exercise with a purpose. We all know the best exercise is the kind you do without meaning to - a good hard physical job, for example. Exercising for the sake of it can get boring very quickly. Your job may not give you much exercise, but you can find a form of exercise with a similar purpose - a hobby like gardening or DIY for example. That way you're achieving something and exercise is just a byproduct. Riding a bike instead of driving has three benefits - it gets you where you're going, it saves you money and you're getting fit too.
2. Play to your attention span. A longterm fixed exercise plan may not be for you, but if you keep ringing the changes you may be able to keep your interest. Keep a list of quick and easy workouts you can do on the spot, and whenever you find a new one add it to the list - my latest is burpees, as demonstrated by Mike Rowe from Dirty Jobs. Then, whenever you feel the urge, just pick one and do it.
3. Multi-task. Find exercises you can do in front of the TV, or put some music or audiobooks on your MP3 player. Keep your mind busy, and the exercise goes by that much more easily. Yeah, this one's kind of common sense. But sometimes it helps to be reminded.
4. Make your exercise plan your own, and make it a game. Forget "scientifically optimised" exercises by supposed experts - if a doctor's selling exercise plans by mail order he probably wasn't that great at being a doctor. If you are doing any exercise that gets you breathing heavily, that is a good thing. So find exercises that interest you, and try them out. Mix and match. Keep a scoreboard - how many situps can you do? How many burpees? How long can you hold a brick out in front of you? (you'll be surprised what a good workout that one is). Beat your score for yesterday, and you just got fitter.
   
5. Don't. Nobody wants to admit it, but some people will never be able to stick with an exercise program. They just won't. Sorry. And they'll make themselves miserable by trying one after another, each one reinforcing a feeling of incapability which washes out into every aspect of their lives. By all means try everything, but don't beat yourself up if you don't succeed. Instead, make sure you get in half an hour of brisk walking every day - that's the recommended minimum amount of exercise you should be getting. If you can do that, and manage your eating, and you don't have a ludicrously slow metabolism, most people will (eventually) naturally reach a healthy weight. And if you feel happy and good about yourself by avoiding all that torture and self-hatred, it's a lot easier to eat well. Good news huh?
   

1. Cook. Homemade food - even comfort food - is almost always lower in fats and sugars than the bought alternative. And taking the little bit of extra time to make it yourself will help you appreciate your food better, rather than just jamming it into your face. If you're looking for ideas, check out my food blog - I'll be posting a bunch of cheap and easy meals (end shameless plug).
   
2. Plan your meals in advance. If you have a good meal to look forward to, you are much less likely to snack in between, and if you have a "structured" meal with, say, a main course and a dessert, you are less likely to keep munching. Good news - having a (reasonably healthy) dessert can actually help you cut down your eating, because it signals to your brain that the meal is over and gets you out of "eat mode".
3. Use your distraction. This is the one dieticians will kill me for. But for some people, and with a pinch of common sense, it works. If you're the type of person who gets engrossed in an activity and forgets to eat - let it happen. If you're inclined to crash into the day without breakfast, let yourself run until hunger really grabs you. But when you're ready to eat, don't gorge out - remind yourself of all the calories you've just "saved" and don't undo the good work. Start planning a meal when you feel your energy running down, and eat what you've planned. Take your time and enjoy that meal, get done with eating and go back to your tasks. And for God's sake eat if you start to feel weak or dizzy - don't push yourself till you're ill.
4. Make the good stuff easy and the bad stuff hard - or don't. This is one thing I agree with dieticians on, in some cases. If there's a takeaway or a snack emporium that tends to draw you in, avoid walking past it. Keep healthy snacks on hand, and don't make your life harder by having temptations like chocolate and crisps around. But this doesn't work for everybody - a packet of fruit and nuts or a piece of fruit may just put you into "eat mode", or (if you've got a bad sugar and fat addiction) make you feel unsatisfied and lead to less healthy snacking. If you find that's the case, cut out the snacks entirely and focus on your meals.
5. Enlist help and eliminate bad influences. Accept that you'll not always be able to resist temptation, and ask your co-workers, friends and family to help you. Everybody has one hilarious friend who thinks it's funny to tempt you with unhealthy food when you're dieting. Punch them in the head.
   

Disclaimer: I am not a doctor, a dietician, or otherwise qualified to advise you on your health. And I'm more interested in being entertaining than accurate. Take my advice with a pinch of salt. Don't do things if they might make you sick. And always consult a physician before beginning a program of punching your friends in the head.

Mark Hewitt is an English writer, foodie, cook, psychologist, techie and shaman. At the start of 2007 he sold or gave away almost all his possessions and hitch-hiked across North America for a year and a quarter, the purpose being (at least in part) to figure out why he would want to do such a thing. You can find more of his work at Silverknife.co.uk