As a little girl growing up in a very rural farm community. I was the only girl within a 2 mile radius and the only girl, grandaughter, neice or such in our family. Spoiled, yes by everyone but my mother, who was a city girl at heart. This still amazes me that she married my down to earth hard working father and settled for a life in the country. Oh yes, she had a good life, we were never poor but I think somewhere down deep she enjoyed feeling superior to everyone else, she always had more things, fancier designer clothes, the perfect figure and her hair done professionally years before that was common place in our little town of 250 citizens which most likely included in this count was a few cows and dogs.

I spent hours with my father and grandfather, checking the cattle, playing in the grain trucks, trying to become a member of my brothers elite "boys only tree house club" as well as playing with turtles, feeding the baby calves, rescuing damaged piglets and helping grandma cook up a storm on butchering day.

Yet as school age approached I was faced with a new dilema. I did like dresses and dressing up on occassion but I also like my overalls and overall shorts, (which to this day I still wear). On my first day at school, mom had purchased me a beautiful new dress with all the lace and frills, a matching purse, silky lacy white socks and black patent leather shoes. With my long wavy blone hair pulled back in a pony tail, I excitedly ran to meet the bus and begin my new journey as a first grader.

School seemed exciting to me as I loved to learn and could already read. I was excited to meet new friends and become a school girl. School was wonderful and my teacher Mrs. Kleeme was so much fun. I remember getting our reading book handed out it was all about Dick, Jane and Spot!! Now if that doesnt give away my age, nothing will!! Unpacking all my school supplies and seeing the giant blackboards was exciting in its own right. Then a loud bell rang-- it was recess. Wow, my first recess, running into the school yard with the rest of the kids, I was proud to show everyone that my grandparents farm was just across the fence. With my grandma out there smiling and calling my class over for her hot homemade chocolate chip cookes, I thought recess was great.

As we played in the yard and run and scuffeled through the gravel and dirt play ground, I couldn't have been happier. I even enjoyed playing Red Rover Red Rover and Farmer in the Dell. Then a bit of kick ball and back to class.

The day was great and I was so excited, the bus ride was a lot of fun and I couldn't wait to get home and tell all the stories I had about my new day. As the bus stopped in front of my house I eagerly grabbed my backpack and jumped off the bus. My mother was in the front yard waiting on me and as I eagerly waved at her as I ran up the drive way, I noticed a very angry look on her face--I had no idea what was going on or why she would look like that, I hadn't gotten in trouble at school and I followed all the rules in class. I was a bit confused but I asked Mom why do you look so mad?

My mother was very eager to express her reason. She begin by telling me that the beautiful new dress she bought me had a dirt stain on the back, I had forgotten my purse at school and my socks, the white lacy socks were dusty and dirty and the back of my socks had wore down inside my new patent leather shoes that were now scuffed from the gravel in the playground. She had spent a lot of money on my outfit and time getting me to look so cute and I didn't care. She thought it was time I acted more lady like and forgot about playing those games in the gravel. She couldn't understand why I didn't just swing or stay in and write on the chalk board or maybe just take a walk.

Well her anger extended into the evening and into the next few years of my life as I always had new dresses, patent leather shoes and lacy socks. The first day of school for me was only the beginning of the tension between my mother and myself throughout my school years and still to this day. I truly believe that the anger I saw on my first day of school made a major impact on me for the rest of my life. Oh and yes, My father couldn't wait to hear about my day and couldn't care less about that dress--Thank God for the comfort and peace I found when I sit on his lap and got to share the excitment of my first day of school.