Once upon a time two people fell in love. They romanced one another with stories, adventure, laughter and lovemaking. One day one of them asked the other to marry him/her and he/she said yes. They planned the big beautiful day, walked down the aisle, vowed to love one another for better or worse in front of everyone they invited and were pronounced husband and wife. They believed that they were hitched, forever enschrined in holy or state matrimony as long as they both should live. They lived happily ever after.

For most people this is true. According to divorcemag.com only about 4 people out of every thousand get divorced each year. Thats over a quarter million people that get divorced each year. When you look at the e-news and the tabloids one would think everyone that marries gets divorced. I personnally live with two divorcees, four of my five siblings that married have divorced, most of my friends are divorced or dating someone divorced, most of my coworkers have been divorced or are related to someone who's divorced. Undoubtedly everyone reading this article knows someone thats divorced.

Why am I talking about it? Because divorce is ugly. Divorce has ruined so many people emotionally and financially. The lawyers have to be hired because few states allow divorce to be granted without a lawyer representing each party. Friends of mine were actually told by their respective lawyers that they shouldn't come to an agreeable solution right away, each were told to fight the other. Dispicable. Two people that were once madly in love are facing off in court warring over the 401k. Not to mention custody of the children. There are nightmare stories out there. One man found his wife in bed with another man. She didn't work. They have three children. The judge told him to move out, so he did. Then he was told to hand over his bank account, he didn't want to so he fought it, lost. The man who cuckolded him, moved into his house. The judge said that was fine. The judge said he couldn't pick his kids up from school but the new man living in his house with his wife could. To the average person this is a nightmare. So why does anyone get married?

Marriage is a legal contract. When you want to break a legal contract you need a lawyer and a court date. Neither of which you need the day you marry. If you worked and your spouse did not, you will give him/her half of everything plus alimony when you divorce. It will cost you more money than three DUI's. If you have children, you will have to come to an agreement about when you can and can't see them and how much you have to give your non-working spouse to support them. None of these things are discussed before marriage unless you stipulate everything in a pre-nup. Currently there are hundreds of cases in court around the USA where pre-nups are being disputed, so I wouldn't count on one protecting me.

Finally what do I have to say about divorce nightmares, legal fees, court costs, alimony, split everything in half, child custody, child support....It does get costly and emotionally damaging. So why marry? The tax break is laughable so its not a good reason. The wedding day itself often takes endless time and money to plan (bridezilla), do you really need a ring and contract to feel secure in your relationship. It won't keep that person from leaving you, unless he/she is afraid it will just cost too much money to do so. In that event Scott Peterson comes to mind, divorce would have cost to much, so what did he do..he killed his pregnant wife. Men and women should not be joined together solely because its too expensive not to be. Thats warped. I know alot of people are happily married, but wouldn't they be just as happy together if they weren't married. You can still chose the last name for your child and claim your children as dependants on your taxes. There are child support laws in effect and about 83 million dollars are paid annually in child support expenses.

I for one think that with the option of divorce, the idea that marriage is forever is over. There's no point in entering into a contract thats breakable at any time for a sum of money, and lots of distress. Either its a life contract or its not, period. How many people really and truly would get married if it was in fact an unbreakable contract? Would you?

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