Phew. I'm all done with my housework and ready to go out. Got to see how much money I have in my bank account so I can budget those Jaeger(meister) Bombs... (click, click, click..loading your balance...)

-$8.79 , F*CK!

(scrolling.....)

Emillionaire for three charges jumps out, two that were verified: 6 cents and $1.97 from last week for shipping and handling charges for a free booklet on Google stuff. THEN an out-of-the-blue, whopping $ 47.00 today!

Who has time for Terms and Conditions? Just scroll down and click the accept button. That's why we keep lawyers on retainer, if something comes up to bite us in the A because we were too busy to read it, right?

Moving right along in my cushy, make-believe Care-A-Lot...

(There's $5 Monopoly dollars in it for someone who can tell me who lives in Care-A-Lot. Remember the song?)

With the help of some of my more responsible and business-savvy friends here at HubPages, I will figure out exactly what the heck is going on.

Has anyone been duped by this company? Had a good experience with them? They are affiliated with Google, I think.

You may say, "Dummy, read the fine print!" but I thought I was just gambling $2, not $50. $hit.

(Taking a nice long drag and a sip-a-joe, comtemplating my email to Emillionaire's support services)

Should I use the poor me? : "We are eating Ramen noodles every night, I need my money" or should I play it cool like Tony Soprano, "You put that money back, right now, or yuh gonna wish yuh had."

This ROTFL video courtesy of Batguano on YouTube.com

Here's what the fine folks at EMillionaire sent me today Tuesday, March 17th 2009:

This message is to notify you that a ticket has been closed.

Ticket ID 1664-1215032212

Last Post:
----------------------------------

Dear Valued Customer,

Your request has been executed, effective immediately. You
have been successfully removed from the eMillionaire Program and you can
expect no further charges to your account. We are sorry to hear that you have
cancelled your membership with us. Many members have been satisfied with the
benefits they get monthly. If there is anything we can do to further assist
you with, please feel free to contact us.

We will process your Refund request, and cancel your account. [Now WHAT is this BS ? >>>There will be a review period for our billing department to ensure that your Refund is valid per our terms and conditions and purchase agreement. You have 7 days right to rescission from date of sign up till the date we received this cancel and refund request.] Please note that all Shipping fee are none refundable. Please allow our billing department 5 to 7 days to review your account. In some cases
you may receive an email with refund confirmation.

Thank you!

Customer Care Specialist

Update: Looks like I need to keep this money in my bank account until EMillionare decides it's a "valid refund". I will bet they pretend they are reviewing and then say "invalid" thinking no one will sue over $47.00. I won't, I just know better now. Updates when I know (7-10 days)

I sent an email back to them asking about the $75.00 in overdraft fees they should owe me because they tapped out my account! (to be cont'd...)

Update #2: (March 25, 2009) No reply on the "What's going on with my refund?" email. Bank says they will need confirmation from the business to take the $75 worth of overdraft fees from my bank account. This is crooked on EMillionaire's end. I think my next step is to dispute the charge with my bank. Maybe that is what I should have done in the first place...

Update #3: (April 7, 2009) Still no reply from EMillionaire, though they re-sent the above email to me but still no refund. I had to contact my bank, file a dispute and they are now looking into this. They refunded the $75 in overdraft fees AND the $47.00 (temporarily) until they can complete their investigation with EMillionaire (6-9 months it could take)

So all in all, this turned out well, I guess. I still did NOT receive the original booklet I had requested ($2.00) that started this whole thing. What a load of crap.

Has anyone had any experiences with EMillionaire?