Hello everyone,
Thought that I would take the challenge and see if I could put together a story about domestic violence directed at men. This is more of a personal expeerience story I would have to say.

Considering myself to be the respondent of abusive behavior from the age of 11 on, which would be about the year 1969. As a young man starting to realize the attraction between a girl and a boy and having two sisters and many female cousins, curiosity became first nature. One summer day my sister, our cousin and myself went for a walk down the railroad tracks near our home. several blocks from home we wandered off the tracks onto a trail leading into a wooded area all the while talking and sharing thoughts. My cousin who happened to be a couple of years older than my sister and I, decided it a good idea to lay down in this clearing and just stare up at the sky and imagine figures in the clouds. After a few minutes of doing that, the curiosity factor started. From there both girls started to pick on me and dare me to take off my clothes. They said, we've never seen a guy undressed and we want to know what you look like under those clothes. being a very shy I refused to get undressed and when I said no, they got mad and attacked me. My cousin held me down, while my sister started undressing me. I struggled and wiggled trying to get free and by this time I was hitting the panic and fear stage.

They did not stop and laughing the whole time, they managed to get my shorts down to my ankles when I finally broke free pulled up my shorts and started to run towards the tracks.

This was the first encounter I'd ever had with girls and it was quite upsetting to me. Later on in life around the eleventh grade, I met my high school sweetheart. We dated, went to movies and parks and played basketball and tennis occasionally.

One day I went to her house after school after we had been seeing each other for months. She invited me in and told me her parents weren't home and would not be home for some time. she ask me if I'd like to go into her room and hang out. I was a little nervous and ask her could we go sit in the backyard. Because of my shyness and the past experiences with girls, there was an issue of trust that I could not overcome. After about an hour, I could tell that she wanted to do more than talk, but I was not ready for more. I crumbled under the pressure to move beyond just hanging out and do some making out. Frightened by my own feelings, I told her I didn't feel well and was going to go home. She got really angry and started punching on me and calling me names. She told me I had serious personal problems and told me to go home, don't call, don't write, don't even speak to her anymore at school. I apologized for not feeling good and for causing her to feel this way.Being a very sensitive guy I was completely crushed by her actions that day.

Because of the encounters and uneasiness I experienced the first few times I was with girls, I've had trouble relating to women all of my life it seems. Things have gotten much better and I'm happy to say I am married for the third time, happily I might add. I think I've found a soulmate and we share every thought and feeling with each other. Communication makes a world of difference in understanding one another.

It was once said to me by someone of much Wisdom, do not let the sun go down on your anger. I have practice this philosophy for quite some time and it has proved to be a lifesaver.

Another good piece of advice I recieved is, remember your wedding vows each and everyday and remember why you decided to marry that person. Love can be a confusing feeling if it is taken in the wrong context.

To avoid hurt, anger and all those other emotions that lead to violence, one must learn to be humble, compromising, understanding, kind, considerate, boy scout like and or Jesuslike.

It is said that, Real men love Jesus. And why not, He for sure loves us!

I have read many stories about domestic violence and spousal abuse,many times it started over something so miniscual, some disagreement that was never resolved.

Here is a link to some information I used to research writing this hub. http://www.dvmen.org/dv-148.htm

In closing I'd just like to say, Kind words heal, acts of selflessness are far better than acts of selfishness and fighting never solved anything.

A little prayer for those who are angry!

A Pure Heart

Give us a pure heart, that we may see Thee,
a humble heart, that we may hear Thee
a heart of love, that we may serve Thee
a heart of faith, that we may live Thee

Thou whom I do not know, but Whose I am.
Thou whom I do not comprehend, but Who has dedicated me to my fate.

Thou- Amen

By: Dag Hammarskjold