DomesticViolence: Endurance Only Made Me Stronger

  Why me? Did I do something to deserve this? What can I do to calm him down? These are questions I would ask myself  while I’m being  victimized. It’s not just being victimized, it’s being victimized by someone you thought loved you so much they would never want to see you hurt. So why is he causing me so much heartache?

   In the beginning of the relationship I would have never imagined it was going to end up the way it did. He would make it priority to cater to me and make sure I was content. He provided me with a stable home so that I can escape the dysfunctional home I was in. He worked hard so that he could buy me my first car. What more could a young woman my age ask for?

   If I knew what price there was to pay for all of that special attention, It wouldn’t have looked to glamorous. The physical abuse started before the verbal. I can’t say that there were any signs before the abuse started. There was just one day everything seemed to hit full force. The  physical was extremely physical. I was choked, punched, slapped and kicked which last for about 30 minutes but it felt as if it was an entire day. He wasn’t  remorseful at all , he began to be verbally abusive . He insisted that I wanted to be with other men and I didn’t care about him. He would say things that caused me to feel really bad as if I gave him reason to think that way. I began to display my apologies although I knew I did nothing wrong.

    It didn’t take that long for the sexual abuse to begin. In the beginning I didn’t know that sexual abuse could happen between people in relationships. I felt that it didn’t matter if I said no to him I had to give in. I realized it was a form of abuse when I sad no on a particular occasion and he got really angry and forced himself on me in a way so aggressive it made me sick to my stomach. The entire time I said no and shed tears only made him more angry. That experience and all the others like it seemed like an eternity.

   I didn’t realize that I could escape this prison until 3 years into the relationship and 2 children later. The abuse got worse as I began to get wiser and stronger. That’s when……………. Cont. in my next hub

By: Kimanesha Wilson