Ego Be Gone! … Works for Harry Potter… A New Earth Discussion Part 20

One way for me to get out of my ego mind and tap into the essence of me is through metaphors. I enjoy symbols that are of my own making. I often rebel against symbols imposed on me by others because they are not symbols that represent my essence. Often icons of religion or governments have evolved into power symbols rather than the original meanings conceived by their creators.

I will admit that I love a good garage/yard sale. One persons discard is the source of great pleasure for another. Sunday morning, I found that great pleasure for $33.

My family didn’t have a lot of disposable income as I was growing up. I was oldest of 5 and my folks watched their pennies. I didn’t have the big erector set, or fancy Lincoln Logs that the only child down the street did. I only had the beginner set of Lincoln Logs – not really enough to build anything really good with. But we didn’t want for any of the basics of life.

I always wanted my own pony. I loved westerns on Television, especially Fury – the story of a boy named Joey and his black stallion. Every Christmas and Birthday, I asked for a pony. I even offered to buy it myself. I lived in a farming community so there were plenty of barns and pastures around. Dad only said ‘It’s not the cost of the pony, it the vet bills too. ’ and he went on to say ‘You’ll get tired and I’ll end up taking care of it.’ That was the end of the discussion.

Horses have become an icon of “making it!” for me. Well, do I really want a horse? If I search my mind, I have to say no. You have to ride it and feed it not just when you want to but all the time. Or, you have to pay someone else to do it for you. What’s the good of that? I don’t’ want to live on a farm. And, I’m a people person – riding on the open range or around a ring is an individual sport. Being the owner of a real live horse is not for me. I know that….

I do have a horse of sorts. It’s rope horse as a decoration in my office. And, yesterday, I bought a saddle. It’s wonderful! It even smells like a horse.

Now, I have a modern house and a western saddle doesn’t fit the décor.

My partner came up with the solution – put it on the big red ball and use it as your office chair, she jokingly said.

Well, that’s exactly what I did and I love it, or at least the concept of it. It’s yet to be seen if I really like sitting on it and working.

Because over the years riding a horse has come to mean that I am important enough to spend money on and spend time on. It has come to symbolize that I, Colleen, can commit to taking care of something.

The keyboard is my reins. I have to feed my business with the contents of my heart, and yes, I have to get up and feed it even when I don’t feel like it. There are vet bills, even antivirus vaccinations.