Ejection, Part 2
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Where am I?
What is this place?
I can't see, I can't hear, I can't feel...
My soul swirls in a mournful state, as if I could hear the cries of those I helped condemn to death.
I can't let go of the torture I have caused, of the fear I have induced.
Playing the God, giving one side a chance.
I am neither here nor there, an edifice of my own creation.
They've always said Hell is full of those
that can't forgive themselves...
A Spark of Past Portrayal
A Second of Eternity
HUH!
There is no love!
I am a duplication,
Innocently.
I was conceived,
So violently...
There was no love,
There was no love for me!
There was only hatred..
I am rape.
I am hate.
I am rape.
I am pure hate!
Every day, I feel anonymous hate.
Forever in the shadow of disgrace!
I am rape,
I am hate.
I am rape,
I am pure hate!
Filled with pain,
A bruised and darknened soul.
Spare me from the
Life that's full of misery....
I don't want to live that way!
I don't want to live that way!
My Eyes Open
to a blinding flashing bright.
Staring down at me are two, big, black eyes. Emotionless they seemed, yet filled with wisdom and composure. "We've been waiting for this moment," those eyes seemed to tell me.
My body feels...my body feels..my body is irrelevant here, I realize. I have left it, anyway, and I had begun careening towards Earth, circa 2009. In my native time line.
I remember now.
"Who..are you? What is this place?" This surrounding of nothingness was not alien, it wasn't even terrifying. Much better than the flames that had seemed to lick my ethereal flesh moments ago, before my past state had been presented to me. Had been..resurrected and electrically sent through the flesh I did not have anymore.
The alien was grey in pallor, it's nose but two holes, it's mouth a snearing slit. It stood erect from it's position over me, as I begun to take control of my astral body. It seemed befuddled, as if it wasn't prepared for my continuation.
For my escape from Hell.
It seemed to sigh, as it languished feet away amidst reproach. "You're a fool, an absolute and utter mistake. We're only here to make sure you're aware of this."
"Oh," I said, producing a chuckle that almost died as it left my non-mouth. "I was hoping you were here to tell me I won a Pulitzer." It didn't seem to respond well to that.
Grabbing my astral body, with great force, it's dark eyes pierced my soul. "Let's just see what our little alien with a savior complex thinks of humanity after it's decidedly deadly deed."
"Let me go!" Struggling for release, I could only gape as it begun to produce a thought I'd been having..
"I see...and you continue to struggle, why?"
"You're subjecting yourself to a lost cause.."
...if i was the son of god
I'd live alone nude in the wilderness.
The animals would speak to me
and approach me without hesitation.
The birds would sing to scarecrows,
in circadian rhythm...
-Inside the garden of desperation
a voice could be heard;
And all the plastic politician devils cry,
as all the skyscrapers come crashing to the ground!
what ever happened to a quiet simple life?!
Innocence is lost as we near our final day...
Deep in the forest
the apparitions are all in attendance.
Phantoms and specters,
converge in silence under the moonlight.
behind this illusion
is a union of the anthropism;
inside the garden of desperation,
a voice could be heard...
And all the plastic politician devils cry
as all the skyscrapers come crashing to the ground!
what ever happened to a quiet simple life?!
Innocence is lost as we near our final day.........
Falling bombs on babylon,
What a perfect ending to it all!
Falling bombs on babylon,
what a perfect ending to it all!
"No," I exclaimed!
"My actions may dictate one belief, my failure to not give in to their fervent need for blood and self hatred is my own fault." I began to step towards the figure, who watched on with a scowl of impudent disbelief. "But I will show you different, because they have shown me the pen is mightier than the sword."
It laughed, in a severely mocking tone. "My dear, confused lxxy. They've been running around in circles since their inception. And you dare to believe this time will be any different?"
I shook my head as I begun to see a portal appear behind the creature. This portal, I knew, was my ticket back to real-time. "First of all, you can't scare me. Second of all, I don't believe. One way or another, they'll either figure it out--or I'll die convincing them."
It's shoulders seemed to set downwards, indicating that it felt powerless to continue. "Alright," it stepped aside and did it's best Vanna White impression. "You may continue towards your fate. But I am merely the messenger, you've yet to meet your own true enemy..."
"...remember these words, as you step forward:"
Slipping past him, my ears ring out with echoes of a prophet:
Fear, fills your heart.
Rip, rip out your lungs,
Burn, burning your soul.
Conception is still unknown-
Hostile, hostile reaction.
Dangerous, dangerous retraction.
Feel, feeling disease-
(I'm not insane, do you hear me, I'm not insane)
Hostile, hostile reaction,
Dangerous, dangerous retraction.
The laws of nature
The laws of man
This volatile paradox will never stand
The laws of nature
The laws of man
This volatile paradox will never stand
Silence starts the rage...
Illusion, illusions in vain!
Existence, existence grows still,
Shadow, shadow I kill.
Hostile, hostile reaction.
Dangerous, dangerous retraction!
The laws of nature
The laws of man
This volatile paradox will never stand
The laws of nature
The laws of man
This volatile paradox will never stand
This volatile paradox will never stand
Release, release your pain.
(Stepping through the portal...)
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Megatronic Space Broadcaster Transceiver
Oh my gosh Ixxy,a brilliant piece of writing. There are what we call the 'Operational PARASITES' of this world and then there are the TRUE HUMANS who live beyond the 'tick tock' world and who are the MESSENGERS OF TODAY. OP's look human, behave in a human way, talk like humans but they have MISSING GENES - THE HUMAN GENES OF EMPATHY, COMPASSION AND LOVE. The OP's (politicians, war mongers, religious fanatics, extremists) they have MISSING GENES AND THEREFORE CANNOT REALISE HUMAN POTENTIAL. They miss that DIVINE SPARK, behave like programmed robots, and assume positions of power to enact and propel their agendas.
Love your work Ixxy, your messages are intense and direct. Brilliant!
Warmest Love & Light
Raging Bull
yorkies,
At this time I have ejected from a terrible situation. I enabled some of those around me to cause harm to each other and themselves. It's tough to not feel guilty, to not be re-assured that they will ever learn.
But sometimes...we must except that when one does not wish to help them selves anymore, their battle has already been lost.
I do feel completely alien to this realm, to what we may call "today." But then again, many have called me "old soul."
Regardless, I am happy to have seen you bring out these words. Keep up the self exploration, and just remember that as much as we may feel at times we don't fit in..it's up to us crazies to provide smiles and thoughts for the ones who have given in to the path of least resistance. ;)
Raging Bull,
I didn't want to say it. ;) But you have, thank you. I agree, many have lost their sight of ALL, of EVERYONE, and have decided that what is best for THEM is for the greater good. But the majority will never be everyone, just as the minority is never a good excuse to perform some disservice to the world at large.
Thank you so much for your kind words, they mean a lot to me. I am happy that you have seen through my little guise, as many have.
Never fear, and never wish poor for the robots.
They've already begun to make themselves obsolete.
Sincerely,
lxxy
lxxy - beautiful work yet again. Better and better, deeper and deeper. You're really reaching down now and pulling out the inner 'stuff'. And I'm so happy that you're happy. Content? I hope that too. You're work is bloody brilliant and never ceases to amaze me.
You continue to astound me with the beauty of your writing. The message, the layout, the mixing of media...it's genius! I agree with frogdropping, better and better, deeper and deeper. Your mind is a wonder to me. :D
froggy friend: I really appreciate your ego stroking. ;) It means a lot, I am glad I can continue to entrance you. =) One more episode, and things begin to change.. ;)
k@ri: Thank you so much
Wow, so bone chilling goodness.
On a funny note there's a friendly chipmunk that tries to look inside the house through the glass door. Sometimes I call and it returns, pauses and then runs away. Cute chipmunk. :)
Thank you =D
I love chipmunks..rodents are the best. ;) Maybe he can be a new forest friend for you. =D G|M's grandmother had a squirrel for awhile.
Such sanity and perseverance in the grip of unbelievers and uncertainty!
AWESOME lxxy!!!:D
Thank you Warren, love your break down =D I suppose it's just eternal optimism. ;)
You do such great work. Thank you
No, thank you for stopping by for my jester's dance in the rue. *bows* Nanu nanu, live long and prosper.
Hello Lxxy, so sorry for just passing now I Have been working a lot. Anyway I am so happy reading your hub, you are a very good writer. I will pass to visit you more. Thank you for your nice hub. I am a big fan. Take care and I see you soon.
keira7,
Thanks for stopping by--don't worry about taking too long. Time is all relative. ;) I hope to see you around more often, but don't worry--I've been quite busy, too..traveling to the new world, I 'spose you could say.
Hope to see a hub out of you soon!
love my yorkies says:
4 months ago
Wow, I think I understand this and feel like I can relate to it as well. You don't really feel like you belong here on this earth, that you're only a visitor from somewhere else. Is that right? Cause that's how I've felt for years but didn't know how to put it into words. I've just never felt like I really belonged here. Awesome!! Thanks so much for putting into words.