I am in Hades. I can tell because I am hot and there is fire spewing from my ears. My face is red and I see the Devil in front of me. The Devil comes in so many forms ...I have 7 email addresses. Each has a purpose. Let me list the reasons...

1. I like forgetting passwords
2. I can't read those curly letters to prove I am me and I think trying over and over and over is fun
3. I don't really remember my Mother's Maiden name so I like typing Mertle Hausenpfefeer a 1,000 times in lower case because the name is so beautiful to the eye
4. I am testing my level of demntia before my daughter's commit me to the home
5. It annoys my current Spouse, my former Spouse and so on...that is why I never use a Spouse's name as a password
6. I like never being able to communicate with Google (Yahoo, AOL, MSN) unless I can get through the 1,000 steps to my problems possible answer
7. My dog ate my password list that I wrote (it worked in 8th Grade)

Today, I lost my password for one of my emails. Lets pretend it was whydoihavesomanyemails@msn.com (do not use this, it will not work). Just like my current email doesn't work and it's real.

So I did what I was told. I said, "Help me, I lost my password I have to use this email in ten minutes or I will die!" Of course, the response is..."this password does not work." I respond out loud, "I know that, I just told you that." Then I am asked to look at the Help Page.

The page is misnamed. It ought to have it's own help page to help those like me who can't wait for answers. I don't care if Vladimir Crobisca asked the question before and received an answer that didn't work either. If I needed answers that did not work, I would simply ask Vladimir myelf.

I can't find most answers. When asked who my first teacher and I answered Mrs. Peters. The response was "nope, that's not her." So I responded ok, I did have four teachers in first grade. Mrs. Peters got pregnant and left. Mrs. Burns got pregnant and left. Mrs. Flowers got pregnant and left. Mr. Dracon got lost in the halls but he never got pregnant.

Mrs Peters, Mrs. Peters, Mrs. Peters help me wherever you are and please tell them you were my first teacher! I will promise to turn in my homework that I said my dog ate. He didn't, I ate it so I wouldn't have to turn it in. My dog took the rap. She was a Boxer and she was tough. Midge...rest in peace.

Well, I have to stop now and send an email to my parole officer and pray he gets it because a new problem is that my computer responds to the email, iaminnocentmyneighborbartdidit@aol.com (again do not use this email) with the words..."we cannot deliver this email as your password is incorrect!"

Spew fire...burn...I am hot...I need air...Mrs. Peters where are you?

Ok, I am getting a new password to use on all my emails...the same one...one I can remember...one no one can guess...ok...I have it...23e5sghsngstus997sss and my passowrd is 98yh65tgd8yd (actually I was sent the password by one of the email servers. It is so much easier!