One of my girlfriends asked me to write a hub about getting the important people in our lives to see things the way we do; ya know, to be positive. I am no expert in this arena. In fact, I have to work at this daily. Two seconds after my girlfriend’s e-mail arrived, however, I got this one from Abraham, aka Esther and Jerry Hicks:

You’re not ever going to teach them how to vibrate, nor would you want to change them all to a place of vibrating just like you. Your work is not to fix them; they are not broken. Your work is to choose from among all of that which feels best to you, and fixate on it as long as it gives you pleasure and joy. And in doing so, you will align with the Energy of your Source, and you will live a magnificent experience. You just have to not let your joy depend upon what anybody else is living, ‘cause that’ll get you every time.

Excerpted from a workshop in Tarrytown, NY on Saturday, May 8th, 2004

If that isn’t a little white flag telling me to stay up past midnight and write a hub, I don’t know what is. So I write this for you, for my friend, but mostly to remind myself.

You can’t make anyone be, feel, or believe anything. We are all on our own paths, with our own agendas. (I’m one of those who believes we write the outline of our lives with the help of our guides and other wise ones before we are born.) I have to remind myself daily, sometimes more, that I only have this one life, my own, to concern myself with. Why would another person bother to incarnate in this life, go through the struggle of being born, endure the teenage years, just so I could come along and take it over. Not likely.

Its hard when you live with someone, or are close to someone, and you have found a better way. You want them to read this book, believe this wise person or follow this teaching. You want them to find the peace or knowledge that you have found. You want them to be more evolved, more loving, more forgiving and more peaceful damn it!

Even though mind control is not an option, there are a couple things you can do. You can hold them in your mind’s eye experiencing peace and health. Visualize them fully and completely as you would visualize that Porsche for yourself. Hold them in that place of love in your mind, full of wisdom, full of empathy and peace. Picture it with emotion, like you should with all your potent visualizations. Feel the gratitude you would feel if they found this place of love and grace that you picture them in. What a loving thing you can do for someone, and so much more evolved than sending them pointless mind messages, “if only you could get a clue and be more like me.”

The other thing you can do for this “lagging” loved one is lead by example. Stay on your path of positive thinking. Keep smiling. Keep manifesting wonderful things into your life. Your loved ones are bound to notice the effects of your behavior in your life. If they are close to you, the positive effects will undoubtedly spill over in to theirs as well.

You can also involve them, without beating them over the head with it. I think this is what my girlfriend meant when she said she uses the subtle approach. I for example, like to prescript my vacations before I leave town. I think in my head how I’d like things to unfold. Now, if I just called a spade a spade, I’d say o.k. lets all visualize how Mommy wants the trip to go. Lets “manifest a perfect day. Let’s use the “law of attraction” to get perfect traffic. “Come on family, put your emotions into it!” (They’d probably through me curb side.) Instead, I ask my family members how they would like our trip, if it were the perfect trip, to unfold. Everyone takes turns describing their dream vacation. Job done, and no one had to know they were pre-scripting.

Try not to judge them. They may be baby souls who chose you to be in their lives to set an example of love and light. In another lifetime the roles may be switched. You would want empathy and understanding bestowed on you. Would you not?