I've never been a big fan of staying friends with my ex-boyfriends. However, as I get older, I recognise the value of their role in networking. There are also a few who I've remained reasonably good friends with because they are truly good men and the relationship simply didn't work out. Like anything in life, sometimes shit happens in relationships and it's nobody's fault. The majority of the men I've invested my time in though have been of questionable character. This is my fault; I take full responsibilities for it. I need to stop dating younger men. I gave this topic some thought today when I bumped into an ex at lunch. And he was smug and annoying. He is only one example. Otherwise this hub would be a thesis.

I've always pride myself on being a good judge of character and my ability to read people and situations. On a daily basis I put my ability to extract information and making people comfortable enough so that they open up to me into good use, and it has served me well professionally. For some reason, when I try to apply these competencies to my love life, I'm rather incompetent. I have consulted with my peers (both males and females, gay and straight), and the general consensus was when I meet a good looking young man I cease to think with my brain. Yes, apparently the phenomenon where another part of your body besides your brain makes a decision affects women too. In this instance, the ex I bumped into was a result of one of those moments. I'm sure though that my exes turn smug and annoying because none of them irritated me while I was with them. Well, most of the time anyway.

Upon seeing him, I pretended I didn't see him. But I was too slow. Smug and Annoying saw me see him. He also had his equally annoying friend with him. Any normal person would just wave and let it be done with. No, this guy walks over to me. Friend in tow with a matching smirk. Then came the pointless small talk about a topic that I no longer cared about but clearly a favourite of his. Himself. About the interviews he's been to, how the interviewers loved him and he thought he did exceptionally well, how much he hates the job that I got him after he was unemployed for 5 months, how it was too easy for him, blah, blah, blah. Then came "how's your love story going?". A lot better now that he's no longer part of the plot. I'm not one to go into "mine's bigger than yours" conversations, so I said "fine". Then came the exchange of looks between the two most annoying boys in the history of the world. Smug and annoying looks. Like they knew something I didn't. I know for a fact that they don't know much. I came out of that relationship with an IQ deficit. Thankfully it was a short one; otherwise the problem could've been irreversible.

After about 5 minutes, which seemed like 5 lifetimes, I managed to pretend I was running late for nothing. To which the response was "oh we have to head off anyway". And then they walked away, like they had ended the encounter because they stopped to talk to me out of pity. As they walked away I secretly hoped they fall in love with each other.

I had no appetite after that so I went and bought myself an overpriced designer umbrella. I also pondered on the pros and cons of being friends with this guy and couldn't find any pros. He added absolutely no value whatsoever. Not even entertainment value. He was just smug and annoying. This wasn't the only incident with this particular person. I guess my peers/focus group was right. I need to look past the good looks and think with my brain. I take full responsibility for this chapter of my love life. Most people would have one of these chapters in their love story.