Just look at my young friend Jimbo. Here he is riding in his very own, which he's outfitted with side-mounted jets and a ridiculously loud sound system:

And he selling THIS Badonkadonk Land Cruiser Tank on Amazon.

And this story he told me when i asked him about THIS.

"What can i say the JL421 Badonkadonk Land Cruiser/Tank this thing is solid, I'll tell you my story.

It was a late night in Boston the redsox had just won the World Series, the town erupted into pandemonium. I sat at a set of stop lights in my JL421 Badonkadonk Land Cruiser/Tank (the Donk) when over the radio I heard the news. The riots were breaking out all over the city, my apartment was on the other side of town, fortunately Amazon had delivered my Donk the day before (Amazon Prime free 2 day baby) . I gunned the 6hp Tecumseh gasoline engine and layed a quarter inch of rubber, I blew through the red light knowing time was not on my side.

As we rolled down Boylston street we were taking sniper fire, my wife relayed the cordenence of the riots she was receiving over the 400 watt premium sound system. The traffic cleared the way as the donk rolled down the street. I had purchased the optional water hose crowd dispersal unit... little did I know how worthless it would prove to be.

As we rounded the corner of Boylston street onto Yawkee Way that's when we hit a flash riot. I looked out over the sea of drunken roudy Red Sox fans, the only thing between me and victory was defeat and between that was my Donk. I hit the break (the JL421 only has one) we skidded to a halt, I screamed to the little lady, lay down a suppressing stream with the water hose. She put up a fight (so proud of her) but the sea of humanity pressed in on us. The Donk was rocking we could hear the crowd trying to make sense of the Donk, I popped in Dirty water and blasted it over the speaker system, to convey that I was a friendly, all of the sudden we heard it a gargled drunken call "That is ARod's JL421 Badonkadonk Land Cruiser" I looked into my wife's eyes and thought it was over for us, I whispered "I loved you" the Chat of who's your daddy ringing, echoing through the Donk.

The crowed thinking that within our iron shell was Alex Rodriguez and that if they could pry it open like an oyster, to get to him, they could take out 86 years of Frustration. They rolled the Donk, I felt the thumps as rioter after drunken rioter scaled my donk, in a display of masculine vibrato. We then felt the heat as a Malakoff cocktail entered the mix, lighting the side of our ride. We could watch our own demise on our satellite TV system I had installed. But the Donk took it all in stride. And then almost as quickly as it started it was over, the crowed was gone. The silence was deafening the as I popped the hatch on my Donk I felt the October sky upon my face, my wife bruised and battered looked into my eyes and just wept.

As the world loses it's mind you will see the value of the Donk line increase get in on the ground floor now... protect yourself today buy the Donk "