I always used to think that finding a soulmate would be a really easy thing to do when you are ready for it. That was when I was younger and perhaps a little more idealistic. Don't get me wrong, for some people, it happens fairly quickly, even before they have started their first full time job. They end up marrying their high school sweetheart and live happily ever after. For others, that ideal partner appears in college or university and still for others, it occurs when they meet someone at work as they are climbing their career ladder. Yet, for a large number of people, the perfect "life long partner" does not seem to appear through any of these means. And this is why the world of internet dating has become increasingly popular. Before, internet dating was something you would not tell your friends you are doing. Now, it would almost be considered strange of you were single for more than a year and never have tried it.

When people first try internet dating, they get quite excited and do a lot of things wrong. They read profiles of people quickly and don't pay attention to the potential things that they may not like about their potential date. The excitement of meeting an attractive, smart and interesting person is enough to make them ignore the little things that they usually don't like - for example smoking, drinking, negative comments, etc.

I fell into this trap when I had first started the internet dating thing. I enjoyed the world of online dating in such a non chalant manner, that I became too open minded about the people I was dating. For example, I value being very active and also appreciate down to earth people. I found myself going on a few dates where there was no interest at all about being active and sometimes a bit of a stuffy attitude towards others in general. It only took a few unpleasant experiences and I quickly found out a few important DO's or DO NOT's when internet dating and trying to find a soul mate:

Don't prolong the meeting process

It is fun to exchange emails for a while, but when you feel that you might be compatible with the other person, suggest speaking on the phone. You'd be surprised how different someone could be on the telephone as opposed to online. On the phone, the person's voice intonation, ability to speak off the cuff, and so much more is revealed fairly quickly. This stage either attracts you more to the person or conversely, starts turning you off. If you are still excited at this point, after a few more telephone conversations...

Suggest to meet for a drink

The chemistry online and on the phone could be sensational and all can go downhill when you meet them as nothing physical seems to click.

Remember, that as a single person, you are often a little vulnerable and you don't even know it. You could meet that person and love almost everything about them, then something pops up that is not too pleasant, for example, the fact that they swear all of the time. You may have disliked swearing all of your life, but in this case, you are so smitten by your date's looks, their intelligence, their outgoing personality, their fashion sense and the fact that they are into you too, that this time you brush the swearing issue under the carpet.

Be honest with yourself

You really have to confront yourself and be honest with yourself. Know what you like in a soul mate and what you don't like. Of course, you'll never find the perfect person all around, but it is very possible to find the perfect person for you.

Remember that in dating, when it smells like fish, it probably IS fish. Take account of all the yellow flags and be honest with yourself when you ask yourself if this is the person you could see yourself with for the rest of your life.

I've learned that you really should not have to reason too much as well. You either have that great feeling or you don't have it. I went on a lot of internet dates when I was looking for my soul mate. I quickly learned to be much more efficient with the filtering process. I figured out quickly that on someone's profile, everything about their profile generally had to excite me. I learned that you need to exchange some sort of picture so you can have some idea of what the other person looks like. I also learned that a picture does not always represent the person perfectly. You could be disappointed once you see the person face to face or you could even be pleasantly surprised that they look even better than their picture.

If conversation with your date is not easy, that is a given. Say thank you and run the other way! Conversation has to be natural, very enjoyable and you want to be excited. You should feel that you do not want to stop the date or leave the telephone even after an hour or two.

Your values have to be in sync. If you care about helping out your friends and family and you value honesty, and your date only thinks about ways to be able to afford a fancy car and tells you that they've learned to avoid their family and friends as much as possible to reach their goals, then you need to realize that you are two different people.

Often, your heart will tell you that this person is not the one, but because of being lonely and enjoying their company somewhat, you may prolong the dating process. Save yourself some time and energy and move on to the next seriously potential candidate for a soul mate. You will have done yourself a favour.

Don't be taken for a ride

Often a potential date might be talking to two or three other interests and won't return your call or email for a week or two. Don't accept this poor behaviour. Give them some allowance, but when it clearly becomes obvious that the other person is not respecting you by not returning telephone calls until they are done with their other dates, move on.

Keep the faith and you'll meet the right person for you

Unfortunately, the chances of quickly meeting someone with whom you totally click on a physical, character and mind level, are fairly low. This may not happen with your first five internet dating encounters. But if you follow some of my advice and are patient with the whole process, never giving up hope, then I guarantee you'll find that special someone, even if it takes a few years of having a drink with over fifty other dates.

I'm happily married to a very special person as a result of remaining strong, keeping an open mind to a variety of possibilities and methods of meeting the right person, not worrying about failure of rejection, and not allowing people to waste my time and energy, especially when I became a little more seasoned at the whole dating thing. Often, nothing great comes without the hard work and challenges and finding a soul mate is no exception.

And remember, love yourself, enjoy the personalities you come across, learn something from all the people you date, learn something about yourself, learn what you really like and don't like and before you know it, you'll be on here offering more pieces of advice on internet dating and finding your soul mate.