It was the most difficult battle of my life.  It didn’t matter that I actually had plenty of normal foods to eat, and shouldn’t be physically hungry. Staying on that thing was nothing less than complete torture!  My mind became my worst and most dreaded enemy.  It mocked me daily, reminding how fat I was, how awful and unworthy. It showed its’ most cruel nature by taunting me, even when I had overcome temptations.  I withstood the trials of food offerings of everything from French fries to cheesecake. I was losing weight. In spite of these successes,  My mind continued its abuse.  “Oh, go ahead and eat”, it would say, “you’ve been so good, a few bites aren’t going to hurt you”.

Or, “just give it up…you’re going to be fat and ugly forever… …you know you’re just going to gain it all back. Why bother?” Then,” No one loves you anyway, at least get some enjoyment out of life. Eat what you want”.

It sounds crazy, and frankly, I thought I was.

It didn’t take long to wonder which was the most evil, the weight, or the mental anguish I endured while dieting.  What was wrong with me??

Surely this was what an alcoholic felt like.  In a split second, I had one of the most profound revelations of the decade.  Food can be an addictive substance!