When Becca needs to think, she thinks best when she can walk in the sand in the cool of the night. There is something about the feel of her bare feet and the sand of the beach that helps her focus on whatever is troubling her.

Tonight she really needs to think. Her mother has dementia. Her mother lives with Becca these days. She was forced to move her mother from the home her mother raised Becca, and her two siblings in two years ago. Becca and her husband live twelve hundred miles away from where Becca grew up. Her siblings lead busy lives with their work and their families. Her brother lives in Australia while her sister is doing a fellowship in Brussels. Becca doesn’t have any children yet and works at home from her computer so there was no other option but to have her mother live with her.

Becca loves her mother but as her mother’s dementia grows she becomes more and more confused even with when it is day and it is night. When she grows restless Becca’s mother turns knobs and switches on or off. Becca’s mother has turned the stove on so many times. So far they have been lucky that only two things have been set on fire. Sleep has not been easy as without warning the television or radio will be on full volume and her mother will not know how they were on even though she is in the same room. Becca’s mother loves to walk. It is an act of less than thirty seconds for her mother to open a door and walk away from the house even when all of the doors are locked. Becca is getting behind on her work and her boss though understanding to a point is getting impatient with her. Her husband is a truck driver and is not home a lot these days.

Tonight Becca is trying to decide if she should put her mother in a nursing home or keep trying to cope with her mother’s increasing dementia. Her siblings support Becca in whatever her decision is but will not help her make it. They have told her that they would leave the decision up to her, but if she did put her mother in a nursing home just to put her in a nice nursing home. Becca’s husband though he loves his mother-in-law to distraction sees what having his mother-in-law at their home is doing to his wife and wants her in a nursing home as quickly as possible.

Becca checked out seven nursing homes and found one that she thought would work out well. Becca does not like nursing homes. She doesn’t even like the smell of them or the cost of them. She found one that smells like a hotel with a staff that seems like they genuinely care about the people they care for. Her mother would be well cared for but this is her mother. This was the lady who took care of her those long months when she recovered from a car wreck and those long days when she suffered from mononucleosis. This was a lady who did without so that her children could have. With her dementia she feels like the lady she is caring for isn’t even her mother and she grieves for her mother. She grieves for her mother who isn’t here any more, a mother that dementia has stolen from her.

Becca feels like such a failure that she is even considering moving her mother to a nursing home, two short years after her mother moved in with her. As Becca struggled with her decision she noticed another set of footsteps in the sand. She wondered whom they belonged to and if that person was like her, making footsteps in the sand in the cool of the night because something was troubling them.

These footsteps belong to Daryl. When Daryl needs to think, he thinks best when he can walk in the sand in the cool of the night. There is something about the feel of his bare feet and the sand of the beach that helps him focus on whatever is troubling him.

Daryl is a happily married man with three children. His younger daughter suffered from an illness when she was two that took her eyesight away. He is fortunate because his family lives near a vision center and belongs to a support group for families of children who have visual impairments. His daughter is a normal, happy active sixteen year old. She is active in swimming, band, Spanish Club and accelerated college prep classes. She has had to learn some extra skills over the years such as Braille and how to use a Braille embosser but she feels like it’s like knowing another foreign language. She wants to be a Spanish teacher when she finishes college. She has learned to use a white cane when she is in an unfamiliar area. She enjoys going to dances and athletic events.

She is a beautiful intelligent young woman. The only thing that sets her apart even from her two sisters is how in spite of themselves Daryl and his wife have been overly protective of her. Tonight Daryl is trying to make a decision. A member of  “Guide Dogs Of America’s Partners” approached him at work two days ago to see if Daryl’s daughter would be interested in a guide dog. He asked her if she wanted to go through the training to get a guide dog and she was so excited. He had never seen her so excited.

Still he wasn’t sure if he should let her go. They had enough money to get her to the training but she has never been away from home or family by herself. It would mean flying in airplane for the first time for her. Granted Daryl and his wife would go with her but as soon as they got to the training facility in Sylmar California they would have to leave her. She would be getting a guide dog and be in places big and small that she had never been to before. Worst of all she would be in San Francisco before her graduation. She only knew small town. All those new people, terrifying sounds and terrifying places how would she handle it without her parents? He was as much afraid to let go as he was for her fears.

As Daryl struggled with his decision he noticed another set of footsteps in the sand. He wondered whom they belonged to and if that person was like him, making footsteps in the sand in the cool of the night because something was troubling them.

These footsteps belonged to Ken. When Ken needs to think, he thinks best when he can walk in the sand in the cool of the night. There was something about the feel of his bare feet and the sand of the beach that helps him focus on whatever is troubling him.

Two weeks ago Ken and his wife were so happy. His wife was expecting their third baby but something was wrong. His wife has been expressing her concerns about something being wrong with her baby for the last week. After several tests were given his wife’s doctor confirmed his wife’s suspicions. Her doctor told them that their baby had a good likelihood of being mentally challenged and would require a great deal of care her whole life. He told them that it was not to late to have an abortion. They both cried.

Tonight Ken is trying to decide how to best support his wife. He knew it wasn’t his choice to make but hers that he should be there to support his wife whatever she decided. The baby growing inside his wife was a product of the love he and his wife have for each other but his wife had so much more of a connection to the baby than he did. The baby was growing inside of her not him. Ultimately it was her decision. He loved her so much he would do whatever it took to support her in her decision. He knew that if they had the baby it would mean a lot of extra expenses but somehow they would handle it. He knew too that if the baby was aborted it would mean a great personal cost for his wife yet somehow he knew he would help her though it. He knew what he would like her to decide but would only offer his thoughts if she asked.

As Ken struggled with his feelings he noticed another set of footsteps in the sand. He wondered whom they belonged to and if that person was like him, making footsteps in the sand in the cool of the night because something was troubling them.

These footsteps belong to Kathy. When Kathy needs to think, she thinks best when she can walk in the sand in the cool of the night. There is something about the feel of her bare feet and the sand of the beach that helps her focus on whatever is troubling her.

Two weeks ago Kathy and her husband were so happy. She and her husband are expecting their third baby but something was wrong. She had felt there was something wrong the last week. The baby wasn’t as active as the baby should be. After several tests were given her doctor confirmed her suspicions. He told them that their baby had a good likelihood of being mentally challenged and would require a great deal of care her whole life. He told them that it was not too late to have an abortion. They both cried.

Tonight Kathy is trying to decide if she should carry the baby to full term or have an abortion. She grieved for her baby, for herself for her other children and for her husband. She had already fallen in love with her baby. Every kick, every movement every hiccup made her love her baby more. If her baby was born mentally challenged how could they handle it financially? How could they spend enough time with all of their children? Would her husband love her baby as much as she did? How would it affect their marriage? What did her husband think? She was so glad her husband loved her dearly. Would he understand if she chose to abort the baby? Could he ever forgive her if she did?

The decision was so hard that it made her head heavy and she looked down on the sand as she walked. As she did she noticed another set of footsteps in the sand. She wondered whom they belonged to and if that person was like her, making footsteps in the sand in the cool of the night because something was troubling them.